I've made my Presidential decision

[Parkbandit]

Bill Cosby tells it like it should be. I am going to vote for him.

I HAVE DECIDED TO BECOME A WRITE-IN CANDIDATE.
HERE IS MY PLATFORM:

(1) Press 1 for English is immediately banned. English is the
official language; speak it or wait at the border until you can.

(2) We will immediately go into a two year isolationist posture to
straighten out the country's attitude. NO imports, no exports.
We will use the 'Walmart' policy, 'If we ain't got it, you don't
need it.'

(3) When imports are allowed, there will be a 100% import tax on it.

(4) All retired military personnel will be required to man one
of our many observation towers on the southern border.
(six month tour) They will be under strict orders not to fire
on SOUTHBOUND aliens.

(5) Social security will immediately return to its original state.
If you didn't put nuttin in, you ain't gettin nuttin out. The
president nor any other politician will not be able to touch it.

(6) Welfare - Checks will be handed out on Fridays at the end of
the 40 hour school week and the successful completion of
urinalysis and a passing grade.

(7) Professional Athletes --Steroids - The FIRST time you check
positive you're banned for life.

(8) Crime - We will adopt the Turkish method, the first time you
steal, you lose your right hand. There is no more life sentences.
If convicted, you will be put to death by the same method you
chose for your victim; gun, knife, strangulation, etc.

(9) One export will be allowed; Wheat, The world needs to eat.
A bushel of wheat will be the exact price of a barrel of oil.

(10) All foreign aid using American taxpayer money will
immediately cease, and the saved money will pay off the
national debt and ultimately lower taxes. When disasters
occur around the world, we'll ask the American people
if they want to donate to a disaster fund, and each citizen
can make the decision whether it's a worthy cause.

(11) The Pledge of Allegiance will be said every day at school
and every day in Congress.

(12) The National Anthem will be played at all appropriate
ceremonies, sporting events, outings, etc.

Sorry if I stepped on anyone's toes but a vote for me will get you
better than what you have, and better than what you're gonna get.
Thanks for listening, and remember to write in my name on the ballot in
November.
God Bless America!!!!!!!!!!!



Bill Cosby!!!!!!!!

[Khariz]

Bill Cosby tells it like it should be. I am going to vote for him.

I HAVE DECIDED TO BECOME A WRITE-IN CANDIDATE.
HERE IS MY PLATFORM:

(1) Press 1 for English is immediately banned. English is the
official language; speak it or wait at the border until you can.

(2) We will immediately go into a two year isolationist posture to
straighten out the country's attitude. NO imports, no exports.
We will use the 'Walmart' policy, 'If we ain't got it, you don't
need it.'

(3) When imports are allowed, there will be a 100% import tax on it.

(4) All retired military personnel will be required to man one
of our many observation towers on the southern border.
(six month tour) They will be under strict orders not to fire
on SOUTHBOUND aliens.

(5) Social security will immediately return to its original state.
If you didn't put nuttin in, you ain't gettin nuttin out. The
president nor any other politician will not be able to touch it.

(6) Welfare - Checks will be handed out on Fridays at the end of
the 40 hour school week and the successful completion of
urinalysis and a passing grade.

(7) Professional Athletes --Steroids - The FIRST time you check
positive you're banned for life.

(8) Crime - We will adopt the Turkish method, the first time you
steal, you lose your right hand. There is no more life sentences.
If convicted, you will be put to death by the same method you
chose for your victim; gun, knife, strangulation, etc.

(9) One export will be allowed; Wheat, The world needs to eat.
A bushel of wheat will be the exact price of a barrel of oil.

(10) All foreign aid using American taxpayer money will
immediately cease, and the saved money will pay off the
national debt and ultimately lower taxes. When disasters
occur around the world, we'll ask the American people
if they want to donate to a disaster fund, and each citizen
can make the decision whether it's a worthy cause.

(11) The Pledge of Allegiance will be said every day at school
and every day in Congress.

(12) The National Anthem will be played at all appropriate
ceremonies, sporting events, outings, etc.

Sorry if I stepped on anyone's toes but a vote for me will get you
better than what you have, and better than what you're gonna get.
Thanks for listening, and remember to write in my name on the ballot in
November.
God Bless America!!!!!!!!!!!



Bill Cosby!!!!!!!!


Sweet. Voting for him too.

[Parkbandit]

I have no idea if it's real or not.. I just got it from my crazy Father in Law via email.

[Stanley Burrell]

I wonder if he notices his soap box was made in China?

