A girl at a bar wrote me a poem last night...

[Sean of the Thread]

I have a habit of speaking with almost anyone that I notice that I've not spoken with and as a result end up having interesting encounters. (Also why I know 1 million people and should run for mayor).

Anyways this girl was cute so I talked with her blah blah before they called me over for my turn at VIDEO BOWLING (sweet). About 10 minutes later she brought me this over.

WTF.

In hindsight I should have put my penis in her. (Unless her va jay jay was full on hippy 1970 BUSH).


Like literally on artsy paper and all.

To: Sean
From: Candace

get through this
over to the other side
the rainbow and the zen
as the only way to see it
It's the reason you were born
It's the fabric of the guilt that is
your life
Becoming
Blooming towards ever lasting
DEATH COME AS A FOUNTAIN
Free me from this maze
except the things are right now
this spot that I am in
you will NEVER know any of it because
it's written my soul like a thousand
knives pouring into the bades of fall
my comrades singing through the
hills about the
MAJESTIC MOUNTAIN
where you'll be one fine day
when you see yourself
YOU AS YOU REALLY ARE
and nothing can compare to
what will be known by you and
all your greatness
you are they and we and us and it
and her and him and GOD AND BUDDHA
and when we meet there on the

Horizon . . . . .


PEACE

and you will never know






yeah uhm wtf

[Jayvn]

Yeah...it's a good thing you didn't try to put your penis in that one.. Do you EVER watch scary movies? that's how homocidal serial killer girls are... she was going to make a face mask out of your penis skin, and the skins of many other men.

[Jayvn]

jesus man...I read that 'poem' again...that's some creepy overtones

[g++]

Did backlash hack seans account?

[Sean of the Thread]

She really didn't seem under the influence at all unless it was like SHROOMS or some shit.

And yeah there are some creepy overtones.

And yes WB I am a people person. I even go up to the scary biker guy sitting in the corner that everybody avoided and turns out he's just a fucking awesome quiet guy.

Normally when I walk into anyplace from Clearwater beach to Tarpon Springs I get a resounding "HEY <last name>!>" from a shit load of people and rarely have to buy my own drinks.

And remarkably only a few enemies out of them all although I've made great friends with people who once hated me and my outgoing attitude.

Although I drop the c bomb on some lady saturday night but she started it. I just finished it.

[LMingrone]

Something kind of similar happened to me the other day. Honestly one of the oddest moments of my life.

So I Got in a argument and drove down to the beach to just relax in my car, have a smoke, and listen to some music. Since I was in a pissy mood I was listening to Tool extremely loud in my car. This woman, who must have been 50+ years old, walks over to my window and leans in my car. So I turn my shit down and she's asking me to turn it back up "That's beautiful music." she says.

I knew she was drunk as hell and I was bored so I wanted to see where this would go. So I start talking to this woman (this whole thing was probably over an hour long).

She whips out a drawing pad and starts drawing me pictures of dogs. I'm laughing in my head of course. Then she goes on about her life story and tells me about her piano playing. Being a jerk I tell her I have a band and PWN at guitar. Of course, Lies, I can't play shit. So she's asking me if I can come to her house for dinner and "train" (wtf?) her. For some reason creepy old women are always hitting on me.

She then starts giving me her number, email, and address. Finally I got freaked out when she's telling me I know her sons from Indiana. Uhh, no. So I lie again and say I had to go to work. Had to peel out real quick cause the bitch was trying to get into my car. Then, no lie, she starts running down the road following me screaming "Larry! Larry! Come back! You don't know your way around here! I need to give you directions! LARRY LARRY COME BACCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKK!".

Needless to say, my mood was much better after that. Was pretty surreal.

Edit: hah, just found one of the pictures she drew me. A piano with water coming from it, that is dripping on a dog's head. The dog is then drooling on a rabbit that is sitting on the North pole with a carrot orbiting the earth. I'll snap a picture of it later.

[Xaerve]

Is your name Larry?

[ElvenFury]

http://www.terragame.com/cdgames/pc_adv/leisure_suit_larry_uncut_uncensored/screen_1.jpg

[LMingrone]

Yes it is. Idiot for telling her that. But I told her my last name was Poofdavagdragon. also told her my number was 911-0000. Feel bad for the 911 people that night.

[Asha]

What's the ratio of the random guy being awesome and the random guy filling your face in like last time?
(nevermind you answered that already. I personally can't understand why some people are dicks to nice guys but whatever)
Also, picking up (in any way) lone chicks in a bar hardly ever works out. They're usually lone for a very, very good fucking reason.

