A new start on a dead end road.

[Chadj]

[Edited on 7-28-2004 by Chadj]

[Edited on 7-31-2004 by Chadj]

[Drew2]

Yet you still have the internet and a computer...

[Wezas]

How are you going to pay for the movies, popcorn, & rubbers?

[Blazing247]

Wow, Canada sux. It takes about three months to get evicted here in the states.

On a side note, you are paying for Gemstone, the internet, and have a computer...I don't get it.

[DeV]

So, is Jessica paying for the date?

sidenote: If your fam is getting kicked out, that sucks. Hope everything works out for you.

[Bobmuhthol]

She is incredibly not good looking.

[Soulpieced]

She's about 3 years too old for Bob, anything under 13 is an old hag. She looks like a friend of mine from school..

Soulpieced :heart:'s redheads.

[Blazing247]

I think she's cute.

You'll quickly learn two lessons:

1) Never date a co-worker.
2) Attractive women aren't attracted to poor men.

As the song goes..."Girls don't like boys- girls like cars and money."

[Soulpieced]

So true Blazin, so true.

[Wezas]

http://www.hexe-svara.at/shop/jpg/70471.jpg

[Edited on 7-27-2004 by Wezas]

[Hulkein]

http://www.bullsballs.com/blue1.jpg

[Chadj]

Evening Realization

Well, I decided that I am not gonna jump into things, and I think I'm gonna cancel the date on friday. While I do like her, I am not 100% she likes me, and she is gonna be busy for the next 2 weeks.. she's going to a cottage. So I don't want to get too attatched, wait for her to come back, and have her tell me she ain't interested. So I'm gonna have a talk with her in about 5 minutes, and check it out. Sorta brings down my great mood, but I'm still in a good one, cause.. no idea. Just am. Good feelings, good times, happiness=le rocking.

[wow, I <3 these journal things. I'm totally gonna get a Livejournal]

[kheldarin]

Go get Xanga, hahaha.

[Artha]

Blogger's the bestest.

[DeV]

Originally posted by Artha
Blogger's the bestest. Yep.. just started one today.

[Chadj]

Exam

Well, today I had my exam. I was in summer school because I skipped an english class that was worth 30% of our final mark.. Which blows total ass. Anyways, so I write the exam today, and I think I did pretty good. I may just pass! Yay 4 me. It went slow, but at least I managed to get $30 worth of substance by the end of the day, while I only had a $5 on me when I walked in. Probably gonna have $70 cash for tomorrow, and we can afford groceries.. lucky us.

I havn't seen or heard from my father in 3 days... (this sort of thing has been goin on for 8 months). It's nothing real surprising to me. Nothing I don't expect. I'm a little angry that I'm outta GS untill I move, which blows, but I can handle that. However, I am very pissed that my mother continues to enable my father with this habit. Last night, she had me go to the store, to get a phone card for my fathers cell. I refused, but after a half hour of her begging me to go, I gave in. The amusing part is.. that it's MY cell phone. I have not seen it in 4 months.. My father stole it, and I get to go buy a phone card for it. So basically, my father is out for days and days not supporting the family in any way (actually, a large drain), and my mother can't afford groceries, yet she can spare her last $20 to buy him a phone card? Bullshit.

Today I was with Shay... Me and her were havin good times, but it gets harder and harder to forget about the shit goin on at home, without doin drugs. I havn't given in yet, but I know I probably will eventually. I've limited my drinking to two nights a week, and on only one of those nights will I allow myself to get drunk.. but drugs do a much better, and cheaper, job at forgetting things. Going from girl to girl just messing around won't get rid of this shit feeling of forboding I get at all times, knowing I have to step foot back into this house again. And I still don't know what the hell is going on with Jessica right now :(. So I guess today is a rather good day compared to my days lately.. I am pissed, and I am confused about the one relationship in my life that matters.. yet I'm somewhat still in a good mood from chillin with Shay. Anyways, probably have more to write later, and more random thoughts to drop.


[Edited on 7-28-2004 by Chadj]

[Latrinsorm]

Originally posted by Chadj
Today I was with ShayThat has got to be the worst coincidence ever. :(

[Soulpieced]

rofl, actually, the shay I was with today, is a rather sexy girl who exists. Not a text based female whom is actually a 14 year old ninja-boy.

.

ROFLMAO. It really is a shame that the body is an ICE age character.

[Edited on 7-28-2004 by Soulpieced]

[Chadj]

rofl, actually, the shay I was with today, is a rather sexy girl who exists. Not a text based female whom is actually a 14 year old ninja-boy.


<re-added.. was deleted when editing. Was editing to say: This is not a shot at anyone. Just a fact>

[Chadj]

Yeah... Cool

For the past half hour, someone has been explaining to me how God is the answer to all my problems. I totally understand people who believe in him, and I respect that, just as I respect any choice in religion, lifestyle etc.. However, he just preached to me for a half fuckin hour. Holy shit. THAT WAS ANNOYING. I totally wanted to say, "Umm, dood, I don't believe in him, and after a life like mine, I'm not gonna start any time soon. So take those bullshit stories about miraculous (sp?) healing, write em all down in a large, hard cover book, and shove that book up your ass.". I mean, holy damn.. I'm respectful and tolerant of anyones beliefs.. but when you try to force em on me for a half hour, it's annoying. So yeah. Mood for today: Annoyed.

I don't know wtf is going on with Jess anymore.. I totally won't see her for another two weeks, and from there we see how the relationship is going. Oh fuckin joy. My best friend is now dating someone I hate with a passion. Jody knows I hate Reggie (50% his name, 50% the fact that he is just stupid) and totally calls me up just after it happens, "OMG CHAD! GUESS WHAT! I'M GOING OUT WITH REGGIE!" so I decide to tell her "Reggie's a fag.". Yeah. Reggie didn't like that much. But at least she found it funny :thumbsup:. I also went to the pool today, and am going for every day for a couple weeks, as part of my football training for endurance. Also, it is part of my training to get a sexy tan. Yes. I want a tan. I'm too fuckin white.

