Russia Just Invaded Ukraine

[Methais]

Dogs are property. Hunting dogs are tools, not pets. This tool was no good at her job. She killed other people's chickens and tried to bite a person. When we remember Cricket, we won't think of her happily chasing birds; instead, we will lament her inability or unwillingness to live up to her domesticated genetic imperative of obedience. With AI and genetic editing technology, we should be able to design more compliant tools or, failing that, replace all of them with robots -- preferably with flamethrowers.

When we remember ClydeR, we won't think of him, at least before his TDS went into overdrive, being Great Value Stephen Colbert; instead, we will lament his inability to figure out how to buy cold cuts at the grocery store on his own until he was in his 30s when his mommy showed him how to interact with people in person in order to make a transaction.

But only after the word "retard" comes to mind first.