Thread for Things That Made You Frown Today

[Suppressed Poet]

Do most mothers actually do this? If so, I think I'm going to have to migrate to the "things that blew your mind" folder. My mom is obviously concerned about my welfare and likes me to keep her updated about anything out of the ordinary, but I don't think she even knows where my doctor's office is. She has encouraged me to be independent since I first learned how to put my own socks on (not that it took much encouraging - I've always been the "I can do it myself, Mommy" type). If I need help with something she'd go to hell and back without a second thought, but if I don't involve her in it, my business is my business.

Eh... For me I notice most how she knit-picks the parenting of my children. She thinks I am too "strict" and seems to have amnesia to the fact she literally beat my ass when I was that age. For instance, my son became grounded (no tv for two days) for not making his bed two days in a row. Then my mother comes over, spoils them rotten, and in front of them tells me I shouldn't be so hard on them. Really? And then she tells me I don't eat enough healthy foods. Healthy food to her is homemade fried chicken, rolls with a pound of butter on them, and green beans which normally would be healthy if she didn't cook them in a skillet with a stick of butter. (This is bad because it is ludicrous and annoying, but good because I do love me some fried chicken and tons of butter.

[Tisket]

Fortunately, BECAUSE I was raised that way, I have absolutely no problem telling her to fuck off. Having the need to tell her to fuck off is what makes me frown. Surely after thirty years of knowing someone, you'd actually KNOW them.

You know I love you very much BUT it almost sounds like you are the one that's upset that she doesn't agree with you. I could (and probably am) wrong but, reacting by telling her to fuck off might be why she acts surprised?

/Freud

[Gnome Rage]

IRRATIONAL RANTING BELOW

Fuck. Holidays. Whenever we have to go see my cousins, who I love and miss and wish I saw more often, my dad gets all one-uppy and we all have to be PERFECT. My dad called up the stairs and was like, we're leaving in an hour, make sure you have enough time to shower and get ready, wear a dresss! DO YOUR HAIR AND PUT ON MAKEUP TOO! Remember, best behavior.

What are we? Toddlers?! We're all adults, wtf is this best behavior shit. I'm pretty sure I could roll out of bed and go and my cousins wouldn't give a fuck, but my dad is obsessed with out-doing my uncle in some way shape or form. fhslkshafjklhadkadahlkshsdsksaldaslkdh

[4a6c1]

IRRATIONAL RANTING BELOW

Fuck. Holidays. Whenever we have to go see my cousins, who I love and miss and wish I saw more often, my dad gets all one-uppy and we all have to be PERFECT. My dad called up the stairs and was like, we're leaving in an hour, make sure you have enough time to shower and get ready, wear a dresss! DO YOUR HAIR AND PUT ON MAKEUP TOO! Remember, best behavior.

What are we? Toddlers?! We're all adults, wtf is this best behavior shit. I'm pretty sure I could roll out of bed and go and my cousins wouldn't give a fuck, but my dad is obsessed with out-doing my uncle in some way shape or form. fhslkshafjklhadkadahlkshsdsksaldaslkdh

Lol. THIS. But mine literally tells me what not to wear and explains it logically with regard to the colors everyone else is wearing. I'm concerned he has my outfits memorized. :-/

[DCSL]

You know I love you very much BUT it almost sounds like you are the one that's upset that she doesn't agree with you. I could (and probably am) wrong but, reacting by telling her to fuck off might be why she acts surprised?

/Freud

I thought about it but I disagree. In this case that I've told you guys about, it's not the fact that she disagrees with me that makes me angry. Disagreeing with me is not a problem. It's when she tried to take away my autonomy, my personal choice (and my health issue is VERY personal.. it doesn't get more personal than a girl's vagina) that I got upset. I'm not endangering my health by postponing the appointment a couple of weeks. My mental health is not impaired other than some short term memory loss and hormonal upsets due to treatments. She has no right to make decisions for me when I have made my (very) personal preferences clear.