Also, I am bored, tired, and my mother decided to ask "Why do you ALWAYS keep your backpack with you now? Do you have drugs in there?" "Umm, no mother, I don't." "Do I have to check?" "Go ahead." (I totally called her bluff.. I had 5 grams in my bag). So now she suspects me. Great. I totally lose, and then semi win, and then lose again today. Yay.


Also, I saw I, Robot. It's a good movie.

[Chadj]

And yes. I <3 the word 'also' at the moment.

[Red Devil]

hey, you live in ontario, i bought this zippo from some guy from ontario canada off ebay, like 2 days ago, his ebay name was mr_winner, can you go beat the shit out of him, get my fucking lighter, and mail it to me please?

PS: your life sucks ass, work 3 jobs, dump your family, you dont need them, as far as i know, they're just being leeches, get your own apartment, don't do drugs, continue selling unless you get heat on you, if you do, obviously get rid of that shit, once u got your own apartment, and have money, try and get another date with that crooked nose lady

[Artha]

Also, I am bored, tired, and my mother decided to ask "Why do you ALWAYS keep your backpack with you now? Do you have drugs in there?" "Umm, no mother, I don't." "Do I have to check?" "Go ahead." (I totally called her bluff.. I had 5 grams in my bag). So now she suspects me. Great. I totally lose, and then semi win, and then lose again today. Yay.

You need to think of better places to keep your drugs.

[Chadj]

I'll beat the shit out of him if you pay transportation +a $50 fee. I will supply myself with my own bat/glock. :)

Also, it's called a distorted picture.

Furthermore, 3 jobs sux. No.

[Chadj]

Originally posted by Artha
You need to think of better places to keep your drugs.

I have several places. However, when I am planning on selling, they go in my bag. And I am planning on selling 90% of the time that I go out. ;):)

[Edited on 7-29-2004 by Chadj]

[Chadj]

I'm goin to sleep. I owe $50 tomorrow. :(

Yea, I know how that shit goes with the pops. When I was younger I was pretty good at making money and saving it. I had like 5k in the bank at one point. Well anyway my dad pretty much drained that here and there "To help the family get by". (I did get my first computer tho) Anyway to the point, one time he asked for 1500 because he fell behind in the rent and the bills, and promised to pay it back whenever he had the chance. Well its been about 5-6 years, and come to find out that he got a check from the govt for about 10000 dollars not even a month after he took my shit. Yea, I sitll wanna kill that douche bag.

[Latrinsorm]

Originally posted by Chadj
However, he just preached to me for a half fuckin hour.He gave up after a measly half hour? Weak. I'm going to get his Overbearing Proselytizer card revoked.

[Red Devil]

Originally posted by RangerD1
Yea, I know how that shit goes with the pops. When I was younger I was pretty good at making money and saving it. I had like 5k in the bank at one point. Well anyway my dad pretty much drained that here and there "To help the family get by". (I did get my first computer tho) Anyway to the point, one time he asked for 1500 because he fell behind in the rent and the bills, and promised to pay it back whenever he had the chance. Well its been about 5-6 years, and come to find out that he got a check from the govt for about 10000 dollars not even a month after he took my shit. Yea, I sitll wanna kill that douche bag.

black ppl love to steal


[Edited on 7-29-2004 by Red Devil]

[Some Rogue]

And apparently barely literate morons like to post under the name Red Devil

[Chadj]

Well..

Well, pretty sure chances with Jess have gone from some to zero in a couple nights. For the past two nights, I have been high, and I have been worried about how things between me and Jess would work out. I totally was gonna just wait things out, see how they go, but I ended up fucking it up since I was stupid. This is the part where I figure I fucked shit up:

chad says:
k, i am gonna push this outta the way right now, k?
x Fall down until you hit the bottom (i'll catch you when you get there) x 12 more days says:
randy jut called me
x Fall down until you hit the bottom (i'll catch you when you get there) x 12 more days says:
huh?
chad says:
lol, nvm then
chad says:
cool!
x Fall down until you hit the bottom (i'll catch you when you get there) x 12 more days says:
no tell!
chad says:bah
chad says:
fine
chad says:
things aren't gonna get weird cause i was stupid and made it obvious that I had a little crush, are they? lol. I totally hate it when that happens.
x Fall down until you hit the bottom (i'll catch you when you get there) x 12 more days says:
no... i really dont care. right now i have like 3 other anoying guys who have a crush on me, and its not me that bringsup up, they do, just like ur doing now.
chad says:
k, good, never gonna hear about it again


So yeah.. since I havn't really had any tact the past few days (weed removes the little tact and charisma that I have), I apparently have brought it up a few times, which ended up pissin her off I suppose.. and now in her live journal, she's been writin about love and shit, and apparently something happened on wednesday that she won't tell anyone about.. so either way, I think i'm fucked as far as my chances with her go.. and thats rather depressing. Of course, my best friend whom I've had a little thing for, is now dating Reggie (who I hate) and holy fuckin shit my ex will be in town for a month... perfect timing to reject me on the rebound. So my love life is currently non existant. Time since last serious relationship: nearly a fuckin year now.

So, with that depressing me, I sit here, listening to music, trying to forget some of the DRAMA that goes on in my life (a fair amount I admit was created by me.. hard not to at 16 with raging hormones :(). I wrote another poem or two, (yes, I write that shit. I use it as a means of anger control). Now I'm sitting here as she ignores me and plays a game with randy, while talking to him on the phone. Sucks when you keep thinkin about someone you know isn't thinkin about you, eh? Anyways, i'm out for now.

Sincerely,
The one who hates drama but keeps on gettin it

[Red Devil]

u should take your drug money and invest in some hammers, goto a big parking lot at 3am with lots of cards and break into every one and get MONIES

[Red Devil]

Originally posted by Some Rogue
And apparently barely literate morons like to post under the name Red Devil

how many "hot" tv's you got? 6?

