Journal of a Priestess.

[Rue]

But happiness isn't for us. We have a greater calling. That way has been lost to us.

How true this was, but there are no regrets and the time was well spent.

I am at least 4 entries behind and sleep still wishes to over power my mind. So skipping all that is past and making a scribble of notes…

In an effort to release Morvule

::: a small drawing of religious symbols follow:::

Accusations that are too serious to ignore, must follow through.

::useless doodles decorate the page before another entry is sloppily written::

Made him flinch ~~~
someone made me flinch and I hated myself for it
another robbery... @}-'--{-,--
must find away to cure myself

::a smudge of ink pools at the bottom of the page as if someone fell asleep with the freshly dipped quill in hand :::

[Rue]

Tick tick tick. What is this sound always in the back of my mind. Tick tick tick tick. . . it is not important .... but still it precedes... tick tick ticktickticktick. . . tick tock the mouse ran up the clock, the clock struck midnight and the ticking still didn't stop. Tick ticktick. . . Tick tock everything is nothing but something to mock. Tic la tee friggen da tock. . .Palastra tick basilica tock collection tick light tock darkness tick vision tock the mouse ran up the clock and it isn't going to stop before it is suppose to, not before its time. Time is really the source of its ticking. I know it is. Time to soon, to late, not enough time but the constant reminder of ticking echo’s out over the endless waves of time. Whose hands are those anyways pointing to the figures that mark the ticking and the tocking. More then a few watch while the under tone of silence is deafening to the many voices repeating over and over the tickticktick tsk tick tsk tick tsk ticking.

This makes no sense regardless of the time. Just can't seem to put my finger on it. 4 different situations keep rippling into the other and all I do is watch. Who would I tell anyhow? . .. tick tick tick.

[Rue]

Fash'lo'nae brought Eorgina the news that Koar and Lumnis were to be wed. She did not rant or tear apart the walls of Li'aerion as she felt inclined to do. In fact, she said not a word. She only nodded, then indicated with a graceful wave of her hand that Fash'lo'nae was to leave her. As he did so, her servants ushered the Arkati guests residing in Li'aerion out and closed the great doors. Then all the Elven servants within the manse were thrown over the parapet of the eastern balcony, until at last Eorgina was alone. And alone she stayed for years.

[SpunGirl]

OOC question - does Teslas still hang out with Foxs?

-K

[Drisco]

Okay your now my number one favourite poster Rue.

Sean2 you need to step it up.

[Rue]

Wandering the streets of the fest watching the winged ones dance in delight at all the sights. At first it was difficult to stroll among so many faces but as the days go by it grows a little easier and my bitterness is not so subtle. I managed to gain some insight as well, to something that I wasn't exactly sure about either or looking for. However, all it did was make me wonder if I somehow missed something along the way. Did I want something so bad that I seen what I wanted to see? Could I have been that wrong about someone? After that last meeting, does it matter?

Sitting in shops waiting on merchants gives a person a lot of time to think and contemplate situations. I have managed to hear a few visions of my path but question the intentions and the source of these visions. Echo words constantly whisper beneath the ticking sound. . .

The other Warriors of the Outland Basilica have been made aware of you. Just as I too have been made aware. May tranquility and serenity find you in the pursuit of your own desires and Elanthia protect and watch over you. But remember . . . Patience we know, however her patience, Mistress Eorgina, is not as merciful at times when she is displeased.

Perhaps the diamond-set silver dragon's egg that has come into my possession holds the answer and I can prolong facing Eorgina herself for a little longer.

Note, I have learned sitting in shops for long lengths of time isn't the answer and one must get on so called list in order to gain work from a merchant.

[Rue]

An aspect of a shadow, is part of the unconscious mind which is mysterious and often disagreeable to the conscious mind, but it is also relatively close to the conscious mind. The shadow is instinctive and irrational, but is not necessarily evil even when it might appear to be so. It can be both ruthless in conflict and empathetic in friendship. It is important as a source of hunches, for understanding of one's own more inexplicable actions and attitudes (and of others' reactions), and for learning how to accept and integrate the more problematic or troubling aspects of personality. Some shadows may appear in dreams and visions in various forms and often as a feared or despised being, which may act either as an adversary or as a servant or as fate. It is possible that it might form into something with dark features or even be featureless to a person of any race, since it represents an old ancestral aspect of the mind. The shadow's appearance and role depend greatly on the experience you embrace within it. Interactions with the shadow in dreams may shed darkness on one's state of mind and to give over to a conversation with the shadow may help indicate a conflicting desires or intentions even if you do not wish to admit it to yourself. Identification with the figure may mean that one has an unacknowledged difference; a difference which could point to a rejection of the illuminating qualities of ego-consciousness.

