Movie summaries in 3 words.

[Skeeter]

summarize a movie in 3 words.

I'll start.


Old Yeller dies.

[Jahira]

Golem Destroys Ring

[thefarmer]

Tom Cruise fails

[Gan]

I'll be back.

[Numbers]

Vader's his father.

[Jorddyn]

She's a guy.

[Back]

Karate Kid wins.

[Jorddyn]

The ship sinks.

[Jahira]

Kid sees dead.

[MotleyCrew]

Why so serious?

[diethx]

Rosebud's a sled.

[Celephais]

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v223/alexthegreat/OllieWilliams.jpg
IT GONNA RAIN!

[Celephais]

http://www.perfectduluthday.com/BadAssMotherFuckerWallet.JPG

[Jorddyn]

Happily Ever After


Bonus: Works for every freaking Disney movie

[Stretch]

Debbie does Dallas.

Wait, what?

[The Ponzzz]

The dog dies (Marley & Me).

[Back]

Shark go boom!

[diethx]

Alcohol, sex, death.

(Every horror movie, ever.)

[Celephais]

He is Tyler

[diethx]

As you wish.

(edit: okay so I guess that's not really a summary but I love that movie :heart:)

[Celephais]

The Story ends.

[Jorddyn]

Bob marries Lily.
Earth is safe.
She's the Jackal.
They get home.

Random selections from my collection.

[diethx]

The Story ends.

You aren't talking about Neverending Story, are you? Cuz if so, fail. THE STORY NEVER ENDS.

[Stunseed]

Snape kills Dumbledore.

Rocky Balboa loses.
Rocky Balboa wins.
Mr. T gets beat.
Drago kills Apollo.
Rocky wears diapers.
Rocky needs cane.

YOU ARE NEXT! ( Bloodsport )

[Celephais]

You aren't talking about Neverending Story, are you? Cuz if so, fail. THE STORY NEVER ENDS.
NOPE! It ends!!!!

Gelfling restores crystal.

Rug ties room.

[Jorddyn]

Rug ties room.

The dude abides.

[diethx]

NOPE! It ends!!!!

WROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG SIR WRONG

[Skeeter]

Jason didn't drown

[Skeeter]

Death Star explodes.

[Skeeter]

Nerds get girls

[diethx]

Don't fall asleep.

[Celephais]

NPH catches Supervaginabug.

[diethx]

Verbal is Soze.

[Skeeter]

Truman's life fake!

Delinquent Alex "cured" (clockwork orange)

[Celephais]

Damn the Man.
(Save the empire)

[Ignot]

I LIKE TURTLES!

[Sean]

ass to ass

[Celephais]

I know kungfu

[Suppa Hobbit Mage]

Why so serious?

This is full of win.

Ass 2 Mouth

[Drew]

Kills his father (Wanted)

[Drew]

Runs convenience store

[Drew]

Finkle is Einhorn

[Sean]

Alliance made reavers

[Drew]

Harrison escapes (sorta)

[Drew]

Harrison saves plane

[Drew]

Harrison kills replicants

[Sean]

Sampson killed killer

[TheEschaton]

Pitt is Anger.

[Drew]

Alliance made reavers

Nice!

[Celephais]

Runs convenience store
Sucked 36 dicks

[Mateius]

Angelina stole Brad

[Rimalon]

It's a walkoff.

http://www.geocities.com/ucsdjib/zoolander.jpg

[DCSL]

Zombies eat everyone.

The couple survives. (This one isn't exactly from a specific movie, just an expression of my frustration that the dumb couple almost always survives. BAH. They would be my first targets!)

Aliens fear water.

[diethx]

Aliens fear water.

Fuck that movie was awful.

[DCSL]

You're damn right it was. The only part I liked/appreciated was the kid's birthday part in South America, where the alien casually walked past the walkway or whatever. More horrific artistry in that moment then in the entire rest of the film. For me, anyway.

[diethx]

What the fuck movie are you talking about? I thought you meant Signs.

[DCSL]

Yep, talking about Signs. Watch it again. The kid's birthday party where they show handcam footage of an alien step from one bush to another with all the kids and women yelling in Spanish in the background.

