{Explitive deleted} rant.

[Keller]

Someone sent this to me and I felt it was somewhat clever. I understand it will piss some off -- and I know some of it could be seen from a different perspective. I'm sharing it because it made ME laugh, enjoy.

"Fuck the South. Fuck 'em. We should have let them go when they wanted to leave. But no, we had to kill half a million people so they'd stay part of our special Union. Fighting for the right to keep slaves - yeah, those are states we want to keep. And now what do we get? We're the fucking Arrogant Northeast Liberal Elite?
How about this for arrogant: the South is the Real America? The Authentic America. Really?

Cause we fucking founded this country, assholes. Those Founding Fathers you
keep going on and on about? All that bullshit about what you think they meant by the Second Amendment giving you the right to keep your assault weapons in the glove compartment because you didn't bother to read the first half of the fucking sentence? Who do you think those wig-wearing lacy-shirt sporting revolutionaries were? They were fucking blue-staters, dickhead. Boston? Philadelphia? New York? Hello? Think there might be a reason all the fucking monuments are up here in our backyard? No, No. Get the fuck out. We're not letting you visit the Liberty Bell and fucking Plymouth Rock anymore until you get over your real American selves and start respecting those other nine amendments. Who do you think those fucking stripes on the flag are for? Nine are for fucking blue states. And it would be 10 if those Vermonters had gotten their fucking Subarus together
and broken off from New York a little earlier. Get it? We started this shit, so don't get all uppity about how real you are you Johnny-come-lately "Oooooh I've been a state for almost a hundred years" dickheads. Fuck off.

Arrogant? You wanna talk about us Northeasterners being fucking arrogant?
What's more American than arrogance? Hmmm? Maybe horsies? I don't think so.
Arrogance is the fucking cornerstone of at it means to be American. And I wouldn't be so fucking arrogant if I wasn't paying for your fucking bridges, bitch.

All those Federal taxes you love to hate? It all comes from us and goes to you, so shut up and enjoy your fucking Tennessee Valley Authority electricity and your fancy highways that we paid for. And the next time Florida gets hit by a hurricane you can come crying to us if you want to, but you're the ones who built on a fucking swamp. "Let the Spanish keep
it, it’s a shithole," we said, but you had to have your fucking orange juice.

The next dickwad who says, "It’s your money, not the government's money" is
gonna get their ass kicked. Nine of the ten states that get the most federal fucking dollars and pay the least... can you guess? Go on, guess. That’s right, motherfucker, they're red states. And eight of the ten states that receive the least and pay the most? It’s too easy, asshole, they’re blue states. It’s not your money, assholes, it’s fucking our money. What was that Real American Value you were spouting a minute ago? Self reliance? Try this for self reliance: buy your own fucking stop signs, assholes.

Let’s talk about those values for a fucking minute. You and your Southern values can bite my ass because the blue states got the values over you fucking Real Americans every day of the goddamn week. Which state do you think has the lowest divorce rate you marriage-hyping dickwads? Well? Can you guess? It’s fucking Massachusetts, the fucking center of the gay marriage universe. Yes, that’s right, the state you love to tie around
the neck of anyone to the left of Strom Thurmond has the lowest divorce rate in
the fucking nation. Think that’s just some aberration? How about this: 9 of the 10 lowest divorce rates are fucking blue states, asshole, and most are in the Northeast, where our values suck so bad. And where are the highest divorce rates? Care to fucking guess? 10 of the top 10 are fucking red-ass we're-so-fucking-moral states. And while Nevada is the worst, the Bible Belt is doing its fucking part.

But two guys making out is going to fucking ruin marriage for you? Yeah?
Seems like you're ruining it pretty well on your own, you little bastards. Oh, but that's ok because you go to church, right? I mean you do, right? Cause we fucking get to hear about it every goddamn year at election time. Yes, we're fascinated by how you get up every Sunday morning and sing, and then you're fucking towers of moral superiority. Yeah, that's a workable formula. Maybe us fucking Northerners don't talk about religion as much as you because we're not so busy sinning, hmmm? Ever think of that, you
self-righteous assholes? No, you're too busy erecting giant stone tablets of
the Ten Commandments in buildings paid for by the fucking Northeast Liberal
Elite. And who has the highest murder rates in the nation? It ain't us up here in the North, assholes.

Well this gravy train is fucking over. Take your liberal-bashing, federal-tax-leaching, confederate-flag-waving, holier-than-thou, hypocritical bullshit and shove it up your ass.

And no, you can't have your fucking convention in New York next time. Fuck off."

[Ebondale]

Wow. You said fuck 43 times in that post. :lol:

FUCKING OWNED!

[SayGoodbye]

Originally posted by Keller
"Let the Spanish keep
it, it’s a shithole," we said, but you had to have your fucking orange juice.


:lol:

This thread is awesome, it made me laugh so hard and totally made my day.

:unclesam:

Edited for: Yay 100 posts!