To expand on it for Rojo, our disagreements that she always seems shocked by are usually small things. Details. She's always surprised when I'm not into the same music, the same clothing styles, the same political opinions. I'm polite about it, normally, but I'm not quiet about my personal opinions. There's no way she could not know these things about me as I know them about her. But it always surprises her. Worse than being surprised, she is then convinced that when I grow up, I'll come 'round to her way of thinking on whatever the issue is, implying that my opinion is immature, ill-thought, ignorant or just downright wrong but someday I will inevitably grow out of it. I find this insulting and hurtful. Hurtful most of all because my own mother doesn't know who I am after thirty years and doesn't seem to care to until I'm just like her. THEN I'll be an acceptable human being.

Disagreement is fine. Belittling me about my choices is less fine but whatever. Trying to take away my personal choices instead of just disagreeing with them is not at all fine with me.

[Androidpk]

Is she still planning on moving near you?

[Suppressed Poet]

I thought about it but I disagree. In this case that I've told you guys about, it's not the fact that she disagrees with me that makes me angry. Disagreeing with me is not a problem. It's when she tried to take away my autonomy, my personal choice (and my health issue is VERY personal.. it doesn't get more personal than a girl's vagina) that I got upset. I'm not endangering my health by postponing the appointment a couple of weeks. My mental health is not impaired other than some short term memory loss and hormonal upsets due to treatments. She has no right to make decisions for me when I have made my (very) personal preferences clear.

To expand on it for Rojo, our disagreements that she always seems shocked by are usually small things. Details. She's always surprised when I'm not into the same music, the same clothing styles, the same political opinions. I'm polite about it, normally, but I'm not quiet about my personal opinions. There's no way she could not know these things about me as I know them about her. But it always surprises her. Worse than being surprised, she is then convinced that when I grow up, I'll come 'round to her way of thinking on whatever the issue is, implying that my opinion is immature, ill-thought, ignorant or just downright wrong but someday I will inevitably grow out of it. I find this insulting and hurtful. Hurtful most of all because my own mother doesn't know who I am after thirty years and doesn't seem to care to until I'm just like her. THEN I'll be an acceptable human being.

Disagreement is fine. Belittling me about my choices is less fine but whatever. Trying to take away my personal choices instead of just disagreeing with them is not at all fine with me.

Just remember she is your mom. You only have one and even if you disagree I promise she loves and cares about you. She wouldn't book a flight to see you and (though wrong) try to force you to keep your scheduled doctor's appointment if she didn't love you for who you are. You can respectfully disagree, stand your ground, and express in a polite but firm manner that you have different opinions/views. There is a graceful way to show your independence. (Forgive my bluntness here) It seems to me that based on what you wrote that you are acting like a crazy hormonal period-dripping immature rebellious bitchy teenager by ranting and telling her to fuck off. This could also be the reason she thinks it is a phase, based on your attitude.

[Latrinsorm]

(and my health issue is VERY personal.. it doesn't get more personal than a girl's vagina)

What about a man and his batting average???

[Delias]

Just remember she is your mom. You only have one and even if you disagree I promise she loves and cares about you. She wouldn't book a flight to see you and (though wrong) try to force you to keep your scheduled doctor's appointment if she didn't love you for who you are. You can respectfully disagree, stand your ground, and express in a polite but firm manner that you have different opinions/views. There is a graceful way to show your independence. (Forgive my bluntness here) It seems to me that based on what you wrote that you are acting like a crazy hormonal period-dripping immature rebellious bitchy teenager by ranting and telling her to fuck off. This could also be the reason she thinks it is a phase, based on your attitude.

You are clearly fucking retarded. You need to spend some more time with manipulative and meddling parents, I think. This is the obvious advice from someone who has no idea what they are talking about.

[Suppressed Poet]

You are clearly fucking retarded. You need to spend some more time with manipulative and meddling parents, I think. This is the obvious advice from someone who has no idea what they are talking about.

Clearly.

You are so right. What was I thinking? Telling you parents to fuck off sends the message you are a responsible adult and will do wonders to strengthen family relationships. Let me know how that works out for you. I bow down to your intellectual superiority.

Had you had read my earlier post, you would see that I have a meddling mother as well.