Thread for things that blew your mind today.

[WRoss]

Either someone's a HUGE Dexter fan, or they're going to have to fake like they are to the cops.

Nope. Just do a lot of reading. That was me just summarizing what I read about some serial killer. I need to look up where I found it.

[diethx]

And you were talking about running for office. haha.

[Androidpk]

And you were talking about running for office. haha.

He suddenly just became more electable.

[WRoss]

And you were talking about running for office. haha.

One day. Not anytime soon.

[Mighty Nikkisaurus]

In order to properly dispose of a body, you are going to need a few things. First, a ton of baking soda. The smell is going to be horrible, so you don't want it getting to the streets. You'll need to cover all your vents in plastic wrap. You can just put up a few layers of saran wrap and then very neatly use duct tape to make an air tight seal. Next, put bowls of baking soda near every window, door, and vent. You want roughly a pound of baking soda for each, but a few pounds at the front door. Now that that's done, lets get rid of this body. You need to drain it of all blood as soon as possible. This will slow down the decay and help with the stench. Contrary to popular belief, draining blood from the neck is not the best method. The femoral artery works much better. Put the body in the bathtub, propping the feet up at one end the and the torso leaning against the back of the bathtub. Think of a reclining chair. That's the position you want. Now, slice the thigh from knee to buttocks, cutting the femoral artery length wise. Once the body starts draining, you'll need to add a ton of bleach to keep the smell down as well as maintaining a clean environment. It will take roughly a day to fully drain. I'd recommend sealing the room until it's fully drained. After draining, they body will be much easier and cleaner to work with.

Now that the blood is drained, you can easily hack the body into pieces. You'll need a mallet, preferably rubber coated (you can melt the rubber later to dispose of DNA), some sort of wedge, again rubber coated, and then a knife. Don't use anything you'll be attached to, as this will be the last time you use them. Carving knives work well. Cut the flesh away from around the joins, exposing the bone. Cut away any tendons and cartilage that is exposed. Use the wedge and mallet to sever the joints. After this the body will be easier to move. I'd go on, but I've likely scared some of you.

Is it wrong that while reading this my immediate thought was "Wait, then how did Krieger manage to drain and chop up the Italian PM in like an hour in La Scandalo?"

[Tisket]

My suspicions have been confirmed...the PC harbors some sick fuckers.

[Mighty Nikkisaurus]

My suspicions have been confirmed...the PC harbors some sick fuckers.

Just in case you were wondering too, I concluded he must have done rapid chest compressions after opening the arteries to speed up the draining process.

[4a6c1]

Obvious when you actually look at the skull, but if you raped and murdered a child with their baby teeth, decapitated the corpse, and then threw the head into a plastic bin ($12.93 Walmart http://www.walmart.com/ip/Sterilite-...Quart/19868993) containing beetles in order to clean the meat/blood/sinew off of the head, the baby teeth wouldn't be visible when you removed the skull for a few weeks later.

wtf

[Stanley Burrell]

Someone planted something in my plants. Really quickly. Then they done pranked my ass and told me it was blooming the way it was supposed to. And no one told me it was just a twig with some flowers on it and everyone pretended to be impressed and I was mindfucked.

[Androidpk]

God Bless America

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature...&v=ul4CZrnEFxU