Sexual Terms & Definitions

[Wezas]

A friend just sent me this link. I knew most of the ones on the page, though there were some that are totally disgusting and some I've never heard of.

There are not pictures, just text definitions. Not for the timid. I've warned you.

http://www.plinkomedia.com/showarticle?articleID=321

Among the most amusing:

White Dragon (hahaha)
Tea with biscuits (ick)
Screaming Seagull (ouch)
Rodeo Clown (just plain wrong)

[peam]

Tame.

Here's the good dirt:
http://unix.rulez.org/~calver/funny/sex.html

EDIT - Text is definately NSFW. No images, though.

[Edited on 1-22-2004 by peam]

[Miss X]

omg Peam, my innocence is now tainted!

[CrystalTears]

Originally posted by Miss X
omg Peam, my innocence is now tainted!

You had innocence?! ::runs away::

Originally posted by Miss X
omg Peam, my innocence is now tainted!
um dont hate me for this ok but I gotta do it... Please forgive me!

Didnt Strayrogue take care of that?

Im so sorry you know I did not mean that, I just lack willpower... pity me do not hate me

[J-Tech]

This is the best shit i've read in yeras! Thanks for the entertainment peam.

-John

[Shalla]

Ugh god, I am not even half way through it and I couldn't take it anymore. It is far too graphic. and I have a very vivid imagination. If I go on, I don't think peanut butter, Hershey's, worms etc. will ever be the same again.. they will be forever tied down to nasty sex. You sick fucks.

[J-Tech]

The Electric Chair
Your psychobitch girlfriend decides she wants to try something kinky, so she props your stupid naive ass up in a chair, strips you down, and ties you up. After arousing you, she then takes a car battery and clamps two jumper cables to each nut sack. This causes you to have all sorts of synapses, spasms, and convulsions. She then mounts your Frankenstein and proceeds to get electrofucked. Warning! May cause erectile dysfunction after performed.

[Mint]

I am SO grossed out right now :barf:

[peam]

Hey, nothing wrong with the ol' Bait and Tackle on a cold, lonely night.

[Shalla]

Originally posted by peam
Hey, nothing wrong with the ol' Bait and Tackle on a cold, lonely night.

Your protein load will keep them nicely fed? Hon, that's nasty. worms using your sperm for sustenance. :flamed:

[J-Tech]

I dont understand why people are getting grossed out...i just read it and i find it funny, i dont really find any of it gross, i mean theres some fucked up shit, but its just TEXT...

-John

[Shalla]

Like I said. I have a vivid imagination.

[Mint]

Originally posted by Lady Shalla
Like I said. I have a vivid imagination.

Exactly.

[Miss X]

Originally posted by The Edine

Originally posted by Miss X
omg Peam, my innocence is now tainted!
um dont hate me for this ok but I gotta do it... Please forgive me!

Didnt Strayrogue take care of that?

Im so sorry you know I did not mean that, I just lack willpower... pity me do not hate me

DIE.

[StrayRogue]

My fave terms are:
Wolf-bagging
The Kyoto suprise
Cleaveland Steamer
And a jam doughnut.

Originally posted by Miss X


um dont hate me for this ok but I gotta do it... Please forgive me!

Didnt Strayrogue take care of that?

Im so sorry you know I did not mean that, I just lack willpower... pity me do not hate me

DIE.
ok and i love you too.

[Caramia]

And for those who want more...

http://www.starma.com/penis/muffy/muffy.html

Not a porn site, no pictures, just more euphemisms.

[Souzy]

OK, I only read it to "B". How is the word "Asian" any way shape or form, considered a pornographic term? Plus, I didn't see the word "Blumpkin" in there. So the dictionary is out dated, heh. :P

[Mint]

Originally posted by Lalana
OK, I only read it to "B". How is the word "Asian" any way shape or form, considered a pornographic term? Plus, I didn't see the word "Blumpkin" in there. So the dictionary is out dated, heh. :P

Okay, I'll bite Lalana...what is 'Blumpkin'? If it involves fecal matter dont reply please :barf:

[Souzy]

Originally posted by Mint
[quote]
Okay, I'll bite Lalana...what is 'Blumpkin'? If it involves fecal matter dont reply please :barf:

Then you don't wanna know hon. I gagged when I found out. :barf:

[peam]

You're probably confusing a "blumpkin" with a "blumpy."