[Alfster]

Sean welcome to the world of crazies. Haha. God damn dude.

[Sean of the Thread]

hahaha at the responses.

And dray I did take down one dude with a throat chop but he initiated that shit as well.

[Ignot]

I have a habit of speaking with almost anyone that I notice that I've not spoken with and as a result end up having interesting encounters. (Also why I know 1 million people and should run for mayor).

Anyways this girl was cute so I talked with her blah blah before they called me over for my turn at VIDEO BOWLING (sweet). About 10 minutes later she brought me this over.

WTF.

In hindsight I should have put my penis in her. (Unless her va jay jay was full on hippy 1970 BUSH).


Like literally on artsy paper and all.

To: Sean
From: Candace

get through this
over to the other side
the rainbow and the zen
as the only way to see it
It's the reason you were born
It's the fabric of the guilt that is
your life
Becoming
Blooming towards ever lasting
DEATH COME AS A FOUNTAIN
Free me from this maze
except the things are right now
this spot that I am in
you will NEVER know any of it because
it's written my soul like a thousand
knives pouring into the bades of fall
my comrades singing through the
hills about the
MAJESTIC MOUNTAIN
where you'll be one fine day
when you see yourself
YOU AS YOU REALLY ARE
and nothing can compare to
what will be known by you and
all your greatness
you are they and we and us and it
and her and him and GOD AND BUDDHA
and when we meet there on the

Horizon . . . . .


PEACE

and you will never know






yeah uhm wtf


Wow, this could only happen to you.

[Sean of the Thread]

Is your name Larry?


no his name is Sean2jr

[Stanley Burrell]

Maybe she was just messing with you.

Write her a poem back that's all,

"It is you I am missing,
We were in the clouds kissing,
You can't escape me,
Please, God, rape me."

Also, you need to wear a shit ton of bling so this doesn't happen and you can get with the sistaz who have the fine bagodonkaladonks.

[Asha]

And dray I did take down one dude with a throat chop but he initiated that shit as well.

Hahahahah fucking class

[Skeeter]

I think you should marry her Sean.

[Sean of the Thread]

I think you should marry her Sean.

But then I'd be cheating on your wife.

[iJin]

lolo. Oh god Sean.

[Gan]

You sure that wasn't Backlash in drag?

[Nieninque]

You sure that wasn't Backlash in drag?


That's a mental image I didn't need.

[Skeeter]

But then I'd be cheating on your wife.

Ha I know you're lying because my wife doesn't drive on the highway!

:hug2:

[Sean of the Thread]

<----douchebag

[Methais]

Normally when I walk into anyplace from Clearwater beach to Tarpon Springs I get a resounding "HEY <last name>!>" from a shit load of people

http://www.talkingnfl.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/10/c_norm_04.JPG

Keep this poem in your pocket to give to her in case you run into her again:

Roses are red
Violets are blue
In Soviet Russia
Poem writes you!

[Warriorbird]

Just drop some Frederick Seidel on her. Women flee.

From Poem by the Bridge at Ten-Shin



We knocked back shots of single malt all night.
Beer chasers gave dos caballeros double vision, second sight—
Twin putti pissing out the hotel window on the Scottish dawn.
A crocodile has fallen for a fawn.
I live flap copy for a children’s book.
He wants to lick. He wants to look.
A tiny goldfinch is his Cupid.
Love of cuntry makes men stupid.

[Sean of the Thread]

I now seriously hope I do not run into this girl again loaded with this ammunition.

[Warriorbird]

Yeah. With her I think you might end up married.

[NocturnalRob]

you may not see her, but she's definitely watching you...

[Methais]

you may not see her, but she's definitely watching you...

http://www.forumspile.com/funnay/Surprise-Sex.jpg

[Warriorbird]

I now seriously hope I do not run into this girl again loaded with this ammunition.

Seidel's like the Old Dirty Bastard of the poetry world if Old Dirty Bastard were an old independently wealthy white guy who loved Ducatis.

Here's the source. I love the last stanza especially.

http://www.newyorker.com/fiction/poetry/2008/10/20/081020po_poem_seidel

[NocturnalRob]

Seidel's like the Old Dirty Bastard of the poetry world if Old Dirty Bastard were an old independently wealthy white guy who loved Ducatis.

Here's the source. I love the last stanza especially.

http://www.newyorker.com/fiction/poetry/2008/10/20/081020po_poem_seidel
agreed. that's pretty legit.