Things that made you laugh today (Political Version)

[Shaps]

67% of fall fatalities are among people aged 75 years or older.

To be fair, this is a group of people who'd die from a particularly strong gust of wind or finding out Matlock was canceled decades ago.

Exactly... that's why all stairs and multi-story buildings must be destroyed ASAP. I don't get why this is so hard to get the other side to understand.

Also - 70% of all Covid deaths are 65 and up... not sure why people are so worried about it then... you know? It's just old people...

[drumpel]

I see your homicide firearm and slip/trip/fall deaths and I raise you vehicular deaths!

"NHTSA projects that an estimated 42,915 people died in motor vehicle traffic crashes last year, a 10.5% increase from the 38,824 fatalities in 2020."

https://www.nhtsa.gov/press-releases...fic-fatalities

Time to ban cars. Now we won't have to worry about what's better for the environment, EV or ICE cars because we won't have either!

While we're at it, firearms will be banned! Nothing could go wrong with that decision....

[drumpel]

Then, while I'm on a roll:

I agree that it is time to remove all stairs, they can be very dangerous and cause great harm.



I should be a politician. I can say stupid stuff, promise stupid things, not deliver on them and I can easily spend your money that I take from you because I don't give a shit what you think about what I do with the money.

[Shaps]

Because... "we follow the science"... ROFL.

2+ years ruined for everyone... and they just want you to forget it... and people are dumb enough to actually forget.

[~Rocktar~]

Because... "we follow the science"... ROFL.

2+ years ruined for everyone... and they just want you to forget it... and people are dumb enough to actually forget.

7% of adults think that chocolate milk comes from brown cows. The mostly live in cities and vote Democrat.

[Shaps]

https://www.yahoo.com/finance/news/m...133138956.html

"Is monkeypox an STD? Experts dismiss the question as semantics: ‘The debate is somewhat of a distraction’"

Whew... those experts, sure are expert-ing it up. The Covid push finally did it... opened up the flexibility of definitions and descriptions on a global scale. Now nothing is what it is, nor not what it is... it's just going to be what it is based upon the need of the government to ensure equity among all.

Thanks morons. The powers that be probably didn't think it would be that easy... but we're fucked.

[Methais]

https://www.yahoo.com/finance/news/m...133138956.html

"Is monkeypox an STD? Experts dismiss the question as semantics: ‘The debate is somewhat of a distraction’"

Whew... those experts, sure are expert-ing it up. The Covid push finally did it... opened up the flexibility of definitions and descriptions on a global scale. Now nothing is what it is, nor not what it is... it's just going to be what it is based upon the need of the government to ensure equity among all.

Thanks morons. The powers that be probably didn't think it would be that easy... but we're fucked.

In before they try to push mandatory butt plugs to combat monkeypox.

[Parkbandit]

“If we elect two more senators, we keep the House and Democrats, we’re going to get a lot of unfinished business we’re going to get done. Folks, look, we’ll codify Roe v. Wade. We’ll ban, we’ll ban assault weapons. We’ll protect Social Security and Medicare. We’ll pass universal pre-K. We’ll restore the Childcare Tax Credit. We’ll protect voting rights. We’ll pass election reform and make sure no one, no one, ever has the opportunity to steal an election again!” -President Joe Biden

[~Rocktar~]

In before they try to push mandatory butt plugs to combat monkeypox.

I see what you did there.

[~Rocktar~]

“If we elect two more senators, we keep the House and Democrats, we’re going to get a lot of unfinished business we’re going to get done. Folks, look, we’ll codify Roe v. Wade. We’ll ban, we’ll ban assault weapons. We’ll protect Social Security and Medicare. We’ll pass universal pre-K. We’ll restore the Childcare Tax Credit. We’ll protect voting rights. We’ll pass election reform and make sure no one, no one, ever has the opportunity to steal an election again!” -President Joe Biden

Every time he goes on one of these tirades I just imagine Cartman as Hitler. Now all he needs is a new flag, a march or 3 and a nice chant.