
Originally Posted by
Gnome Rage
I mean, I don't -- and I don't want this to come off as hostile at all, so please don't read it that way. (and this is addressed to everyone on the subject)
Deciding between my happiness, mental-health, and overall life-satisfaction and that of someone who I still care deeply for is not something I ever wanted to do and it is extremely hard. I lost the respect of a lot of people when I made a choice to put myself first, and I am okay with that because I know that absolutely no one can understand how it feels to have to make that choice unless they actually have to make it. Each time that decision is weighed it is by a different person with different life experiences, expectations, hopes, dreams, aspirations and morals, making every reaction to the situation different. I couldn't do it, maybe that makes me a bad person, or maybe I didn't want to spend the next 10 years of my life the way I spent the first 10 or the 2 prior. Considering I have been a caregiver to someone severely riddled with cancer since I was able to push the buttons on the microwave, I wanted to spend some short part of my life learning who I am when I am not in the shadow of someone else's immenent death, and the constant stress that puts on you.