Worst Ever Pickup Lines You Ever Personally Heard.

[Galleazzo]

Let's see how long we can keep this up.

"You wanna feel my vasectomy staples?"

[Shalla]

Eww.. they couldn't have used that.. it's too ridiculous and silly. :lol:

[Galleazzo]

Swear to god. Rob thought he was a real stud because he was a redhead and had a guitar. Too bad his teeth were half rotted out and he was a cokehead and a dealer, but we can't all be perfect.

[Betheny]

I'll list them later.... wooh. I've heard some good ones.

[theotherjohn]

hey, Didnt we use to fuck?

[Nieninque]

Get your coat, you've pulled :rolleyes:

[longshot]

"I'm from America."

Unfortunately, it works constantly.

edited to add that due to the recent geopolitical events, "I'm from England" can sometimes, but not always, be an equal substitue.

Australia and New Zealand just posess the same power.



[Edited on 7-1-2004 by longshot]

[CrystalTears]

"What do you like for breakfast so that I can make it for you in the morning?"

Pretty confident with yourself, huh sport?

[Soulpieced]

Best pickup line ever that hasn't been used and Soulpieced has it trademarked.

"It's not gonna suck itself".

[Czeska]

"Hey baby my friend's been digging you all night." (followed by said friend falling face first into brick wall)

[Axhinde]

"You're parents must be retarded, because you're special."

WTF?

And the one I love using most, simply for the comedic value

The infamous "Pizza and a fuck" line.

[Czeska]

oooo you sweet talker you.

/end gagging sarcasm

[Axhinde]

Originally posted by Czeska
oooo you sweet talker you.

/end gagging sarcasm

For the record, Mir :heart: me.

[Czeska]

It's cause you're such a smooooooooooth talker

[Axhinde]

Worst pickup line heard recently:

"You are such a smoooooooth talker."

[Edaarin]

Buddy of mine and I are sitting in class, and he puts his hand on this girl's leg. Following conversation ensues.

"Um. EXCUSE me. Your hand is on my leg."
"Oh, I'm sorry. I thought it was my leg, you know we're both wearing jeans."

[DianaBanana]

Originally posted by Edaarin
Buddy of mine and I are sitting in class, and he puts his hand on this girl's leg. Following conversation ensues.

"Um. EXCUSE me. Your hand is on my leg."
"Oh, I'm sorry. I thought it was my leg, you know we're both wearing jeans."

Dont lie man, you were the one who said that to the girl. :P

[Edaarin]

Nah, mine are worse. :whistle: They work better though.

Example:

Standing waiting for UTS to come, I saw a really cute girl sitting on a bench. I said (under my breath) "Oh wow" when I walked by, she smiled at me and I got a number a few minutes later.

Too bad she turned out to be a crazy ass bitch.

[Wezas]

"She's a whiny bitch" "He's a dumbass"

Then a friend of mine told her that I liked her (which was a lie) and told her that I liked her (which was a lie) and we hooked up.

But yeah, I was right with my first assessment and she was dumped shortly thereafter.

[Vestarr]

Probably the worst ive ever used that work was : Hello you have a boyfriend? no...really would ya like one for the night ..

[Kadumi]

(while slowly reaching for them)

you have two....beautiful....round.....shoulders

[DianaBanana]

Heh, at the renfaire one of the Knights says to me "Would you like to touch my sword?" ;)

I just stood there laughing. Oy vey.

Oh and then last night at bowling one of the guys on the other team says "Wanna polish my ball off?" :lol:

[Edited on 7-1-2004 by DianaBanana]

[Kadumi]

I suppose that's better than him asking you for a rousing game of hide the sword

[Wezas]

"According to my magic watch, you're not wearing underwear"

<glance at the watch and tap it a few times>

"This damn thing must be an hour fast again"

[Mint]

I get a lot of passes from drunk passengers. Go me. Usually along the lines of "I need a girlfriend that can drive because I lost my license"

Be still my beating heart...

[StrayRogue]

This was often used by me in the student bar on campus:

"Hello big-tits, looking for some action?"

[Czeska]

A guy I knew in college once.. we were all at a club, looking over a balcony at a patio dance floor, and he was scamming some chick. He said.. what should I say to pick her up?