[Chadj]

Fuckin Rockin

Chad says: lol, fine, you win. I've always had a little crush on you, but nothin that i've really let get in the way of friendship heh

Danyelle says: Yeah, me too.

Chad says: ... serious?

Danyelle says: yeah :)


Danyelle was my old next door neighbor that I've 'crushed' on for 3 years. I totally just found out she liked me. Fuckin rite!


Also, looking back on my entries, my life revolves around girls WAY too much.. I need to get back to drinkin.

Alcohol, just like bitches won't things better man.

[Faent]

Lookin' for love in all the wrong places....

>>... God is the answer to all my problems. -Chadj

At least a church will likely help your family out monetarily so you don't have to sell drugs to pay the bills. I'm not condemning you morally at all, but it's just a simple fact that selling drugs is not increasing your chances of living a succesful life. One drug related conviction and you can kiss student loans, lots of good jobs, your driver's license, etc... good by. Maybe church isn't the answer either, but you're deceiving yourself if you think you have to sell marijuana to get by. Whatever you do, own your choices and their consequences.

-Scott

[Chadj]

Hah

Well, today, my mom found $50 worth of weed in my backpack rofl. Oh fuckin joy. So, I told her the whole story, about what really got stolen from my backpack (I just told her about the silver chain), about why I really owe $40 to andrew (I told her originally it was because I ruined his jersey.. but really, because it was his pipe that got stolen). I left out the part that I've been smoking it.. in fact, I assured her that I havn't been, but meh. No groundings yet, because I think she understands to a point why I've felt the need to do this, but she has to 'talk to some people first', so she's probably gonna consult with: Doctor, father, grandparents (both sides), her sister, her councellor. Oh fucking joy. Oh well, my fault.

What happened was she was waking me up this morning (I had a little bit of a hangover) and she asked if she could borrow money. I sometimes keep it in my bag, outside, hidden pocket. She knows this. However, I was so tired, I just said "it's in my bag". It wasn't in the bag, at all, so she proceeded to check every pocket.. including the one I had hidden by sewing in a false bottom (NO fucking idea how she saw past that.) So she knows now. lol. YAY! But my dad stole the car AGAIN, so I need to leave in 20 minutes (at 4:30) so I can be at work for 6. Fuck. So I'm out for now.

Chad

[GSLeloo]

I never understood why people always thought they were somehow cool because they had/took drugs. Not exactly a shot at you Chad but my friends did it too. They were like "wow we're so cool cause we smoke pot". Right.

[Chadj]

Originally posted by GSLeloo
I never understood why people always thought they were somehow cool because they had/took drugs. Not exactly a shot at you Chad but my friends did it too. They were like "wow we're so cool cause we smoke pot". Right.


I'm rather embarrassed that I do this. Other than the people I deal to, I have told maybe one or two people... I am very unproud of it.

As long as you stay focused and move on. Nothing worse than a loser doing the same shit he was at 14.

[Chadj]

Originally posted by Edaarin
That's your opinion. It's my opinion that people who don't have the fortitude to deal with what life throws at them and have to resort to escaping down a pipe have no place to talk. You might be intelligent, it's sometimes hard to filter through all the bullshit and lies that yu post or say in-game to tell.

Judging someone else's worth without getting to know them isn't something civilized people do. Were I in your position, I wouldn't be spending hours on the computer when I could be working another part time job to support my family. I wouldn't be pushing and setting a bad example for any younger family members. I don't know you from Adam but from your posts it's pretty evident you're centered on yourself. Own cell phone, computer, internet access, going to an amusement park, and yet your family can't afford groceries? Something's real fucked up there.



Heh, ask about the situation before you talk shit :).

We are not THAT bad off. Not like we are on the streets. But yes, we are below the poverty line. I have not drank alcohol or smoked pot in weeks, and previous to the first day of summer school (about july 7th) I had never smoked pot in my life. I am far from a pot head, like that seemed to have made me out to be.

I do not push anything upon my sibling. He is well aware of the shit I have gone through and gotten into by dealing this stuff, and he knows I'd personally kick his ass if he ever touched it.

I do not have the emotional capability to handle the stress of a second job. I am clinically depressive, and currently, do not have the money for the medication. As if that doesn't have me a little messed up, I'm a teenager. Yay. Hormone raging, idiot, general teen.

The cell phone is the family cell phone. We owe a shit load of money to the phone company (my fault. Fuck long distance), and so couldn't pay that off. So we had to get a cell instead. The amusement park is through my work. Costs $15 because my work and the amusement park are partners in some way (who the fuck cares.). My friend sprung for me to get into that. Internet access=$33.00 a month. We manage that, due to the fact that we use it a lot, and it is one of the ways my mother sends resume's, and looks for jobs. The computer I have had for years, and have not upgraded since january (when shit really started going down hill). It costs almost no maintenence.

I have requested 75% more shifts at work, so it's not like I'm not doing my part. My upcoming cheque will be $200. $130 going to parents, $40 set aside for my brothers b-day gift, leaving me with a whoppin $30 to spend on myself. w00t. I can.. umm.. oh, shit, wait, no, I can't spend it. Thats gotta go to saving for drivers training.

So, Edaarin, before you start attempting to post shit about MY personal life at home, know what the fuck you are talking about. In the mean time, stfu, thanks.


Also, the reason I believe they are trailer trash, is due to the fact that they did NOT act in a civilized manner.

[Chadj]

Well, over the past couple weeks, I have not used any mind or mood altering substances (including my perscription which we cannot afford). Yay me. I don't feel it's an accomplishment: I've gone months and months without booze, so meh. I'm packed as far as plans go for a week and a half, and I should be excited.. but I'm not. Who knows why. Rather apathetic right now.

