[Troll Lair, Jaeden's room]
Dim light casts its yellow rays across a dusty computer room, the smell of stale pizza and buffalo sauce permeating the humid air. The pine shade clacks against the window from the light breeze. It is obvious that this room has seen better days, but the high bookshelves and rows of withered old novels give the setting an air of sophistication.
You also see a worn leather computer chair, a box of tissues, and a maroon clay ashtray.
Also here: The Troll Jaeden who is sitting.
>sit
You sit down.
>
Jaeden beams!
>
Jaeden says, “Ember I thought you weren't a troll..well welcome to the lair. the bathroom is on the right, it kinda stinks if you can clean it up again. do you like chicken bones? got a lot of them lying around. in fact, here you go hun..”
>smile
You smile.
>
Jaeden drops a large chicken bone.
>get bone
get bone
You pick up a chicken bone.
>get bone
You are already holding a large chicken bone.
You are already holding a large chicken bone.
>act munches attentively
(Ember munches attentively)
>eat bone
You can’t do that.
>
Jaeden snickers.
>
Jaeden exclaims, “i've got to say, you've been doing a decent job so far. furiously typing away with random, excessively analytical posts about my character, full of thoughtfulness and insight that regular posters couldn’t resist reading with great intensity!”
>nod
You nod.
>
Jaeden exclaims, “this is going to be a great relationship. Rather than a thoughtful response, I figured I’d do something cheap and pathetic like stun you in game. By the nature of your thread, I knew you had defected to my side, so as the trolling entrepreneur you know I am, this vivid scheme dawned on me within seconds!”
>act undulates, her pale body writing in her computer chair methodically as her piercings clack against her teeth eerily
(Ember undulates, her pale body writing in her computer chair methodically as her piercings clack against her teeth eerily)
>
Jaeden exclaims, “I stun you, you post up a new thread (or two), possibly something in the Off-Topic section, of course the thread filled to the brim with a new declarations of hatred, complete roasts of my religion and character, topped off with several blasphemous photos and implied threats of physical violence and moral defamation!”
>howl
nod
You throw back your head and howl!
>nod
You nod.
You nod.
>
Jaeden exclaims, “A jolly good show! Perhaps you can rally a group and stun or kill me. Maybe you’ll accomplish it yourself for bonus points! The threads will pile up, posters won’t be able to resist following every single page to the letter, and thus, the masses will entertained and subsequently undulate with a new fervor. Fat rolls will quiver, posters will be negatively repped, and for some, depression will set in. Some, confused by our cacophony of trolling, subtle proselytizing, and subsequent unabated blaspheming, will fire off volley after volley of epic nerdrage, topped off unceremoniously by a new thread announcing their total disgust with the direction the boards are taking, and an insincere pledge to “quit” for a while in protest. Then, once they come back, we can leave a positive rep comment for them alluding to the whole scenario and reminding them to not lose hope, as the internetz can still be won!”
>hug jae
You hug Jaeden.
>
Jaeden exclaims, “so we’re in agreement. Very well. Chop chop, missy. It’s Monday after all. People are at work and they need something to fucking read!”
>stand
You stand back up.
>salute jaeden
out
Last edited by IorakeWarhammer; 08-02-2010 at 12:41 PM.
Jaeden just actually wrote GSIV fanfic about himself.
This thread has gotten so fucking terrible that it wraps back around to awesome.
That was weird as shit. Notice how she didn't get to speak or anything, she pretty much just got to munch attentively on a bone. What was with her piercings clicking against her teeth?
I'm getting kind of a Gor-type sense from this log but he didn't post how far away they were from eachother.
In any event. Fucking amazing.
So I'm curious. Does Vanguard stand up for Jaeden if people decide its time for him to die? All faction crap aside?
no plans to attack Ember in the future just wanted to stir a little controversy on this dreary Monday morning...