Reflecting on the word evil. . . this is argued to be a perception of view. It can be defined as an extreme self-serving behavior with a lack of consciences, as well as an inability to empathize with others and to restrain oneself from, or to feel remorse for, harm personally caused to others. Is this the definition universal of the lands? There is to much debate over this for me to make heads or tails of. And will just have to trust in my own idealism.

A note about the fest and dreams haunting~
I found there to be an element in the wild revelry of festival and drunkenness, but, most importantly, in music. The combination of these elements in one art form gives birth to tragedy. Making a chorus of diversity to any argument that the illusion of culture can be wiped away with a primordial image to those willing to participate. If you can make them imagine that they are who they want to be, and make them feel like natural geniuses you can also make them believe in a state of mind they can dream /vision themselves the same energy they're embodying.
The vision of the goddess, the dark Queen, who appears before her followers to reveal my place is still unclear. All involved become the plot developed in a dream vision, the essence of which is the ecstatic dismembering of the goddess and of the rituals to come, of the inseparable ecstasy and suffering of my own existence.

Chalk another deform mark on the wall of more pointless ramblings to an over worked mind that can't seem to see anything clearly. To many shadows cloak the corners of my mind.

[Rue]

Destiny is defined as a predetermined course of events often held in the hands of irresistible power from our Arkati. It is their will, principle, and determining motives that causes action and reaction to all things in general. It is they who can see what is to come and what things are to be or even to predict events happening as they do. It is inevitable and often a predictable outcome to most paths, but all walks are still subject to many conditions that can or can't lead to ones end. The possibility will always remain that your whole destiny is meant to be a disaster. Regardless, it is a final outcome to what path you are meant to travel. The Arkati are extending their fingers on more then a few plains, causing ripples to echo over one another for some fate that I can not see, even if it seems predictable and played out already.

FATE implies an inevitable and usually an adverse outcome.
DESTINY implies something foreordained and often suggests a great or noble course or end.
LOT suggesting blind chance
PORTION implying the apportioning of good and evil
DOOM distinctly implies a grim or calamitous fate

I can't believe how every one argues the point of fate and destiny, when there is proof in all actions and reactions. An example of this is the fact that everyone has felt something overly or unpleasantly familiar before. Destinies rippling echo's brush against each other with various centers fulfilling a predetermined design. Of course there is always that chaos factor, or if you want you can call it a free agent, or even an unknown mystery that keeps it all interesting. Similar to a rock being thrown into the ripples causing disruption or throwing in a wild card into the crowd that constantly has you on edge. . . not the same way that inferno ticking does in the back of my mind, but something with an edge so sharp I can predict I will inevitably impale myself upon it.

This is to reflect upon three ripples I am currently experiencing that will somehow all tie together. How do I know that? I don't, its just one of those mysterious.
But the timing, the situation, and with all the walks lined up, you can almost see it unfold before it happens.

[Rue]

It stalks the night,
It stalks the day,
It seeks out life and whisks it away,
It's known as death and other things too. But it's all the same, what matters is you. How do you see it? What does it mean? It's best if you know, for Death is unseen. It can take you at day, It can take you at night, knowing death well, can lend you some insight to the depths of doom.
The passage to death, is always unclear and it's best to know that you're very near.
For death is at hand.
It is for us all, know it's face well. Don't stumble and fall but think hard on it and know that it's near.
The meaning of life will become all that much clearer and that is to live for your hearts desire and to burn with fire.
A fire for life to live for each day, to reach for your dreams and goals, no matter what people say.
Live for the moment, and die for it too. For its the moment that counts; It and you.

