New Pickup Lines

[MaryJane]

So I'm standing outside smoking YESTERDAY, today I would do no such thing, and this guy I work with comes up to me and we start talking about stuff.

His part of the convo, condensed: Ya, so I'm 49 years old, just got divorced, the bitch got the house so I'm stuck living back with my dad in his dining room. Anyway, I hope I'm not being too foward, you want to go out sometime?

Me: ....

[Atlanteax]

Horny old man? :shrug:

[CrystalTears]

Good lord. :down:

"So I found out that I have multiple personalities. Tell me what kind of guy you like and I'll see if he's around."

[Edited on 5/26/2004 by CrystalTears]

[Trinitis]

Big score for you! Woohoo! I'd bag it and run!

:spaz:

[Ravenstorm]

And you didn't immediately jump into bed with him why?

Raven

[Axhinde]

At least he didn't use the "Are you're parents retarded?" pickup.

i can spit better game than that. unless the sympathy thing still works

[Trinitis]

Originally posted by MaryJane
So I'm standing outside smoking YESTERDAY, today I would do no such thing, and this guy I work with comes up to me and we start talking about stuff.

His part of the convo, condensed: Ya, so I'm 49 years old, just got divorced, the bitch got the house so I'm stuck living back with my dad in his dining room. Anyway, I hope I'm not being too foward, you want to go out sometime?

Me: ....

And..on a side note.

Do you have to post EVERYTHING I do?! Sheesh!!! :sniffle:

She did Raven. The ... was the sound of her kissing him and yanking at his belt.

[Artha]

I've got to try that some time.

[Shari]

<dies laughing>

[Souzy]

Originally posted by Ravenstorm
And you didn't immediately jump into bed with him why?

Raven

They wouldn't be jumpin' in bed...more like the table. :lol:

I feel so sorry for you MJ.

[Snapp]

Wow, he's making ME hot just reading that MJ, you lucky gal!

[Apathy]

You have to remember to always be an optimist and life and look on the bright side.

If you sleep with him it's almost certain that he'll cook you breakfast, or at least roll over and get something out of the fridge!

Or better yet, now you have someone to set up on a blind date with that pseudo friend you actually despise...

<--- no morals, only standards and practices.

[Suppa Hobbit Mage]

Occasionally I'm happy to not have breasts, this would be one of those circumstances.

I really would like to know what you said though!

[Zanagodly]

Their going out this weekend

[Czeska]

Drunk Man 1: "Hey Baby.. my buddy's been diggin you all night" (guy points to his staggeringly drunk friend)

Me - "Wow, amazing, since I've been here for 5 minutes."

(guy confusedly steps aside for staggeringly drunk friend who almost falls over trying to put his arm around me as i take ONE step forward. Staggeringly drunk friend falls face first into Brick wall.)

Staggeringly drunk friend: "C***" (leaves the bar)

[Atlanteax]

How about when a guy is hitting on a girl...

She motions to hold his hands...

Then she asks "how come your right hand stronger than your left?"

:lol:

[DianaBanana]

Guy: Want a pizza and a fuck?
Girl: No
Guy: What, you dont like pizza?

heh. :nutty:

[Artha]

My repertoire...it is growing! Growing!

[MaryJane]

Sorry, took me.. so long to reply.. hit my head when I tried to climb out from under the dining room table.. wanna come to my wedding?

Do I want to ask what you were doing to him under the dinning room table?

[Hulkein]

Can't make it, but make sure to name the kid after me, thanks.

[Iriscience]

Originally posted by Atlanteax
How about when a guy is hitting on a girl...

She motions to hold his hands...

Then she asks "how come your right hand stronger than your left?"

:lol:

I was watching That 70s Show today too.

[Weedmage Princess]

:lol:

True story. Some guy was shamelessly hitting on my cousin once when she was about 8 months pregnant and wearing her wedding ring. She told him she was married, etc...this winner didn't stop...so while he's going on and on about "being able to goall night", she casually digs up her nose, pulls it out and pretends to like roll it between her fingers and play with it. She flicks it away suddenly then turns back to the guy and says, "Now what were you saying?" He goes, "Damn." and just walks away. I don't think I'll ever get over that one as long as I live..heh.

Originally posted by Hulkein
Can't make it, but make sure to name the kid after me, thanks.

Just think You will have Hulkamania right in your own home!

[Atlanteax]

Originally posted by Weedmage Princess
:lol:

True story. Some guy was shamelessly hitting on my cousin once when she was about 8 months pregnant and wearing her wedding ring. She told him she was married, etc...this winner didn't stop...so while he's going on and on about "being able to goall night", she casually digs up her nose, pulls it out and pretends to like roll it between her fingers and play with it. She flicks it away suddenly then turns back to the guy and says, "Now what were you saying?" He goes, "Damn." and just walks away. I don't think I'll ever get over that one as long as I live..heh.

You'd have to wonder what she would have to do, to get rid of him... if it didn't work. :nutty:

Or, even worse, it impressed him. :scared:

[Edaarin]

"I'm a level 70 rogue Guildmaster in an online video game, will you have sex with me?"

For some reason it didn't work. WTF

[SiKWiDiT]

'Nice shoes, wanna fuck?'

Fifty-fifty odds on this one. Depends on where you're at, who you're talking to, and how long they've been at the bar.

[MaryJane]

Originally posted by SiKWiDiT
'Nice shoes, wanna fuck?'

Fifty-fifty odds on this one. Depends on where you're at, who you're talking to, and how long they've been at the bar.

I've used it!!!!!

[SiKWiDiT]

Did it work?

[MaryJane]

I'm a woman.. what do you think..:smug: