A thread for Ashliana

[Ashliana]

There, there, Parkbandit. Dry those tears. Trump may have spectacularly lost the presidency and Congress -- causing you to lose your shit like your epic meltdown post-Obama's second victory -- but you survived then and you'll survive now. Just hang in there a little longer.

[Parkbandit]

Now, as Commissioner, I demand the Retard Champion to post right after this post!

Stand up and be recognized!

And right on queue:

Deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerppppppppppppppppp

[Ashliana]

And right on queue:

We know you're upset about "accidentally" calling Shaps, and then Methais the Retard Champion. Your Alzheimer's gotten so bad, you can't even keep who you're trying to insult sorted.

[Methais]

You certainly spent a lot of time typing that. Alas, Parkbandit remains the holder of the Retard Champion diaper, as someone so profoundly stupid he had to be put in his place by fellow partisans. You may submit your application for your shot (in triplicate) in another few months.

It took me maybe 2 minutes while I was taking a dump. I understand that you're a bit slow, so it's ok if things take longer for you to do than normal people.

Also, it's "hear," imbecile.

You still haven't caught onto what's happening here? Talk about dense.

Sadly, you were stripped of the Commissionership back in January

By who? You? lol

[Ashliana]

It took me maybe 2 minutes while I was taking a dump. I understand that you're a bit slow, so it's ok if things take longer for you to do than normal people.

TMI.

You still haven't caught onto what's happening here? Talk about dense.

Right.. Every mistake Parkbandit makes is deliberate. He's just pretending to be retarded, only occasionally, and only in ways that he's done previously. Good thing he's got you here to defend his honor.

By who? You? lol

Secret committee. I see not everyone was invited.

[Seizer]

[Methais]

TMI.

I wonder if it's a coincidence that when I was heaving out that first log, I thought "That big *sploosh* sound of a log landing in the bowl reminds me...I wonder what Ashliana is whining about today."

Right.. Every mistake Parkbandit makes is deliberate. He's just pretending to be retarded, only occasionally, and only in ways that he's done previously. Good thing he's got you here to defend his honor.

I mean...only someone as dense as you wouldn't be able to see how blatant he's being with it. But you're so desperate that you'll latch onto anything you possibly can, even though it just makes you look even more dense and retarded.

Secret committee. I see not everyone was invited.

You and your My Little Pony tea party dolls aren't a committee, sorry.

[Ashliana]

I wonder if it's a coincidence that when I was heaving out that first log, I thought "That big *sploosh* sound of a log landing in the bowl reminds me...I wonder what Ashliana is whining about today."

Perhaps you should explore some new interests.

I mean...only someone as dense as you wouldn't be able to see how blatant he's being with it. But you're so desperate that you'll latch onto anything you possibly can, even though it just makes you look even more dense and retarded.

Parkbandit has been making basic errors in both writing and reading for the almost two decades he's been here. He's only done it deliberately a handful of times, no matter how desperately you try to spin out apologetics. Maybe you'll get a shiny button for being part of the Parkbandit Defense Force, though.

You and your My Little Pony tea party dolls aren't a committee, sorry.

Alas, I can't say anymore since you didn't get an invite. You'll have to console yourself with being PB's newly appointed Retard Champion, though.

[Methais]

Perhaps you should explore some new interests.

Everyone takes dumps. Sorry that you're unaware of this basic biological fact.

Parkbandit has been making basic errors in both writing and reading for the almost two decades he's been here. He's only done it deliberately a handful of times, no matter how desperately you try to spin out apologetics. Maybe you'll get a shiny button for being part of the Parkbandit Defense Force, though.

It could be the other way around, and I'd still say the same thing.

You being Retard Champion is one of the many, many reason why it's not the other way around though. And PB not being more dense than lead like you are.

Alas, I can't say anymore since you didn't get an invite. You'll have to console yourself with being PB's newly appointed Retard Champion, though.

You want to be PB so badly that you formed your own My Little Pony committee to declare yourself the Commissioner so that you can be like PB.

Unfortunately that doesn't actually make you Commissioner, since you've always been ineligible to make such decisions.

But it's amusing to see how badly you want to be Parkbandit.

[Ashliana]

Everyone takes dumps. Sorry that you're unaware of this basic biological fact.

That doesn't address anything that I said. Sorry you have poor reading comprehension.

It could be the other way around, and I'd still say the same thing.

You being Retard Champion is one of the many, many reason why it's not the other way around though. And PB not being more dense than lead like you are.

You not being able to tell when PB is making a deliberate or inadvertent mistake isn't my issue, though it's connected to the reason PB declared you the newest Retard Champion today.

You want to be PB so badly that you formed your own My Little Pony committee to declare yourself the Commissioner so that you can be like PB.

Unfortunately that doesn't actually make you Commissioner, since you've always been ineligible to make such decisions.

But it's amusing to see how badly you want to be Parkbandit.

This is peak cringe. Fawning PB simping? Check. Circling back to your Brony fetish? Check. #Yikes.