The Temple has called me back to focus on my service and re instated my original knight as my keeper. A human with Dark Elven traits of all things. I have grown much since he last saw me. It seems timing is everything, and the once traveled path has been shrouded in darkness so I might return to the original one. Each day he keeps watch over me, I wonder if his duty has not become more of a personal matter. Sharing the story of his path that lead him up to this point of his life, makes me wonder if I am not his Fate.

I have not seen hide, nor hair of Lanielle and hope she is well. I have looked for her more then a few times without luck. Same with Linthral though I believe they did not reach the same fate but merely took turns that do not involve me any longer.

Attended a Mystery Ball put on by Rone. my knight in tow of course. It was very well done and enjoyable. I really do need to learn to throw caution to the winds of darkness if I am ever to gain key sleuth skills.

Tick tocking beat has slowed down at least to match the beating of my heart instead of matching the racing of my pulse within my viens holding back my blood thirst...
Oh yes before I forget a side note, I was ... bitten by some wench. My knight did not take kindly to the act and protected me well, but it did leave a bruise on my neck, the puncture wounds barely breaking the skin. I felt odd for some time afterwards however. I am sure it is nothing and not even worth making note of, but just in case. . . it is noted.

[Rue]

As I sit here, slowly closing my eyes, I take another deep breath and feel the wind pass through my body. Prays escape my lips softly asking the Dark Queen to protect the ones who hold her near and to cradle the flames that consume our souls. I can't stop myself from asking the familiar questions while I pray to her. Where do we go from here? What should I do when I just don't know? Why do I dream when my thoughts mean nothing but to follow my fate? When will I learn to control it all? Please O dark Queen Eorgina give me the vision to show me the way. Show me the way. . .

Embracing the darkness I wait and know the ticking goes on.

My path continues a little steadier, the temple work begins to consume some time. A request to convert has been presented to me and my knight by a pair of sisters. These sister appear to be (by all possible research) just the opposite of what they desire. My knight is willing and I might of been as well, but the conversation I held with my teacher not to long before this gave me reason to pause. I wonder if there is some truth to his concerns. What does my teacher know? He hides in Icemule from the rest of the world and its affairs. Such affairs as the inquisitor within in Sol Haven. Now that was an interesting experience. It gave me a torn feeling about the Imperial. The tyranny of it was admirable.
The inquisitor managed to gain his answers and only two people were jailed. One other should of been, but he did prevail with some interesting chaos factors (which I will return to after). I was not present, when the Empress was assassinate. The scene though was portrayed clearly to any that stood within ear shot to hear it as it was told to inquisitor.

"The Empress' procession arrived here on a night such as this one.
There was a stage...there" the human male that was being questioned pointed towards a direction before he continued without giving much to thought to what he was saying, "What transpired at first was as one would expect of an imperial procession gracing itself upon the city. The crowd was rather sizeable giving way to some commotion as an announcement was in the process of being made. Baron Malwind was...there."
The human male then pointed northwards from where we stood, never losing a train of thought as he continued on with the events he witnessed. “He was announcing her arrival. She had just begun speaking when it happened." He paused only for a moment before saying "A figure...in the bay, fired a single crossbow bolt, directly at the Empress"

Inquisitor interrupted to ask, "In the bay, you say?"

However the human male did not seem the least disturbed, only replied a simple "Yes." glancing westward before returning his gaze to the Inquisitor "I know the bay well."
The inquisitor would not be put off by the tone from the human male and dryly said something to the effect that the speaker did have that air about him. The human male still continued waggling his tongue how After that...he remember little else. How it was chaos and how he immediately went to the skiffs to attempt to find the assassin.

About this point the inquisitor seem to loose interest in the conversation he was having as well as with the very folks that had gathered to watch, he simply wandered off.
The chaos factor the horrible slinking creature made was the fact that the Empress could of possibly not been the Empress with as much make-up as she had on and with the distance of her viewing. I wonder if anyone else caught that little insinuation.

Side note to show there is still a whimisical side to me. I attended a scavenger hunt at Silverwood Manor. There was a list of twenty items we had 30 minutes to retrieve. My Duty outweighed my attendance and I stopped to raise. This along with the getting lost while retrieving one of the items, made me 10 minutes late. The other entries gracefully allowed me to still be entered. I tied for second place in points and won a beautiful parasol.

Note also 3 new ripples move from another center.