Today went pretty good. Myself and Azra (my longest friend whom I just started talking to again on a regular basis a month ago. I have always had a thing for her.. always. I care about her tons, what can I say.) had a long talk about life.. in general.. and it was refreshing. She and I can relate to eachother a lot, and it's really, really cool. She's probably the only girl now that I'd really consider going out with, as in a serious relationship.. although I don't think the feelings are mutual (I hope they are tho heh). Maybe I should tell her, but I'm holding off for now, because the friendship is too valuable to me (I can't believe I just said that, but it's true).

Work was slow. Very. Very. Slow. Boring. Tiring.

I have not had my anti-depression medication for weeks.. It has taken a lot of will power at times to just not explode. I had a few comments at work that I did not seem my 'cheery, laughy, funny self' as I usually was. Today has been rather mediocre, cause I've been feeling nothing but apathy most of the day, with a few exceptions, so I don't have a lot to blog about.

All I know, is right now, im pissed, stressed, tired, and restless. Meh.

[Apathy]

Things could be worse.

You could be Canadian, or French, or.... French Canadian :scared:

[Chadj]

I am canadian.. :(

Thankfully, not french.

[Bobmuhthol]

<<They were like "wow we're so cool cause we smoke pot". Right.>>

They certainly aren't uncool because of that. And your brother drinks? You can die from alcohol, nobody has ever died from smoking marijuana.

[El Burro]

nobody?:O

[Apathy]

I knew you were from Canada, I can read :). Was just hoping to get you to turn that smile upside down and cheer up little pup!

[Arshwikk]

Originally posted by Blazing247
I think she's cute.

You'll quickly learn two lessons:

1) Never date a co-worker.
2) Attractive women aren't attracted to poor men.

As the song goes..."Girls don't like boys- girls like cars and money."

1) the exception is if you work in a frickin megaplex...my first wife (redhead soulpieced!) worked in the same place..I never saw her...anyway, the end had more to do with Jerry dying and the Greatful Dead age ending then working together.
2) sometimes beautiful women don't need money, and they just want a man....most of whom maybe they intimidate...you'd be surprised. I swear it seems I never have money until AFTER I get the girl. Then I prosper for awhile...then comes the recession where she suddenly generates nothing and drains me, and after she takes everything, I stumble, and fall into a ditch wearing my last shoe...cause the other one was lost the night before...and the next morning, I wake up, and some beautiful woman has found me and decides I am worth saving....yet again....I live in the twilight zone of love.

OKAY....now to the original topic....never put drugs and money in a locker. It's so Hollywood it's sick. And if yer gonna risk f-ing up yer life, then stop being a pussy, go big...sell mass...for 1 year...get rich, file taxes on your profits, and retire....OR just be legit, be patient, keep your eye out for opportunity, jump on it, ride the wave. When ya wipe out, some beautiful woman will be waiting anyway.

;)

[Chadj]

Originally posted by Bobmuhthol
<<They were like "wow we're so cool cause we smoke pot". Right.>>

They certainly aren't uncool because of that. And your brother drinks? You can die from alcohol, nobody has ever died from smoking marijuana.

My brother doesn't drink. Nor smoke. Nor do anything that would endanger his health other than piss me off.

[Bobmuhthol]

I QUOTED LELOO, BUT I AM CLEARLY TALKING TO YOU.

[Bobmuhthol]

Originally posted by Chadj

Originally posted by Bobmuhthol
<<They were like "wow we're so cool cause we smoke pot". Right.>>

They certainly aren't uncool because of that. And your brother drinks? You can die from alcohol, nobody has ever died from smoking marijuana.

My brother doesn't drink. Nor smoke. Nor do anything that would endanger his health other than piss me off.


Quoting this in its entirety so Chadj can't edit/delete his post.

[Chadj]

I wouldn't have made it to edit or delete. So what, I made a mistake. I'm human. Suck balls.

[Bobmuhthol]

SUCK BALLS?! ARE YOU INSULTING MY SEXUAL PREFERENCE?!?!?!?

[Chadj]

No. I merely told you to suck balls.

[xtc]

Chadj just a suggestion but if you are clinically depressed you shouldn't be doing pot or any other street drugs it will only make things worse. Dealing will only you get you in trouble, someone will rat you out. Trafficing is a much more serious offense than possesion.

Regarding your medication, if your parents don't have drug plans with their jobs they can write off part of the cost of medication on their taxes. I realize that this may not help you now. I don't think you will qualify for student welfare if you are working and living at home, but they may give you a drug card so your medication will be free.

Good luck

[El Burro]

Isn't weed legal in Canada? Thought I read that somewhere...

[xtc]

lol no pot isn't legal up here yet. Medical pot is when allowed by a doctor. A few judges have refused to prosecute possesion cases but cops are still arresting and convinctions are still happening. But I was talking a trafficing a much more serious offense up.

[Chadj]

Title says it all.

Normally, it sucks when life throws a curve ball out of the blue. But.. this one sucks/rocks. I might be getting back together with my ex, my first (and only) love (i know, sounds corny, make fun of it if you want, i seriously don't care). That fucking rocks so fucking much. not even a little bit of rockage. A LOT OF ROCKAGE. The bad part is, in a couple weeks, she's moving for 4 months. That blows balls. Tons of balls. I won't see her all that much untill she moves back February 1st. So I'm not sure exactly what to do. I want her to be happy, so I don't want her to be tied down with a guy she is barely seeing.. But I don't wanna let her go, and find someone better than me (which, im sure, is possible). I'll figure all that shit out later.. but what matters now is, SHE FUCKING TOTALLY HAS FEELINGS FOR ME AND IT FUCKING ROCKS AND IM FUCKING IN THE ZONE.

[Chadj]

Pot is not legal, however, posession of pot is decriminalized now. Trafficking is still like, 5-15 or something like that.

[Edited on 8-24-2004 by Chadj]

[Chadj]

<<Regarding your medication, if your parents don't have drug plans with their jobs they can write off part of the cost of medication on their taxes. I realize that this may not help you now. I don't think you will qualify for student welfare if you are working and living at home, but they may give you a drug card so your medication will be free.>>

One parent is not employed. Does not even live at home.
The other is fucked without the medication that we cannot afford, and only recently pulled off getting a job. A horrible job, but a job. It doesn't have benifits.