I said, sarcastically, "Hi, I'm a slut too! Wanna fuck?"

He said, "OMG do you think that would work?!"

[crazymage]

Originally posted by Edaarin
Nah, mine are worse. :whistle: They work better though.

Example:

Standing waiting for UTS to come, I saw a really cute girl sitting on a bench. I said (under my breath) "Oh wow" when I walked by, she smiled at me and I got a number a few minutes later.

Too bad she turned out to be a crazy ass bitch.

You met Michiko!? :hides:

I dare some dude to have the balls to use the "becoming" pick up line, when not actually intoxicated.

[Latrinsorm]

Originally posted by Mint
Be still my beating heart... :lol2:

Note to self (and hey, any other stalker wannabes): get a license, then head out west. No competition!!

[Atlanteax]

Originally posted by Czeska
A guy I knew in college once.. we were all at a club, looking over a balcony at a patio dance floor, and he was scamming some chick. He said.. what should I say to pick her up?

I said, sarcastically, "Hi, I'm a slut too! Wanna fuck?"

He said, "OMG do you think that would work?!"

You OSU students.... :lol: !

[Axhinde]

Originally posted by StrayRogue
This was often used by me in the student bar on campus:

"Hello big-tits, looking for some action?"

What's sad is if you use it on 10 girls, 1 will probably go for I. Just depends on how many slaps your drunken pride can handle for sex.

[SiKWiDiT]

Nice shoes. Wanna fuck?

:lol2:

Funniness.

AND, the whole point of spitting game while drunk is that the slaps dont hurt until whatever sleeping implement it is that you wake up in the next morning/afternoon.

[SiKWiDiT]

I once overheard a senior citizen telling a high school chick that he wanted to lick her belly-button.

From the inside.

and while we're on the subject, you must be Jamaican, cause girl, jamaican' me hot/horny/crazy/etc.

I once overheard a senior citizen telling a high school chick that he wanted to lick her belly-button.

Hahaha, that whole hearing going with age thing must be true, i bet it took a few politely loud replies for the geezer to get the message.

[Drew]

This is one I actually use:

Walk up to girl and sound kinda embarrassed "Hey, see my friend over there" and point to one of your buddies across the room, "yeah, he's kind of shy, but he wants to know, if you think I'm cute"

[Galleazzo]

Originally posted by Wezas
"According to my magic watch, you're not wearing underwear"

<glance at the watch and tap it a few times>

"This damn thing must be an hour fast again" (gags) Man, that pwns. About the lamest pickup line in history.


What's sad is if you use it on 10 girls, 1 will probably go for I. Just depends on how many slaps your drunken pride can handle for sex.I think I posted the anecdote about the guy who'd work a singles bar with the line, "You and I are here for the same thing. We can pussyfoot around for an hour or we can go to my place to fuck. Wanna?" It was the same Rob who had the vasectomy staple line, and he had the same rate. About 1 in 10, 1 in 15, would go for it.

Now I also heard a gal once use a real cheesy line. I don't remember the exact words but it was something like "I'm so tight the GY has to use the smallest speculum examining me" and then followed up by saying that she didn't think a guy should have to use rubbers with her.

[Chadj]

Last week, I heard a friend say it, so the other day I picked out a random girl and tried it..

Me"Hey, do you know how much a polar bear weighs?"
Her"Umm.. No, how much? And who the hell are you?"
Me"Enough to break the ice. Hi, I'm Chad"

she laughed and I totally got her number.. Havn't called it yet, and I dunno if I plan to. Figured that if someone actually fell for that line, they totally weren't right in the head.

[Bobmuhthol]

The worst I've heard in a long time was someone asking to see Chadj with less clothes on.

The most disgusting, too.

[Chadj]

Statement to protect myself from someone who would kick my ass if I kept it up.

[Edited on 7-2-2004 by Chadj]

[Wezas]

Originally posted by Galleazzo
Now I also heard a gal once use a real cheesy line. I don't remember the exact words but it was something like "I'm so tight the GY has to use the smallest speculum examining me"

Yeah, that's the image a guy wants to have in his head when thinking about this girl. :D