[diethx]

Oh that must've been on the news or something. Yeah i'm not watching that crap again, i'll take your word for it.

[Gan]

"Bond, James Bond."

"Doc Tah Jones!"

"I speak jive."


Germs kill aliens.

The unsinkable, sinks.

ET phone home.

Live long, (and) prosper.

Use the force.

[MotleyCrew]

He's Bourne again.

[thefarmer]

New pearl necklace

[Enceladus]

Brooks was here.

Yippy-kai-yay mother fucker.

[Drevihyin]

I'm your huckleberry

[Methais]

Go fuck yourself (The Departed)

[TheEschaton]

Feel lucky, punk?
Man on Island
Denzel rocks Godzilla
Thorton and Berry?!?

[Mateius]

It's Morphing Time!

[Mateius]

The 3 seashells

[Mateius]

2 gay cowboys

[Kyra231]

Let 'er buck.

Roaches check in...

[CrystalTears]

Yeah, you blend.

[Beguiler]

We've got bush!

[CrystalTears]

The greater good.

[NocturnalRob]

Will Smith sucks

[CrystalTears]

Dude and Sweet

[Stanley Burrell]

Man, you guys did all the good movies.

Platoon kills Vietnamese.

Vietnamese kills platoon.



Um.



Me-Tie Dough-ty Walker?

[AnticorRifling]

I'm your father.

[Jorddyn]

Priest out window.

[CrystalTears]

Blood splattered prom.

[NocturnalRob]

Samuel Jackson yells

[Stanley Burrell]

Ark kills Nazis

Gets stone back.







The other two. Bullwhip, fedora, ophidiophobia.

[SolitareConfinement]

Blood splattered prom.

girl uses psychokinesis?

[Stanley Burrell]

Globetrotting grizzled archealogist.

[Stanley Burrell]

I hate snakes.

[SolitareConfinement]

spiders dominate hicks

[NocturnalRob]

spiders dominate hicks
nail gun wtfpwns

[Stanley Burrell]

Amish children psycopaths?

[Stanley Burrell]

Pumpkin King Antichrist

[CrystalTears]

Just keep swimming.

[SolitareConfinement]

edward trims bushes

[g++]

white kills orange

[Drew]

Snakes on plane.

[Some Rogue]

Sucked 36 dicks

In a row?

[g++]

motherfuckin samuel jackson

fixed

[SolitareConfinement]

Davey Jones dies

[CrystalTears]

Pictures of dicks.

[Some Rogue]

Damn dirty apes

Hannibal Lecter escapes

[Stanley Burrell]

Smile you son-of-a-bitch.

[CrystalTears]

Smile you son-of-a-bitch.
Cheater.

[Stanley Burrell]

Hannibal Lecter escapes

Lotion in basket.

[Stanley Burrell]

Cheater.

Boils pet rabbit.

[Some Rogue]

Anakin is annoying
Anakin turns emo
Anakin becomes Vader

[SolitareConfinement]

borat loves pam

michael becomes godfather

jesus had sex (and a baby apparently)

emily rose dies

[NocturnalRob]

Mahoney pulls pranks

[NocturnalRob]

Wild Thing rules

[NocturnalRob]

Greed is good

[SolitareConfinement]

air kills people



note: worst movie i've ever fucking seen btw

[NocturnalRob]

Smells like Gelfling

[NocturnalRob]

Spice must flow

[g++]

air kills people



note: worst movie i've ever fucking seen btw

Yah i watched it with my friend and his girl friend and she loved it. We both went out to smoke later and agreed hes having sex with an idiot.

[NocturnalRob]

hahaha

[Stanley Burrell]

Dan Morino Kidnapped.

Pawns beheaded parrot.

Rhinoceros gives birth.

Mask grants fantasies.

Psychotic cableman protagonist.

Truman finds out.

Lawyer can't lie.

Amnesiac rediscovers Winslett.

Freeman is God.

