Old great auction pants:

[Fluffel]

These pants have all the actions of the original pants, they open and close, weigh under a pound and....

dusty grey linen pants

>look in my pants
In the grey linen pants you see a small embroidered label.
>look label
Discreetly located on the trousers, the label is embroidered with fuschia thread in an elegant, flowing script.
There appears to be something written on it.
>read label
In the Common language, it reads:
Ahab the One Eyed Lizard's Lair
Private for my privates.
Keep out!

[thefarmer]

These pants have all the actions of the original pants, they open and close, weigh under a pound and....

dusty grey linen pants

>look in my pants
In the grey linen pants you see a small embroidered label.
>look label
Discreetly located on the trousers, the label is embroidered with fuschia thread in an elegant, flowing script.
There appears to be something written on it.
>read label
In the Common language, it reads:
Ahab the One Eyed Lizard's Lair
Private for my privates.
Keep out!

Since I have a pair (1 of 3) of the first released scripted pants, I'm curious what you mean by 'actions of the original pants'.