Artha
07-10-2004, 02:39 PM
I've become aware that a lot of you empaths are acting strangely, especially with the introduction of Bone Shatter. In an attempt to set you straight, and for the betterment of Elanthia, this is my own personal list of how to be a proper empath.
Char Gen
The most important part of your character is the name. That's the first thing people see, and how they'll know you're an empath. The key to making a totally rad empath name is picking two words. Remember, they have to be cute words! For example, Hugs and Bunny. These combine to make Bunnyhugs!
With the introduction of last names, a perfect last name for Bunnyhugs is Giggle'Kisses. Last names follow the same formula as first names, but have apostrophes. They make you look sophisticated.
We all know that faeries are cute, right? Well, Aelotoi (pronounce Altoid) are the closest things we have, and so you get a higher Preciousness Percentage for picking one of them! Remember, the bigger your PP is, the less you suck at life!
Races are just groups of stat bonuses, not something you should be expected to roleplay. If you're a dark elf, pick Dhe'nar as your culture. Why? Because Faendryl are so cliche. Make sure that you do not, under any circumstances pick ebon/black/dark skin and silver/white hair. Violet eyes? What are you? Retarded? Now that that's done, it's ok to cavort with every halfling you see.
Behavior
Giggle. This can't be stressed enough. Is a dog really a dog if it doesn't bark? Think of giggling like an empath's bark.
Skip. Same thing. It doesn't matter if your entire body is covered in wounds that are leaking puss, you've got to do your best to look cute.
Beam. The beam/giggle/skip combo is what makes the difference between a good empath, and a STELLAR empuff.
Etiquette
The best use of your time is healing. When you're not healing, you should be AFK and maybe snickering as people bleed to death. It's alright though, because 'Heawin' makes me ti'ed!' You need more chocolate, and maybe a pinworn item or two to refresh yourself.
Don't nod. This slows down you getting EXP, and so is a very, very bad thing. EXP is important.
If someone steals from you, attacks you, or maybe makes fun of your speech, it's not your fault. Threaten to black list them, even though it's a loss of valuable exp. They'll never think of the NPC healer or herbs, so they'll cry themselves to sleep when they think of how they wronged you.
Share the wealth! If 3 or more people don't have access to your account, you're just being greedy.
Totally unique and interesting quirks that make sure your character is NOT 2-dimensional
Chocolate is your friend.
The accent of a two year old becomes you. Replace your Rs with Ws, your Vs with Bs, and end any and all nouns with -ies. Also, sorcerer becomes sorcie, wizard becomes wizzie, and empath becomes empuff. You may be too cute to say the whole word though, so it's ok to shorten it to puff. You should also probably add Ses to things that aren't plural.
Style
If it can be worn, it goes with your outfit.
If critters can drop it, you can wear it. Remember this, and you will go far.
If it can be worn, it goes with your outfit.
If you can't use it, you can still wear it! Just do it.
If it can be worn, it goes with your outfit.
Moral Dilemas
So, you're talking. Then, all of a sudden this rude bag of exp walks in and bleeds everywhere and asks for help. Ignore it, you'll get a few extra exp from the bloodloss it takes while you finish your conversation. Remember to giggle and maybe hug them afterwards, that makes it all ok. If they decide to get huffy, inform them that they only waited three seconds. Actual time does not matter.
So, another healer walks in. F them, this is your experience, and they have no right getting within 5 rooms of the place! Calmly, intelligently inform them that "I's on dooty, yer not rally neded her'." If they don't leave, whine, until they get fed up and drag themselves and their 75 pounds of fluff, 10 pounds of food, and 150 pounds of retarded character traits out.
So, you have a feature alteration. Be sure to get your eyes done in the ever original <emotion> <color> formula. You can also add something like boundless depths or maybe a line about how the eyes hypnotize you at the end. Make absolutely, positively sure that your hair cascades! If it doesn't, you're a sad excuse for a human being, let alone an empath. Oh, and make the hair an absolutely precious color. Maybe blue, pink, or green. Natural colors are for losers.