[SolitareConfinement]

47 wtfpwns everyone

[NocturnalRob]

Travolta dances disco

[DeV]

Whore-bits in orbit - Vampire Whores From Outer Space
Rammed and slammed - The Wrestler
Temujin defeats defeat - Mongol
You die now - Death Proof
Milk promotes homogenization - Harvey Milk
Lesions R Us - Cabin Fever

to be continued...

[SolitareConfinement]

Lesions R Us - Cabin Fever


i seen this in my collection of movies and was going to some how use it but couldn't think of a decent way to describe in 3 words.....well done

on topic not 3 words but fuck it:
hoo-hah

[Fallen]

Leloo Dallas Multi-pass.

[NocturnalRob]

Leloo Dallas Multi-pass.
/thread

[DeV]

Big Badda Boom

[Xeromist]

McFly pwns Biff
As you wish
Not a tumor!
Heeey yooou guuuys

[NocturnalRob]

Your move, creep

[Carl Spackler]

Tron Funkin Blow

[Sean]

Wild Thing rules

Willie Mays Hayes

[Some Rogue]

Mexican stripper vampires

[NocturnalRob]

Mexican stripper vampires
Sex Machine's crotchgun

[LadyLaphrael]

Aloha, Mr. Hand

[CrystalTears]

Creepy goth family

[Clove]

Snakes on airplane!!!!!

[Some Rogue]

Costner delivers mail.

[Beguiler]

dances with disco-ball

[CrystalTears]

Austin loses mojo.

[NocturnalRob]

Costner's a fish-man

[Some Rogue]

Hanks befriends volleyball.
Private Ryan lives.

[NocturnalRob]

Costner builds diamond

[NocturnalRob]

Costner bang Sarandon

[NocturnalRob]

Costner bangs Russo

[NocturnalRob]

Costner goes Indian

[Some Rogue]

Geeks build woman.

Pacino is devil.

[NocturnalRob]

Costner is untouchable

[NocturnalRob]

Jim Carrey lies

[Some Rogue]

Karl kills Doyle.

[NocturnalRob]

The Triple Lindy

[Clove]

Debbie. Does. Dallas.

[CrystalTears]

Drink red pill

[NocturnalRob]

Debbie does Dallas.

Debbie. Does. Dallas.
shhh...

[Clove]

Sucked 36 dicks37!

[Clove]

Persia gets pwnd

[CrystalTears]

Persia gets pwnd
This is Sparta!!

[NocturnalRob]

Persia gets pwnd
I would have preferred "This is Sparta" or "Farrell wears eye-liner" because are you talking about 300 or Alexander?

This is Sparta!!
:yeahthat:

[Beguiler]

Einhorn's a man!

[NocturnalRob]

Einhorn's a man!
we would also have accepted "Laces out, Dan!!"

[CrystalTears]

I would have preferred "This is Sparta" or "Farrell wears eye-liner" because are you talking about 300 or Alexander?


we would also have accepted "Laces out, Dan!!"
Who made you the judge? Quit it! :tongue:

[NocturnalRob]

Who made you the judge? Quit it! :tongue:
no. you quit it!!

[Spazztasim]

exploding heart technique

[Spazztasim]

prostitute doesn't kiss
princess is ogre

[Spazztasim]

three samurai survive
twelve men acquit

White Castle acquired
Kazakh bags Pamela

[Spazztasim]

I can do these all day!

grandma sinks diamond
Brando, buffalo, slaughtered
girl defeats Huns
orca defeats wall
oompa motherfucking loompas

[Spazztasim]

Extra credit if you get this one:

Indian Laura Roslin?!?!

[CrystalTears]

Extra credit if you get this one:

Indian Laura Roslin?!?!
Buffalo meat good

[NocturnalRob]

Extra credit if you get this one:

Indian Laura Roslin?!?!
motherfucker, i already did this one. and fuck roslin. kevin costner is the man

[CrystalTears]

motherfucker, i already did this one. and fuck roslin. kevin costner is the man
Kevin Costner is the man, and Will Smith sucks?

I will never trust your movie criticisms ever again.

[NocturnalRob]

Kevin Costner is the man, and Will Smith sucks?