[Edited on 5-28-2005 by SayGoodbye]

[Artha]

I stopped reading when it said northerners founded the country. Virginia Dynasty ring a bell?

[DeV]

Someone snapped the fuck off.

[War Angel]

http://www.tonyrogers.com/news/images/howard_dean_crazy2.jpg

Classic Dean Scream (http://www.tonyrogers.com/sounds/dean.mp3)

:lol:

[Back]

HAHAHAHA Fucking brilliant.

[Mistomeer]

I quit reading when it said the Civil War was about slavery.

[Trinitis]

Why do people feel the need to comment on when they stopped reading? Who cares? :bouncing:

[Latrinsorm]

Originally posted by Adredrin
Who cares?The obvious inference is that they are pointing out where the article's failings were.

p.s: Get Arkans!! C'mon!! :saint:

[Keller]

Originally posted by Mistomeer
I quit reading when it said the Civil War was about slavery.

Ths Civil War was about the price of wages. The price of wages was low due to the free labor in the south. Hence, ergo, the Civil War was about slavery.

[Ebondale]

Originally posted by Keller

Originally posted by Mistomeer
I quit reading when it said the Civil War was about slavery.

Ths Civil War was about the price of wages. The price of wages was low due to the free labor in the south. Hence, ergo, the Civil War was about slavery.

Actually the Civil War was about States rights vs. a strong central government. Slavery was a pretty unimportant issue to those that were fighting as the vast majority of the Confederate army were poor whites who were not land owners and could not afford slaves. :)

[Skirmisher]

The lower classes have almost always tended to make up the bulk of armies though, so that does not really mean much.

[Ebondale]

Originally posted by Skirmisher
The lower classes have almost always tended to make up the bulk of armies though, so that does not really mean much.

Well it does mean that they weren't slave owners. ;) If plantation owners weren't able to have slaves work at almost no cost to themselves then maybe some of these poor whites would have been able to get jobs working the fields for the rich whites. Then they wouldn't have been quite so poor as a a plantation owner would have been required to pay a white male fair wages.

That being said: Slavery was not the main focus of the Civil War

[Keller]

Originally posted by Ebondale

Originally posted by Keller

Originally posted by Mistomeer
I quit reading when it said the Civil War was about slavery.

Ths Civil War was about the price of wages. The price of wages was low due to the free labor in the south. Hence, ergo, the Civil War was about slavery.

Actually the Civil War was about States rights vs. a strong central government. Slavery was a pretty unimportant issue to those that were fighting as the vast majority of the Confederate army were poor whites who were not land owners and could not afford slaves. :)

According to every single civil war historian I've read the war was about the free labor of the south. Were the NYC draft riots about states right? No, they were about a bunch of starved Irishmen pissed off because they couldn't find jobs.

I understand that states rights it a trendy idea -- but the South seceded because the availability of free labor was restricted. That was the core issue of the civil war -- at least from my educational history.

[Mistomeer]

Originally posted by Keller

Originally posted by Mistomeer
I quit reading when it said the Civil War was about slavery.

Ths Civil War was about the price of wages. The price of wages was low due to the free labor in the south. Hence, ergo, the Civil War was about slavery.

Just like you stated in your original post, huh?
"Fighting for the right to keep slaves"

The war was more about economics and the relationship of such to federal/states rights.

Regardless, it wasn't about the moral issue of slavery. So I quit reading because of the implication that the North was on higher moral ground there.

[Warriorbird]

Eh. A larger percentage of them didn't have slaves.

That didn't make the war a matter of higher moral ground, but generally would make them on a higher moral ground in general.

[Mistomeer]

Originally posted by Warriorbird
Eh. A larger percentage of them didn't have slaves.

That didn't make the war a matter of higher moral ground, but generally would make them on a higher moral ground in general.

Right, up North at the time every African-American had the right to vote, had equal rights and the emancipation proclamation freed the slaves outside of the confederate states because the North cared that much about human rights.

/sarcasm

Both sides were shitheads about it at the time so there's really no need to try and argue otherwise. If you really want to discuss the high moral ground of the North with regards to human rights we could also mention things such as factory labor at the time and Grant's treatment of Jews (General Order No. 11). I'd say they both sucked when it came to human rights and neither had any moral ground to stand on.

[cookiemonster]

I read the whole damn thing.
Thanks teachers!
I read the whole damn thing in English.
Thanks Vets!

And though I'm a die hard southerner I thought it was funny.
Kinda like reading red-neck jokes.
Full of sh(t, but funny just the same.

[Back]

There is such a thing as a moral highground. I think Jesus used it well. In fact, he must have read Sun-Tzu.

:hump:

[Mistomeer]

Originally posted by Stanley Burrell
:hump:

No wonder you have 4000 + posts.

[ElanthianSiren]

LOL Hillarious.

What's funnier is that some in this thread think an article full of swearing and hissyfit should be historically accurate. It's not like we're laying out a case for the Civil war here; it's just one person's irrate bitching. -Kinda like reading a post by me when I'm on the rag.


-Melissa