Mint
03-12-2004, 11:52 PM
I didn’t write this but wish I had. Do you see your own posting style in any of these?
1. Post a message asking how to post messages.
2. Post a new thread of old posts from a thread that died months ago with a title such as "*** HAS JOE SMITH FORGOTTEN HIS LIES? ***"
3. Determine a perversion so bizarre or obscure that it doesn't yet have its own sex group.
4. Follow up a 200-line post to add only your signature.
5. Correct every spelling mistake you encounter, but misspell the word "imbecile" in your followup flames.
6. Flame yourself, and complain to the mods.
7. Ask any other member when they last had dates.
8. Post your trig homework and ask the members to post you the answers.
9. Provoke insightful and productive debates on fresh new topics such as abortion, gun control, the existence of God, penile circumcision, and the relative superiority of Mac or PC operating systems.
10. Maintain a high-level of constructive decorum by addressing someone with whom you disagree as "monkey boy."
11. Post whining, misspelled, and vaguely creepy personal information in wildly inappropriate threads, and followup to berate the members for not responding.
12. Construct a device that lets your pets post to Player’s Corner by pawing or pecking a feeder bar.
13. Eliminate nearly all meaningful traffic in other threads for weeks by challenging the members to come up with as many synonyms as possible for the word vomit.
14. Claim that you can see "hidden images" in another person's posting when you cross your eyes.
15. Ask Austrian readers about kangaroos.
16. Ask Australian readers about alpine skiing.
17. Include Rush lyrics or Rush quotes in all your posts.
18. Accuse female posters of being male.
19. Insist that anyone objecting to your compulsive fascination with consuming the flesh of strangled disabled minors is "judgemental."
20. If you've grown tired of typing, effectively end a thread by accusing others of being Nazis.
21. Write and regularly post a FAQ about yourself.
22. Post graphic descriptions of your bowel movements, genital sores, and various suppurating wounds.
23. Insist that there's no such state in the U.S. as "New Mexico."
24. Why use a single question mark or exclamation point when you can use at least thirty?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
25. Insult a poster from another nation based on his country's performance in World War II.
26. Regardless of its accuracy, followup another post with the line "BZZZT! Wrong answer!".
27. Steer all debates to your own pet subjects of expertise, regardless of their relevance.
28. Make it clear from your postings that you've a profound inability to distinguish "The X Files" as fiction.
29. Insist that another poster is really Teeoncy or Klaive.
30. Insinuate vague conspiracies in all your posts.
31. POST IN ALL CAPS
32. omit all punctuation
33. omitallspaces
34. DOALLTHREEOFTHEABOVE
35. Strive to ensure that no two consecutive words in your posts are correctly spelled.
36. Enrich the lives of hundreds with a thoughtful and impassioned debate on the topic "AOL users suck."
37. Dispense essential and priceless financial advice, such as the assertion that no one is legally required to pay taxes.
38. Followup another person's posts every twelve minutes to accuse them of "obsessing."
39. Followup two dozen of another person's posts to accuse them of harassing you. Send copious U2U’s if you're ignored.
40. Start pointless debates over topics such as whether Whoopi Goldberg has eyebrows, what happens when you cross the International Dateline, and whether the bad guy in Popeye cartoons was named "Bluto" or "Brutus."
1. Post a message asking how to post messages.
2. Post a new thread of old posts from a thread that died months ago with a title such as "*** HAS JOE SMITH FORGOTTEN HIS LIES? ***"
3. Determine a perversion so bizarre or obscure that it doesn't yet have its own sex group.
4. Follow up a 200-line post to add only your signature.
5. Correct every spelling mistake you encounter, but misspell the word "imbecile" in your followup flames.
6. Flame yourself, and complain to the mods.
7. Ask any other member when they last had dates.
8. Post your trig homework and ask the members to post you the answers.
9. Provoke insightful and productive debates on fresh new topics such as abortion, gun control, the existence of God, penile circumcision, and the relative superiority of Mac or PC operating systems.
10. Maintain a high-level of constructive decorum by addressing someone with whom you disagree as "monkey boy."
11. Post whining, misspelled, and vaguely creepy personal information in wildly inappropriate threads, and followup to berate the members for not responding.
12. Construct a device that lets your pets post to Player’s Corner by pawing or pecking a feeder bar.
13. Eliminate nearly all meaningful traffic in other threads for weeks by challenging the members to come up with as many synonyms as possible for the word vomit.
14. Claim that you can see "hidden images" in another person's posting when you cross your eyes.
15. Ask Austrian readers about kangaroos.
16. Ask Australian readers about alpine skiing.
17. Include Rush lyrics or Rush quotes in all your posts.
18. Accuse female posters of being male.
19. Insist that anyone objecting to your compulsive fascination with consuming the flesh of strangled disabled minors is "judgemental."
20. If you've grown tired of typing, effectively end a thread by accusing others of being Nazis.
21. Write and regularly post a FAQ about yourself.
22. Post graphic descriptions of your bowel movements, genital sores, and various suppurating wounds.
23. Insist that there's no such state in the U.S. as "New Mexico."
24. Why use a single question mark or exclamation point when you can use at least thirty?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
25. Insult a poster from another nation based on his country's performance in World War II.
26. Regardless of its accuracy, followup another post with the line "BZZZT! Wrong answer!".
27. Steer all debates to your own pet subjects of expertise, regardless of their relevance.
28. Make it clear from your postings that you've a profound inability to distinguish "The X Files" as fiction.
29. Insist that another poster is really Teeoncy or Klaive.
30. Insinuate vague conspiracies in all your posts.
31. POST IN ALL CAPS
32. omit all punctuation
33. omitallspaces
34. DOALLTHREEOFTHEABOVE
35. Strive to ensure that no two consecutive words in your posts are correctly spelled.
36. Enrich the lives of hundreds with a thoughtful and impassioned debate on the topic "AOL users suck."
37. Dispense essential and priceless financial advice, such as the assertion that no one is legally required to pay taxes.
38. Followup another person's posts every twelve minutes to accuse them of "obsessing."
39. Followup two dozen of another person's posts to accuse them of harassing you. Send copious U2U’s if you're ignored.
40. Start pointless debates over topics such as whether Whoopi Goldberg has eyebrows, what happens when you cross the International Dateline, and whether the bad guy in Popeye cartoons was named "Bluto" or "Brutus."