I will never trust your movie criticisms ever again.
you damn dirty rican slut, how dare you!??!

name a good movie that will smith has been in. please. do it.

oh wait...I can name one--Ali. That was back in 2001. Then before that...Independence Day? But not because he acted well (same exact acting as Bad Boys I/II, MIB I/II, Hitch, Hancock, I Am Legend), but rather because we wtfpwnd some alien fuckers. And that was in 1996.

He is and always will be the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. He plays a cocky, gangly black dude from Philly who is moved out of his element and the shenanigans that ensue over a laugh track.

Will Smith can choke on yak semen. That guy sucks.

/rant

[CrystalTears]

name a good movie that will smith has been in. please. do it.
The Pursuit of Happyness

[NocturnalRob]

The Pursuit of Happyness
oh sweet jesus that movie was a overly sentimental piece of shit.

[Androidpk]

The Jews escape.

[CrystalTears]

oh sweet jesus that movie was a overly sentimental piece of shit.
Just because YOU didn't like it doesn't make it a bad movie. It was a good movie with good acting. Get over it.

Back on topic for those who like normal movies:

Pregnant teenager musician

[NocturnalRob]

fine.

baby leaves corner

[Some Rogue]

Hillbillies rape outsiders.

[NocturnalRob]

They all die

[Androidpk]

Teens go ultraviolent.

[radamanthys]

you damn dirty rican slut, how dare you!??!

name a good movie that will smith has been in. please. do it.

oh wait...I can name one--Ali. That was back in 2001. Then before that...Independence Day? But not because he acted well (same exact acting as Bad Boys I/II, MIB I/II, Hitch, Hancock, I Am Legend), but rather because we wtfpwnd some alien fuckers. And that was in 1996.

He is and always will be the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. He plays a cocky, gangly black dude from Philly who is moved out of his element and the shenanigans that ensue over a laugh track.

Will Smith can choke on yak semen. That guy sucks.

/rant



The robots pwn.
Aliens on earth.

I, Robot was great. Men in Black was awesome. As was enemy of the state. 6 degrees of sep was an interesting turn, and did well (critically) back in the day.

[CrystalTears]

Homeless turned broker. :D

[Some Rogue]

Cannibalistic Texas family

[radamanthys]

Who wants some?

Klaatu... Veratta... Nickel?

[NocturnalRob]

Klaatu... Veratta... Nickel?
hahaha...nice one

Needlenose Ned Ryerson

[NocturnalRob]

Number Johnny Five

[Spazztasim]

motherfucker, i already did this one. and fuck roslin. kevin costner is the man

Haha. Sorrrrry!! I missed it. (Mine is still better though.)

[Spazztasim]

ass to ass

If that's Requiem for a Dream... well done!

[Spazztasim]

Elderly Lesbian Predator.

[Methais]

Vader's Luke's dad.

[Drew]

oh sweet jesus that movie was a overly sentimental piece of shit.

Mawkish is the word you are looking for I think.

[NocturnalRob]

Mawkish is the word you are looking for I think.
nice one. maudlin is a good one too, but mawkish...you win.

[Spazztasim]

Will Smith is garbage. Try to sit through Seven Pounds, and you'll see what I mean. Also, let us not forget Wild Wild West.

[Stanley Burrell]

You all thought ID4 and MiB (the first one) were the shits when you saw them in theaters for the first time.



Titanic. Was overrated.

[CrystalTears]

Don't confuse the actor with a crappy script/movie/direction.

[MotleyCrew]

We we're young

Wallace kicks ass

Nine travel far

Harry learns magic

[Drew]

I enjoy big Willy style all in it. He's not the best actor but he normally delivers the goods I think. He was good in I Am Legend I think.

[Liagala]

Number Johnny Five

Win.


power of voodoo
Welcome to Rylos
no more Mr-Nice-Duck

[CrystalTears]

Welcome to Rylos:heart:
I just saw this a day or so ago.

Rats can cook.

[NocturnalRob]

Ugly one-horned mule

[Mateius]

To all the Will Smith haters, The Game says it best:

"it's summertime shout out to Will Smith, cause who didn't wanna be the fresh prince flat top gold chain and some fresh kicks?"