Recently, the car got repo'd. We owed 230 on it. Now we get to start from scratch with a full $3000 owed on it. Don't ask how that works, I don't pretend to understand

Haha we sux. BUT I DONT CARE IM IN A GOOD FUCKIN MOOD MWA HAHA

[xtc]

Originally posted by Chadj
Pot is not legal, however, posession of pot is decriminalized now. Trafficking is still like, 5-15 or something like that.

[Edited on 8-24-2004 by Chadj]

Pot possesion is still a criminal charge in Canada. There are talking about changing it but it hasn't happened yet.

http://www.cbc.ca/news/background/marijuana/marijuana_legalize.html

[Betheny]

Originally posted by Chadj
Title says it all.

Normally, it sucks when life throws a curve ball out of the blue. But.. this one sucks/rocks. I might be getting back together with my ex, my first (and only) love (i know, sounds corny, make fun of it if you want, i seriously don't care). That fucking rocks so fucking much. not even a little bit of rockage. A LOT OF ROCKAGE. The bad part is, in a couple weeks, she's moving for 4 months. That blows balls. Tons of balls. I won't see her all that much untill she moves back February 1st. So I'm not sure exactly what to do. I want her to be happy, so I don't want her to be tied down with a guy she is barely seeing.. But I don't wanna let her go, and find someone better than me (which, im sure, is possible). I'll figure all that shit out later.. but what matters now is, SHE FUCKING TOTALLY HAS FEELINGS FOR ME AND IT FUCKING ROCKS AND IM FUCKING IN THE ZONE.

Dude, is it Teeoncy?

[Chadj]

Fuck. They better change that.


And no, her name is Kayla.

[Betheny]

awww, so cute. :loveu: My little chadj is growing up.

[Chadj]

Terrible fucking mood.

My father gets home, after being gone a week, smoking crack. OH JOY.

A girl I care about very much, is moving 5 hours away. OH FUCKING JOY 2.

My mother is having another one of her cry-sprees. HOLY SHIT I LOVE LIVING HERE.

Shit is bad enough that I let a bunch of fucking pricks get to me on OOC. Fuckin A.

I just wanna punch shit.

School starts soon, and I can't even put together a rational paragraph to release some fuckin anger. Fuckin shit. I was actually gonna write some shit, but I lost my train of thought, so fuck it.

Love,
Chad

It can always be worse. That's my motto

[Chadj]

I am currently drunk and stoned, and I can't stop thinking of Rachelle. She is only a friend to me, but a very close friend.. she means a lot to me. I'm worried about her, and her habits. Coke, E, Acid, Shrooms.. She won't stop. And it bothers me. I'm tired, so will edit to add more when I wake up, but damn... :(

[Bobmuhthol]

<<and I can't stop thinking of Rachelle.>>

Stop stealing my girl + le.

[Chadj]

NEVAR.

Besides, Rachelle is just a friend... Mostly because thats all she cares for me as. But meh.

The bad part is, my mom just asked me if I was smoking pot. When I said know, she turned around, looked disappointed, and went upstairs.

UH OH, LOOKS LIKE IM DEAD.

[Betheny]

Originally posted by Chadj
NEVAR.

Besides, Rachelle is just a friend... Mostly because thats all she cares for me as. But meh.

The bad part is, my mom just asked me if I was smoking pot. When I said know, she turned around, looked disappointed, and went upstairs.

UH OH, LOOKS LIKE IM DEAD.

I'm assuming you meant 'no', and that's a good reason right there you shouldn't be smoking pot.

[Chadj]

I am pissed.

I no longer have any access to gemstone.

'nuff said.

[Chadj]

I FUCKING HATE U ALL BCUZ U MADE ME CRIE TOO MUCH NOW IM NEVER POSTING AGAIN!!!!!111


No, but seriously, just posting this hear cause if someone doesn't care, they dont have to read: I'm pretty much done posting for a while. A lot of shit came up, and I might disappear for a while, or I might still post a few times a day. But thats all.

Just didn't want anyone to worry. :P

Love,
Le Chad

[Sylphsyte]

I'll miss you, if it means anything

[longshot]

You're a mess...

[Sean]

Didn't this last like a week last time you said that? If that long...

[longshot]

You're just now figuring out that Chadj is completely and utterly full of shit???

Tijay, I know you're smarter than that.

You really have to stop giving people the benefit of the doubt...

[Chadj]

Originally posted by Tijay
Didn't this last like a week last time you said that? If that long...

I've never said it before. I've never been serious. That, before, was a jest as well. Jeeze. Never take anything I say seriously.


Anyways, Tomorrow's the big day

After an explosive season of completely dominating nearly every team in the league, and ending with a regular season record of 5-1, and then destroying teams in the playoffs 52-6 and 36-16, the 'ship comes tomorrow night. Although I have had about a minute of collective playing time, I've worked my ass off in practice every day since the beginning of the season, seeing us win the 'ship will make it all worth while. I won't get to play, but I can't wait. This is going to be a third consecutive year where Bluevale and Preston are playing eachother in the senior finals. I am completely convinced we will repeat the last two years, and us Preston Panthers will be takin it home. Fuckin right. It all starts tomorrow at 6 for a team dinner, then at the field for the 9:00 kickoff. w00t.

[Edited on 11-11-2004 by Chadj]

[Chadj]

Warning; if you don't care, don't complain when you read it. Thanks.

Preston Panthers

Stepping out onto the field, I felt like a god. My team was running onto that field at University stadium. It made me think of everything that got us there.

