Should I grow a beard?

[j43d3n]

I've been thinking about growing a beard. Everyone else at mosque has a beard, I feel left out. Growing a beard is an important part of being a Muslim and will hopefully earn me respect within the community.

http://www.muslimaccess.com/articles/misc/beard_in_islam.asp



Thus, a Muslim who shaves or shortens his beard is like a hermaphrodite, his Imamate near prohibition, his evidence is not valid, he will not have the right to vote or being voted for. Shaving and shortening the beard is the action of non-believers.

any beard-related advice?

[Warriorbird]

You can't grow a beard. Stop lying.

[Stanley Burrell]

any beard-related advice?

Yes.

In the words of Imam Epic bin Beard Man:

http://img20.imageshack.us/img20/2247/epicbeardmanvideointerv.jpg

"HOW MUCH FOR A SHOE SHINE OLOLOLOLOLOLOL?"

[Durgrimst]

If everyone else at your mosque puts on a suicide vest will you do it?

It will earn you respect within your community and in your afterlife you will get something that you never got from your marriage....... a female virgin.

[Mighty Nikkisaurus]

You should grow a bear and attach it to your face. You could use elmer's glue, or you could smear bacon grease all over your face for a firmer, more permanent hold.

[peam]

I'm issuing a fatwa barring these dumb-ass farcical accounts.

I can do that because I'm a fat guy.

[j43d3n]

Durgrmist should learn to show respect to his fellow human beings. It is most unwise to provoke the wrath of Islam. Evidence follows:


Amongst the fitrat (Deen) of Islam is the cutting of the moustache and the lengthening of the beard for surely the Majoos lengthen their moustaches and cut their beards so oppose them by cutting your moustaches and lengthening your beards.

I am no expert on history, but there are no records or even passing mentions of "Majoos". It is as if they never existed. This is because we wiped their sin off the face of the world, for defying our beard customs.

You have been warned.