[Mateius]

cum styled hair
Franks and beans!


ive yet to laugh as hard in a theatre since this movie came out.

[Ignot]

Ugly one-horned mule

awesome.

[CrystalTears]

Disguised sex donkey

[Ignot]

Don't confuse the actor with a crappy script/movie/direction.

I think part of being a good actor is picking good roles, also.

[CrystalTears]

I think part of being a good actor is picking good roles, also.
Actors will pick bad movies from time to time. It doesn't make them a bad actor.

[Mighty Nikkisaurus]

Why, hello Clarice.

[DCSL]

I like "Surprise donkey sex." more.

[Cephalopod]

Snakes on aircraft.

DO YOU SEE?

Poster hides hope

Robot holds hands

Wins love daily / SPAM AND REESES

Lucky cop, waitress

Fight evil Canada

Gratuitous puppet sex

Man loves doll (Mannequin? Lars and the Real Doll?)

I kinda suck at this.

[Ashlander]

I am Ironman?

[NocturnalRob]

Stallone's the law

[DeV]

Hello little friend - Scarface
Shoot don't talk - Good, Bad, Ugly
Vengeance Is Mine - Gladiator
Rape the Rapists - Descent
Wrinkled arthritic baby - Benjamin Button

... to be contd

[NocturnalRob]

Yoko shuts cakehole

[NocturnalRob]

Brothers gotta hug

[TheEschaton]

Dysfunction in van.

[Cephalopod]

http://i42.tinypic.com/2ajvuz6.jpg

Two movies at once -- a picture is worth six words.

[TheEschaton]

http://i42.tinypic.com/2ajvuz6.jpg

Two movies at once -- a picture is worth six words.

/thread

[Back]

Two movies. Two words.

Bill Killed.

[Jorddyn]

Random 80s:
Andie gets boy.
Claire gets boy.
Sam gets boy.
Max comes home.
Doctor. Doctor. Doctor.
Edward kills Jim.
Man loves brain.
Bum in mansion.
Barbara gets everything.
Dukes go down.

[Fallen]

Khan has wrath

[Beguiler]

Make it so!

[Skeeter]

Bogey left lonely. (casablanca)

[Spazztasim]

Don't confuse the actor with a crappy script/movie/direction.

Ignot beat me to the punch. You're correct to observe that for any particular bad film, you have to consider how well the actor performs given the circumstances.

However, in aggregate, there is definitely a correlation between the quality of the roles and scripts that an actor is offered, and the quality of the actor. Especially, if the actor is as A-list as Willy.

So listing a whole bunch of crappy movies featuring an actor is a valid way to suggest the crappiness of the actor.

Also, don't confuse the handsomeness of an actor with his ability?

[Spazztasim]

milkshakes and oil

[diethx]

Yah i watched it with my friend and his girl friend and she loved it. We both went out to smoke later and agreed hes having sex with an idiot.

What movie was this?


So listing a whole bunch of crappy movies featuring an actor is a valid way to suggest the crappiness of the actor.

Also, don't confuse the handsomeness of an actor with his ability?

So what whole bunch of crappy movies did you list other than Seven Pounds and Wild Wild West?

Also, lol at thinking that CT is confusing his looks with his skills. I like Will Smith, even if Wild Wild West was a POS.

[Spazztasim]

Cf.


you damn dirty rican slut, how dare you!??!

name a good movie that will smith has been in. please. do it.

oh wait...I can name one--Ali. That was back in 2001. Then before that...Independence Day? But not because he acted well (same exact acting as Bad Boys I/II, MIB I/II, Hitch, Hancock, I Am Legend), but rather because we wtfpwnd some alien fuckers. And that was in 1996.

He is and always will be the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. He plays a cocky, gangly black dude from Philly who is moved out of his element and the shenanigans that ensue over a laugh track.

Will Smith can choke on yak semen. That guy sucks.

/rant

[Ignot]

Would you kindly?

(okay not a movie but it's still good.)

[diethx]

Cf.

ROFL, just because Costner-lover over there has crap taste in movies, doesn't mean those are all bad. In fact, the only one on that list that i'd say wasn't great was Hitch (I didn't see Bad Boys though).