The season started out with a team of guys, who no one expected anything from. We were one of the smaller teams, with 18 starting rookies, as most of our team left the year before. We didn't even expect much out of ourselves. We lost our first game to Jacob Hespler.. Which I suppose motivated us; because the next week, everyone practiced that much harder, that much better. We were that much stronger, that much faster, that much smarter. From there, we began pushing eachother, challenging eachother to get better. We did that every day, every week. Three hours a day, we worked harder, pushing eachother further. We blasted through every team that dared stand in our way from there. We bonded, closer than any team I've ever been with. And we improved, more than any team I've ever been with. We were on a mission, and we had something to prove. Defending two time WCSSAA champions, we weren't going to let our school down. Every game, we stepped up, and got a little better. Going through the season, we finished it with a respectable 5-1, giving us first place in the south division. We set our sights on the playoffs.

The playoffs went excellent. Both were home games, and we dominated both. We were going to the 'ship, baby, and nothin was stopping us. With the best two runningbacks in the league, and an invincible O line, what could, right? Little could. Our defense was at least second in the league. Our Offense was first in the league. We were ready to run over, run past, run THROUGH people; for victory... for glory.

Then came the night. The night of the game. I was sitting through school, I couldn't maintain a focus, I was jittery.. I was going insane. Finally the bell rang.. it was 2:40. Three more hours, and I would be with my friends.. my team. We would be eating dinner at the school as a team, and hanging out for a few hours before the game. We ate, hung out, laughed, joked. We had some people speak to us, people who had in the past lost the championship.. won the championship.. coached for this school in the past. We were amped. We were ready. We suited up, and waited in the change room for our coaches to give the game plan and talk. After some last minute reminders on Bluevale's offensive and defensive tendancies, we were on the bus. Things were quiet. We were focusing, as not a single one of us wasn't at least a little nervous. But when we got there.. Every single one of us was pumped. The cheers outside the bus, the chants.. PHS.. PHS.. PHS. We stepped off that bus, and ran through the crowd, as it parted for us. I tried to keep a smile off my face.. I was focusing. But I couldn't help completely.. I had a small, comfortable grin on my face. Let me tell you;This is one of the greatest feelings in the world. Everyone there, even the ones cheering the other team, were there to watch US play. Us and them. It was awesome. The stands were filled.

I stepped out onto the field with my team, and we began the warmups. The stretches. The maneuvers. Everything. It was our usual routine, the one that had brought us here with a record of 7-1.. A record of domination. The junior game had just finished.. Bluevale juniors had won. Twice in a row now. We knew we didn't wanna see them get a double winner.. We weren't gonna let that happen. Finally, the refs called in the team captains. As the captains were there, we did the usual. We got into four lines, people spaced 5 yards apart, and 3 sets of Preston stride jumps...

P-R-E-S-T-O-N..
P-R-E-S-T-O-N..
P-R-E-S-T-O-N..

With the final 'N', we all cheered loudly, and ran onto the 35 yard line and grouped together, helmuts off, waiting for our captains to return. And as they ran towards us, the circle parted, allowing them in, as cheers erupted. We quiet down, as our lead running back, Shannon Canning, tells us that this is our game, this is our turf, this is our field. He asks us the same two questions every time we're on home field...

Whose house is this?
OUR HOUSE!
WHOSE HOUSE?
OUR HOUSE!

He asks us to 'put our buckets up', so we all raise our helmuts high, proudly.. Shannon starts our chant off, as is tradition, and we all join in.

PHS WHAT TIME IS IT?
IT'S GO TIME, IT'S GO TIME!
PHS WHAT TIME IS IT?
IT'S SHOW TIME IT'S SHOW TIME!
PHS WHAT TIME IS IT?
IT'S TIME TO GET LOUD,
IT'S TIME TO REPRESENT,
PHS WHAT TIME IS IT?!

And with a loud OHH from all of us, we set up, and get ready to recieve the ball.


(I'll write the rest of the game later.. Something came up haha. :thumbsdown: )

[Edited on 11-13-2004 by Chadj]

[Latrinsorm]

Long story short, they invaded Russia (henceforth to be known as Canada II). :D

[Back]

Originally posted by Latrinsorm
Long story short, they invaded Russia (henceforth to be known as Canada II). :D

LOL. And good story Chadj.

[Chadj]

I wrote up the second half, but I'll post it later, cause it's lost somewhere on my computer :(

[Chadj]

Wtf. parents suck left testical

Ok, so I met this 'Shannon' girl (a 9th grade at my school) a while back through a mutual friend. We became really good friends, really fast, and started hanging out a lot two months ago. Well, things have gotten more serious since then, and we have been dating unofficially for the past few weeks. Last night, I was supposed to ask her out and make it official. We were gonna go get Ice Cappucinos (sp?) (we love em <3) and I was gonna ask her.. well, I dunno how or why, but her dad said she can't. She started getting really upset, because I guess she knew what was gonna happen that night. So when I call up to see whats going on, her dad says shes grounded. So, I talk to her the next day.. SHE ISN'T FUCKING ALLOWED TO DATE ME. Which, I could accept, but she can't even be friends with me! We OBVIOUSLY are gonna stay friends, but I just totally had my hopes shot down the fucking head janitor at my school (her step dad). What a fucking prick. Jeeze. IM SO FUCKING PISSED/DEPRESSED RIGHT NOW.

Since a few of you are parents, I want a little insight here? I think it's cause I'm 2 years older that they don't want her around me... anyone have some advice to maybe change their minds?

On a side note, she mumbled "I love you" and I didn't really hear her and said "what?" and then she said "nothing"... and I just realized shortly after, what she had said. omg today totally blows ASS

[DeV]

The good news is that you're in a win-win situation at this point. The more her step-dad insists she can't date or be friends with you, the more she will *probably* want to and go against him. :)

[HarmNone]

It might not have anything to do with you, hon. It might just be that her parents don't want her dating anybody because they feel she's too young. It might be that her parents feel that if you two hang around as friends, things will continue to escalate. It's not realistic of her dad to think he can control this, but that may be what he's trying to do. :(

[DeV]

Not only that HN, her dad is unwittingly helping to fuel her desire to do just the opposite of what he wants. My little sister is in 9th grade and if a 16 year old wanted to date her I'd be wary also considering. I can see his concern but he's going about it the wrong way.