[Trouble]

I have no idea if it's real or not.. I just got it from my crazy Father in Law via email.

Lol yeah sounds a little too out there for him, but I do respect most of the ideas.

Unfortunately it would never happen.

[CrystalTears]

http://www.snopes.com/politics/soapbox/platform.asp

Snopes doesn't allow copy/paste of their articles, or I would have posted it.

[Ashliana]

CT, they can't stop you from copy/pasting. Well, they can try.


Bill of Write-Ins


Claim: Comedian Bill Cosby's issued his platform as a write-in candidate in the 2008 Presidential election.

Status: False.

Example: [Collected via e-mail, July 2008]

I HAVE DECIDED TO BECOME A WRITE-IN CANDIDATE. HERE IS MY PLATFORM:

( 1.) Press 1 for English is immediately banned. English is the official language; speak it or wait at the border until you can.

( 2.) We will immediately go into a two year isolationist posture to straighten out the country's attitude. NO imports, no exports. We will use the 'Walmart' policy, 'If we ain't got it, you don't need it.'

( 3.) When imports are allowed, there will be a 100% import tax on it.

( 4.) All retired military personnel will be required to man one of our many observation towers on the southern border. (six month tour) They will be under strict orders not to fire on SOUTHBOUND aliens.

( 5.) Social security
will immediately return to its original state. If you didn't put nuttin in, you ain't gettin nuttin out. The president nor any other politician will not be able to touch it.

( 6.) Welfare - Checks will be handed out on Fridays at the end of the 40 hour school week and the successful completion of urinalysis and a passing grade.

( 7.) Professional Athletes - Steroids - The FIRST time you check positive you're banned for life.

( 8.) Crime - We will adopt the Turkish method, the first time you steal, you lose your right hand. There is no more life sentences. If convicted, you will be put to death by the same method you chose for your victim; gun, knife, strangulation, etc.

( 9.) One export will be allowed...Wheat. The world needs to eat. A bushel of wheat will be the exact price of a barrel of oil.

(10.) All foreign aid using American taxpayer money will immediately cease, and the saved money will pay off the national debt and ultimately lower taxes. When disasters occur around the world, we'll ask the American people if they want to donate to a disaster fund, and each citizen can make the decision whether it's a worthy cause.

(11.) The Pledge of Allegiance will be said every day at school and every day in Congress.

(12.) The National Anthem will be played at all appropriate ceremonies, sporting events, outings, etc.

Sorry if I stepped on anyone's toes, but a vote for me will get you better than what you have, and better than what you're gonna get. Thanks for listening, and remember to write in my name on the ballot in November. God Bless America!!!!!!!!!!!

Bill Cosby!!!!!!!!

Origins: We don't know who authored this reactionary "platform" for a write-in presidential candidate, but we feel safe in avowing that it was not entertainer Bill Cosby. When Mr. Cosby speaks out politically, it is generally to urge blacks to take responsibility for making the most of educational opportunities and eschewing choices that limit their potential for success. Immigration, imports, foreign aid, steroid use in sports, and insufficient recitation of the Pledge of Allegiance and the national anthem are not his political bêtes noires. (This "platform" has also been attributed to comedian George Carlin, and it's equally out of tune with that late comedian's commonly expressed political views.)

[CrystalTears]

Oh, for whatever reason I wasn't able to scroll over and highlight the article to copy it. Thanks for capturing it.

[Ashliana]

Hehe. They try to block it. In IE, go to: Tools, Internet Options, Security, Custom Level, under "Scripting" at the bottom, you'll see ACTIVE SCRIPTING. Hit disable. This prevents the Javascript they're using from stopping you trying to copy/paste it.

[Stanley Burrell]

http://www.snopes.com/politics/soapbox/platform.asp

Snopes doesn't allow copy/paste of their articles, or I would have posted it.

Thanks.

Hitler.

[CrystalTears]

Awesome, thank you. There's very little I'm able to screw with as far as security settings on my work computer, but that worked. Unfortunately our products depend on Java so that's not something I can do. I'll just bug you to post it for me. :tongue:

[Apathy]

Hehe. They try to block it. In IE, go to: Tools, Internet Options, Security, Custom Level, under "Scripting" at the bottom, you'll see ACTIVE SCRIPTING. Hit disable. This prevents the Javascript they're using from stopping you trying to copy/paste it.

Or download Firefox + Noscript.

[TheEschaton]

LOL at all the retards who thought that might actually be what Bill Cosby thinks about our current state of affairs.