[Spazztasim]

Bad Boys was not good. (I watched both oddly enough). And Hancock? Really?

Costner-lover speaks the truth.

[diethx]

Bad Boys was not good. (I watched both oddly enough). And Hancock? Really?

Costner-lover speaks the truth.

I liked Hancock, and I liked him in it. I would've been much happier had the storyline not taken the turn it did in the middle of the movie (and stayed a super hero flick), but I still liked it.

[Spazztasim]

I was preoccupied with my date during MIB II, so I can't say for sure. But it also did not seem to pass muster.

[Spazztasim]

He gets eight figures to act. I don't.

I guess a more precise complain about Will Smith is not that he is a bad actor, just that he is overrated. Like you said about Hancock -- the shift in the middle was, eh, awkward. That "eh" quality seems to be more of the rule than the exception.

[Beguiler]

Hotel Coral Essex

[SolitareConfinement]

What movie was this?


the movie we were discussing was The Happening

[Stunseed]

No cock pump. ( Van Wilder )
I can't act. ( Daredevil )
Worst plot ever. ( Elektra )
Eric Bana sucked. ( Hulk )
Ed Norton pwned. ( Hulk )

[Clove]

Mars Mission... Fail
Moon Mission... Fail
Sun Mission... Fail
Saturn Mission... Fail
Jupitor Mission... Fail

Groundhog's Day... again.
Say "what?" again.
Cashier jobs suck.
Ferris isn't sick.
Arnold is dreaming.
Nash is nuts.
Kevin Spacey dies.
Meg Ryan dies.
Bruce Willis dies.
The Joker dies.
Anthony Hopkins dies.
Russell Crowe dies.
Angelina Jolie dies.
Donnie Darko dies.
Jesus Christ dies.
John Cussack kills.
Uma Thurman kills.
Arnold Scwarzenegger kills.
Renee Zellweger kills.
James Bond kills.
Magician kills (alot).

[Miscast]

Fuck off nature.. (The Happening)

[Jayvn]

I'm your huckleberry

[Ignot]

Evil alien clowns.

[NocturnalRob]

leo pwns arabs

[Izzy]

Bad Boys was not good. (I watched both oddly enough). And Hancock? Really?

Costner-lover speaks the truth.

Bad Boys II is one of my favorite movies ever. Hilarity + Action ftw.

"'ho's in my 'ouse?!"

"The devil, who's askin'?"

"De Devil is not welcome heeea!"

...Ok, so it doesn't look good in writing, but it's awesome anyway.

Oh, and "you one big tall Ludicrous looking motha-fucka, aintcha?"

[Allereli]

Ahnold is back

[Victor Mancini]

Bloated Kurtz dies.

[Methais]

The credits roll.

[Killer Kitten]

Pitt in Loincloth

Hot Men Running

Another Bug Hunt

[Killer Kitten]

Fastest Zombies Ever!

[Clove]

Fastest Zombies Ever!I expected this post to be: Johnny Depp Sucks!

[MotleyCrew]

Dufresne is innocent.

Before we die.

Life is chocolates.

[CrystalTears]

Future race dominates.

[Euler]

Nerds beat Jocks!

[Clove]

Damn dirty apes! (I don't care if someone else beat me to it NR).

[NocturnalRob]

i didn't say anything!!

dick

[Allereli]

Someone robs Pee-wee

Pfeiffer wears leather

[CrystalTears]

Go speed racer.

[Killer Kitten]

I expected this post to be: Johnny Depp Sucks!

The Pirate movies have afforded him a bit of redemption. But I feel safe with this one:

Depp Usually Sucks

[Incurable]

Doogie gets wasted

Boy Likes Pie

Dude Kisses Dude

Buddy Jesus Rocks

Spies get married

Father kills Slavers

Robot Finds Love

Bombers Jihad eachother

Theron Kills everyone

Bullets should curve

[Beguiler]

Agile Kimberly Flips

[CrystalTears]

Even trees walked.

[iJin]

365 wasn't enough.

[Back]

W is funny.

[Androidpk]

Oh noe rabies!