[longshot]

Originally posted by HarmNone
It might not have anything to do with you, hon. It might just be that her parents don't want her dating anybody because they feel she's too young. It might be that her parents feel that if you two hang around as friends, things will continue to escalate. It's not realistic of her dad to think he can control this, but that may be what he's trying to do. :(

It's also possible that her parents are involved in her life and care about her future:yes:

[HarmNone]

Ummm...I think that's what I was saying, Longshot......:?:

[longshot]

No, no...

Her parents caring about her future is a solid reason to prevent her from dating Chadj specifically.

It would really have nothing to do with dating in general.

I'm thinking more along the lines of, "Anyone but that kid"...

[Chadj]

They don't know me yet, so it probably isn't ACTUALLY me.

She has had boyfriends in the past, so it is unfortunately most likely the age thing :(.

I can understand if they didn't want Shannon to date me because of my age. Thats fine... I wasn't even sure untill recently that I would want to date her, due to the age difference. However, not wanting me to be a good friend of hers.. That is just retarded.

I plan on going and personally introducing myself to them sometime soon, and hopefully try to show that I'm not actually a bad guy... but they seem really adamant. :(.

[Chadj]

Originally posted by longshot
No, no...

Her parents caring about her future is a solid reason to prevent her from dating Chadj specifically.

It would really have nothing to do with dating in general.

I'm thinking more along the lines of, "Anyone but that kid"...

Again, they don't know me, however if her dad asks around about me (like I said, he works at my school) he'd be impressed. The teachers would have nothing bad to say, I'm well liked, I'm involved in the school and community. I would probably find what you're saying to be funny.. but I'm not in a 'ha ha' mood :(

[Kaeral]

Say.. have you considered joining the army? It would obviously require you to leave home, and your friends, but at least you would have a much larger income, not to mention no need to worry about food and lodging.. I actually don't know what the minimum age is, but I would suggest you at least consider it. You get full medical care for one, not to mention that you would be able to financially support your family much better..

[Latrinsorm]

Originally posted by Chadj
anyone have some advice to maybe change their minds? Less cursing, less drug use, less impatience, less going after freshwomen.

[Chadj]

The swearing is staying,

Drugs are done cause they're stupid

Fuck you, impatience is the new patience of 2004

Teh younguns are teh hot.



As far as my family, since we have moved, we are much better off.. but my mom still refuses to kick out my dad who just stole 400 from us, so meh. Who knows. I've considered joining the army a lot.. mostly to pay for my post-secondary education.

[Latrinsorm]

Originally posted by Chadj
The swearing is staying,Aight.
Drugs are done cause they're stupidGood job.
Fuck you, impatience is the new patience of 2004Try that out in football sometime. "OFFSIDES IS THE NEW ONSIDES, STUPID REFS."
Teh younguns are teh hot.Ew.

[Chadj]

I totally told the refs that.. they decided not to keep up with the fads.

They don't want to be cool :(

[Edited on 11-18-2004 by Chadj]

[HarmNone]

I think you have the right idea with the intent to make it a point to introduce yourself to them and get to know them a bit. Perhaps, once they come to know you they will change their minds about allowing a friendship between you and their daughter.

If I had a daughter and she thoguht about dating at 9th grade, someone's legs would get BROKE.

- Arkans

[SpunGirl]

Hm. When I was fifteen, Chadj, I was all :heart: x 1000 over a guy who was 18 (his name was Chad, incidentally). I'd been out with him in a group a few times, but when I told my parents he wanted to take me out alone, my dad's reaction was, "What does an 18-year-old want with a 15-year-old? That's ridiculous."

Well, it was also his mistake, because I immediately turned on the waterworks and said, "Maybe he just LIKES me, okay? Is that so hard to believe?!?!?"

So of course they let me date him. He was really and truly a great guy. In fact, before I met my husband, I never dated anyone my parents liked better. Let her folks get to know you, take her out with a group of friends, whatever.

Don't sneak around, because they will find out, and facilitating her sneakiness will only lower their opinion of you.

-K

[Chadj]

I suggested the whole "me meet her parents" thing to her best friend.. that won't be going apparently.

:(:(:(

I lose so hard:(

[Chadj]

Warning
Just the usual warning. If you don't give a shit, and then read this, you have no right to bitch or complain afterwards.

Ok, I don't want to post this on my public blog, but i feel the need to get it off my chest, so i'll put it here. I am in no way bragging (as I'm sure some people will say), I am just getting this out.


About 10 minutes ago, I lost my virginity to someone I barely know. I feel terrible.

Tonight, I am supposed to ask a girl I like out, but I feel really bad, because... well, I just fucked someone other then her.

I actually have a lot to say, but the girl I was with is coming downstairs, so I'll talk about it later.

But WHY do I feel so terrible?

Also, sex isn't all it's cracked up to be.


Edited to note that the pizza pockets I just ate were very good, and that I should be shot.

[Edited on 12-10-2004 by Chadj]

[DeV]

Losing your virginity to someone you barely know is teh suck which is probably why you're feeling bad. It was not with someone you care about which means there were no little to no feelings involved other than being horny, willing and ready. Having sex for the first time under those circumstances can leave you with an empty feeling especially as it's something you'll remember for the rest of your life.

Also, if you just lost it 10 minutes ago, I'd wager it was uneventful. Believe me, with someone you truly love with a passion or even just care about immensly, sex is all that and then some.

[Kainen]

Originally posted by Chadj
About 10 minutes ago, I lost my virginity to someone I barely know. I feel terrible.

Tonight, I am supposed to ask a girl I like out, but I feel really bad, because... well, I just fucked someone other then her.

I actually have a lot to say, but the girl I was with is coming downstairs, so I'll talk about it later.

But WHY do I feel so terrible?

Also, sex isn't all it's cracked up to be.