[Souzy]

Originally posted by peam
You're probably confusing a "blumpkin" with a "blumpy."

I don't know these things peam. I just go by the terms these people tell me. So I was told "blumpkin". But, "blumpy" is the real term I take it? Either way, it's sick. :thumbsdown:

[Wezas]

I've heard blumpkin described in two different ways, so I'm not sure if there are two different terms or just someone confused. How should I say this... the first time I heard it, the woman would be seated. The second time, the guy would be seated. I think for both parties, #1 would be the option of choice.

[longshot]

The don't have the Houdini!!

When doing it doggy style, you pull out and spit on the girls back pretending to cum.

When she turns around, you unload on the unsuspecting girl's face.

They don't have the mushroom stamp either... It's when you bang your cock on the girl's forehead and it leaves a mushroom imprint (or bruise for you violent folks).

And a blunkin is a blumpy... it's when you get head while taking a shit.

Update!!

[Shalla]

Ahahah that's mean! WTF? update? bwahaha.. You actually did research on this? :lol:

Hahahaha, when i saw the title to this thread and i was hoping no one mentioned the White dragon. but alas it was mentioned in the first post. Theres one out there that is ALOT better and more comprehensive. It was going around the barracks. I'll have to find out later.

Just read the definition from the page and it doesn't give the white dragon justice. The white dragon is when you jizz in a girls mouth and quickly cover it up so she can't spit it out, then whisper in her ear "I've got syphalys (sp) so it comes out of her nose. (or dude\his nose in the case of snapp ::stare::)

[Mint]

God, I think I am changing my sexual preference to lesbian.

[Bobmuhthol]

Me too.

wont make a diffrence bob you still cant get laid.

[The Cat In The Hat]

Asian - A person of Chinese, Korean, Thai, Vietnamese, Japanese, or similar background.

Asian is a pornographic term now? heehee

Wezas thats just sick

Cat

[Nakiro]

Where's The Rusty Trombone?

Nakiro

elaborate.
they do not have the shocker either

[Nakiro]

Rusty Trombone - A sexual act in which a man squats atop the face of a partner (generally female) while the partner uses oral stimulation on the male's anus while giving a handjob at the same time.

[The Cat In The Hat]

OMG!

Thats all Ill say...

Cat

The Shocker
The act of inserting 2 fingers into the vaginal opening (normally the index and middle fingers), and 1 into the anus (normally the "pinky" finger). This is usually performed when she is laying back, in the "deep thrust" postion Commonly described a numerous number of ways, e. g. 2 in the pink, 1 in the stink; two in the grass one in the ass; two in the slut one in the butt; two in the koot, one in the boot; goin to town with one in the brown; and many more, this method of sexual gratification is one sought out by people of all levels. But only grand masters, like the Big Johnson have perfected it.

[Edited on 1-24-2004 by The Edine]

[Souzy]

Originally posted by The Cat In The Hat
Asian - A person of Chinese, Korean, Thai, Vietnamese, Japanese, or similar background.

Asian is a pornographic term now? heehee

Cat

That's what I'm saying!!!! :flamed:

Damn, longshot has his porn terms down pat. :P

[CrystalTears]

Please be careful with the way this thread is going. I don't have a problem with talking about sex, but it's getting a touch too detailed and graphic. Let's not get too carried away. Thanks. ;)

[Jolena]

I'm simply amazed, although I know I should not be, that so many of you know the terms and definitions by heart. Scary stuff lol

[The Cat In The Hat]

No kidding! U2U me your phone numbers! ROFLMAO

Cat


*Edited to make sure you KNOW thats a joke.

[Edited on 1-25-2004 by The Cat In The Hat]

[Stunseed]

I didn't see a Fisheye or Shrimpin in that list, either. What a shame.

[ThisOtherKingdom]

Let's not forget Santorum. The frothy mix of fecal matter and cum that is usually the byproduct of anal sex.

[peam]

Since The Shocker's all the rage now, I figured this link is appropriate for the thread:

http://www.bigshocker.com/

Thank you for that Peam.
I was awestruck that it was not on the sites

[Edited on 1-25-2004 by The Edine]