[Edited on 7-10-2004 by Artha]
[Edited on 7-18-2004 by Artha]
[Edited on 7-25-2004 by Artha]
Char Gen
The most important part of your character is the name. That's the first thing people see, and how they'll know you're an empath. The key to making a totally rad empath name is picking two words. Remember, they have to be cute words! For example, Hugs and Bunny. These combine to make Bunnyhugs!
With the introduction of last names, a perfect last name for Bunnyhugs is Giggle'Kisses. Last names follow the same formula as first names, but have apostrophes. They make you look sophisticated.
We all know that faeries are cute, right? Well, Aelotoi (pronounce Altoid) are the closest things we have, and so you get a higher Preciousness Percentage for picking one of them! Remember, the bigger your PP is, the less you suck at life!
Races are just groups of stat bonuses, not something you should be expected to roleplay. If you're a dark elf, pick Dhe'nar as your culture. Why? Because Faendryl are so cliche. Make sure that you do not, under any circumstances pick ebon/black/dark skin and silver/white hair. Violet eyes? What are you? Retarded? Now that that's done, it's ok to cavort with every halfling you see.
Behavior
Giggle. This can't be stressed enough. Is a dog really a dog if it doesn't bark? Think of giggling like an empath's bark.
Skip. Same thing. It doesn't matter if your entire body is covered in wounds that are leaking puss, you've got to do your best to look cute.
Beam. The beam/giggle/skip combo is what makes the difference between a good empath, and a STELLAR empuff.
Etiquette
The best use of your time is healing. When you're not healing, you should be AFK and maybe snickering as people bleed to death. It's alright though, because 'Heawin' makes me ti'ed!' You need more chocolate, and maybe a pinworn item or two to refresh yourself.
Don't nod. This slows down you getting EXP, and so is a very, very bad thing. EXP is important.
If someone steals from you, attacks you, or maybe makes fun of your speech, it's not your fault. Threaten to black list them, even though it's a loss of valuable exp. They'll never think of the NPC healer or herbs, so they'll cry themselves to sleep when they think of how they wronged you.
Share the wealth! If 3 or more people don't have access to your account, you're just being greedy.
Totally unique and interesting quirks that make sure your character is NOT 2-dimensional
Chocolate is your friend.
The accent of a two year old becomes you. Replace your Rs with Ws, your Vs with Bs, and end any and all nouns with -ies. Also, sorcerer becomes sorcie, wizard becomes wizzie, and empath becomes empuff. You may be too cute to say the whole word though, so it's ok to shorten it to puff. You should also probably add Ses to things that aren't plural.
Style
If it can be worn, it goes with your outfit.
If critters can drop it, you can wear it. Remember this, and you will go far.
If it can be worn, it goes with your outfit.
If you can't use it, you can still wear it! Just do it.
If it can be worn, it goes with your outfit.
Moral Dilemas
So, you're talking. Then, all of a sudden this rude bag of exp walks in and bleeds everywhere and asks for help. Ignore it, you'll get a few extra exp from the bloodloss it takes while you finish your conversation. Remember to giggle and maybe hug them afterwards, that makes it all ok. If they decide to get huffy, inform them that they only waited three seconds. Actual time does not matter.
So, another healer walks in. F them, this is your experience, and they have no right getting within 5 rooms of the place! Calmly, intelligently inform them that "I's on dooty, yer not rally neded her'." If they don't leave, whine, until they get fed up and drag themselves and their 75 pounds of fluff, 10 pounds of food, and 150 pounds of retarded character traits out.
So, you have a feature alteration. Be sure to get your eyes done in the ever original <emotion> <color> formula. You can also add something like boundless depths or maybe a line about how the eyes hypnotize you at the end. Make absolutely, positively sure that your hair cascades! If it doesn't, you're a sad excuse for a human being, let alone an empath. Oh, and make the hair an absolutely precious color. Maybe blue, pink, or green. Natural colors are for losers.
[Edited on 7-10-2004 by Artha]
[Edited on 7-18-2004 by Artha]
[Edited on 7-25-2004 by Artha]