You feel terrible because you were physically intimate with someone you don't care much about while you were supposed to approach a girl you do like a lot. After all, how would you like it if some girl had sex with a guy, then let you know she wanted to date you? As for sex... it can be one of the best things in life.. usually with the right person. I know that for me, it was always better when I really cared for the person I was with.

[Caiylania]

Not being a guy, I can't say much on what a guy goes through in the wanting to/actually loosing/in regards to virginity.

I know a lot of people who have done and felt as you do (guys and girls) and can only hope that your next time is with someone you care about and appreciate.

And I feel the need to say ....... have safe sex when you please. No one wants to hear that you caught something and/or are really sick from it. Take care of yourself.

From the female point of view, I've never understood girls willing to have sex so soon cause I sure as hell wasn't going to risk getting pregnant and going through childbirth for someone who probably wouldn't give a shit.

Nothing wrong with having something to tide you over.

- Arkans

[Syberus]

I'll IM you later when you come around to talk, I'm not real big on the whole advice on the public boards thing.

Word of caution, never listen to my advice.

- Arkans

[Syberus]

Well.. I don't mean advice as in telling him to do something, I never tell anyone what to do. More like... talk and relate and whatnot

My advice on that?

Well, it requires this

1. Small asian boy
2. 2 lengths of rope
3. Broom handle
4. Step ladder
5. 6 ounces of lube
6. A turkey baster
7. A candy cane


What's it all used for? YOU decide.

- Arkans

I coulda swore you claimed not to be a virgin a long time ago

[Chadj]

Joy.

Well, it's new years eve.

I don't get to see my girlfriend tonight, and tonight is our 'anniversary' of some number of whatever, I don't know right now.

How do I get to spend new years eve? Babysitting my best friend's sister. I ended up becoming friends with her recently, and I went to a party with her. After she got drunk, I promised her I'd make sure she is fine. She just threw up into a box of smirnoff. I am not having the great new years I invisioned.. I was sorta hoping along the lines of being with Erin counting down with the ball.. instead, I get to stop by her place for 5 minutes to see her cause he parents said we can't hang out tonight. I need a smoke, I want to toke (no rhyme intended), and I want another beer, but I have to sit here and watch heather. Happy fucking new year.

I got kicked outta my house the other day, so I've been sleeping at my dealers place for the past few days. She just threw up, so I should go, but I will probably chronical this very exciting night as it happens.

And with no sarcasm, Happy New Years to those that are enjoying their night :)

[Divinity]

Happy New Years to you too. I guess I'm a bit confused. You were kicked out of your house and now you're at your dealer's house that so happens to have a computer?

When I was kicked out of my parent's house I was too worried about where I was going to sleep each night and funds. You know, all that life supporting stuff.

I suppose it's not all that bad if you have a place to stay and the time to get on a comp to blog? :?:

[Edited on 1-1-2005 by Divinity]

[Chadj]

Back home now.

w00t.

A rather uneventful time away from home.

[Chadj]

Well, I broke up with a girl I was crazy for. Long story short, I've known for about 3 weeks that the relationship was degrading on her side, and so I went over to her place, and we had small talk for a little bit, and I finally got up enough courage to just turn to her and say "Erin.. I know.. It's over.". I broke up with her cause I knew she was too afraid to do it. Anyways, I'm fine now, but I can't really put it into better words than my blog on myspace.

http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&friendID=12032517&b logID=20560732&Mytoken=20050403090731

So.. yeah. Had a hard time, but I'm managing through it. I know I'm only 16, and that there will be plenty of chances for love, but that doesn't mean the feelings I feel aren't there... and the pain I am going through is minor. Not at all. Heh.

[Bobmuhthol]

Man, I wish I had the luxury of breakup advantage. Nearly everything was her call.

[Chadj]

She wanted to, but was too afraid to do it. It was harder having me dump her, cause I can't help but think that if I didn't dump her, could I have fixed it? Heh. But it's passed now.. sorta. W00t, I redye my hair tonight.

[StrayRogue]

Plenty more fish in the see Chadj/Bob. Don't fret.

Man. I read the top post about you reading your virginity, and I was all "Woa, did he brag about nailing several chicks long before this post" and lo and behold I see my post from forever ago.

[Chadj]

I really have to save this somewhere I will remember it.. so it goes here untill I throw it onto myspace. It's not really for anyone here, cause no one knows what the fuck is going on, but it's all good.



I hate dumb people who try to lie, and really suck at it.

Example, today, I was talking to someone who recently cheated on his girlfriend named Steph. I knew who he was, but pretended not to.

Me: So, ya kissed heather again today, eh?

Him: steph told you

Me: No, I went to your school last semester, someone else told me. Dumbass.

Him: K.

Me: Wait till I see you, buddy. You don't fuck around on friends of mine.

Him: ok there.....i didnt fuk on friends of urs wtf. i 4got i wasnt laoud to kiss hetaher nemore buddy, so know ur facts.

Me: Haha, you forgot that you couldn't cheat on your girlfriend? Are you fucking stupid?

Him: no i forgot i couldnt cos i forgot i was going out with steph u dumbass


Me: Wow, holy shit, you ARE dumb. "Uh, yeah, I forgot I was dating someone!". Either very dumb, or very retarded, but either way, it's a load of shit. OR, you just don't care about her.

Him: i love her to death, man if i could take it bak i would

Me: Right

Him: idk wtf u think i kno wat i kno, and thats the truth

Me: Clearly, you don't know much.

Him: i od.,.. wat i dont kno?

Me: You don't know a whole lot, if you think that I'm gonna buy some Beef Wellington Challenged story like that.

Him: i dont expect u to buy the truth, i dont even kno who the fuk u r

Me: You will, when I come see you.


[Edited on 4-27-2005 by Chadj]

[Brattt8525]

His spelling made my eyes bleed damnit.

[Chadj]

Mine too... I'm want to beat his ass in for his spelling, almost as much as cheating on Steph. :(

[Chadj]

thanks.. Fixed.