Sexual Abstinence...

[DCSL]

Achievement: Double Pounder With Cheese
By the time you're done with her, her lady parts should look like ground hamburger coated with ranch dressing. Pound hard until achievement complete.

I am so hot for you right now.

[Stanley Burrell]

Bah, here we go.

[Nieninque]

Druggies shouldnt copulate.

That should be all you need to know.

[Parkbandit]

Alright,

Let's hypothesize that there are two people: One male, one female. One very beautiful, attractive, intelligent, kind, good-hearted female.

This female calls the male because she is now homeless due to violating her halfway-house's policy on not consuming a beverage containing the chemical ethanol. Family of female is teaching her a lesson by not letting her stay in her parents' home.

Male says, "Yeah, cool. Stop on by, we'll have the house to ourselves." Which happens to be the truth as male is holding down the fort.

Both male and female have flirted a shit-ton with each other in the past, before female entered a program that claims that abstinence, not just from substances, but sex, for some dumb motherfucking reason, is dangerous and very unhealthy for the female, who is a smokin' young lady, that male cares about. And male knows that female is a very decent human being who does not deserve to be hurt.

Is male not having sex with female the right thing to do? Is it O.K. if female makes several advances that male caves, or at least limit themselves to oral? Please?

Male would like to know what this sexual abstinence bullshit is about. Female's current mental state is vulnerable and clingy and there have been unspoken words on the minds of both male and female pertaining to what they would do together, that is ... before female had serious liver function impairment and is supposed to follow an oath of abstinence even during female's relapse if female is supposed to stay healthy. Male does not want to, in any way, do anything hurtful and/or detrimental to female's recuperation.

Help male not castrate himself.

Ok.. hypothetically.. you are the "male"?

1) Where did your parents go that would take them out of the house for so long?

2) Smoking hot? Really? What else is wrong with her.. besides her addiction to drugs? Is she blind or stupid? Does she have a history of going out with complete losers?

3) You should bang her now.. while she's still obviously under the influence. When she sobers up and sees you for what you are, there's no way in hell it'll happen. Do it now, do it today, do it often. Sure it's not the "right" thing to do.. but when she won't give you the time of day after detox, won't you feel better knowing you tapped that ass?

[Stanley Burrell]

Well, I managed to keep on recycling what you guys told me to do...

...Until she drank all of my vodka, I think, and got me stoned beyond all human comprehension.

What was good though was that I am so fucking blitzed, that when we are the couch and she was making repeated advances at me, it's like ... Wait?

That being said, we, or I, just woke up next to each on the couch on-top of each and, I think, I hopefully at the most, kissed her. Also, my bottom lip is puffed up like I said the wrong thing to somebody.

I kept telling her she was a good person, even when I was pale-faced from the amount of weed I have smoked. Also, I became super paranoid and shaking while reliving long-forgotten trips (happens to me when I smoke up, sometimes) which has been helpful because I think it's interacting quite well with my 60mgs of Lexapro and zero hours of sleep for the last-too-long-time and blocking my weiner from getting hard. I mean, I am so fucking out there right now, that I'm in the outer dark space of the universe infinity times ahead of this one.

I've got some viagra from a thousand years ago and am wanting to eat it, but not a good idea.



Fair day to ye all, Lords and Ladies.

[Liagala]

...Until she drank all of my vodka, I think, and got me stoned beyond all human comprehension.

(Insert Methais facepalm collage here).

Really Stan? You know better. Srsly.

[Jayvn]

smoking hot or hot when you're smoking? SS or it didn't happen...

[Parkbandit]

What a great guy you are. You got a girl, who is in a program where she is supposed to abstain from anything addictive.. and has severe liver problems, drunk off her ass to the point where she would actually have sex with someone like you.. and you were too high and sleep deprived to get a hardon to do it?

As if there hasn't been enough reasons to believe you are a piece of human trash.. I hope your parents didn't come home to a mess.

[Parkbandit]

(Insert Methais facepalm collage here).

Really Stan? You know better. Srsly.

What in his history of posting here makes you believe that Stanley really knows better?

[4a6c1]

Stanley you FUCKED UP.

Getting high severely decreases impact velocity of the ass dive. Now you might hydroplane into the coffee table. Or tear your thong. Or defluff your fros. This is terrible.

Now I have to think of an ass dive contingency plan.