Observations on life

[Mularos]

I was in an okay mood when i decided to write up this little piece, but now that I finally have time today to write it, I've just probably had one of the worst days I have had in years. So forgive me if i go ranting too much.

I have made some observations about life that some of you already know, haven't had a problem with, or just haven't faced yet. I will start out saying that I am 23, a straight male, 167 and 66kg (5'6 and 146). No I don't have a 6-pack, but I'm not flabby, either. I am a decent looking guy (no recent pics, though. At least not that I’m in possession of.

For some reason, I can’t get hardly any girls to even look at me. It’s frustrating. Seriously. I have a few female friends, but that’s it. I’ve been single for over 2 years. I’ve tried everything I can think of. Shy, Nice, and even just being an asshole. I’m getting better at that. Tried different styles of dress and hair. Nothing works.

Now, after having said that I am straight, I did an experiment. A friend gave me the idea for it. One day he told a group of tourists that I was gay. Every night that I do that, I get 2 or 3 guys hanging around me all night. I truly don’t understand it. I know that guys mentality make them easier than girls, but damn. WTFO.

It seems that even ugly and heavy girls find it easy to get laid as much as they want. Seriously, the thing I hear that most pisses me off is when I overhear a girl say something like “OMG I haven’t had sex in two weeks”.

In addition, why, when I seem to have a good time for a few days, something always comes and screws it up completely? Snowball effect just rolls, starts as a flake and ends up the size of sacremento.

Seriously, who up there did I piss off so badly, and what did I do to invoke their anger?

/rant

[Keller]

If you need help with coping skills, talk to Backlash.

[thefarmer]

You sound like you have no confidence... which (most) girls require in a male.

[Itachi]

Ya get some game. You arent helping your cause by sitting at home crying and writing blogs.

[DeV]

As a short guy you've really got to improve your inner attitude because that's one of the main attributes that will set you apart from other guys. As someone else mentioned, most women require their guy be confident. Not overly so, but definitely enough to where project an image to women where you are not seeking their approval, nor caring what they think of you, even though you do to some extent. What's your fashion style? You should be wearing clothes that make you look slender and appear taller and are fashionable all at once. If you aren't packing a lot in the muscle department, hit the gym. That's gonna make for a huge boost. Not only will it improve your physical appearance, it will greatly increase your confidence level and your inner attitude will adjust to that. And most importantly, women WILL notice. Most women are attracted to dominant guys, so without being a total jerk, you need to figure out a way to balance the niceness with the badassness.

If all else fails you might want to consider lowering your expectations. That might get you laid a couple times, but if you're looking for a girlfriend, you've got to put in the effort to get what you want.

[Trouble]

Read The Game. It's a fun read about this average guy who learns to be a player and then becomes a player trainer. It's got some good info on what girls are actually attracted to as opposed to what they think they are attracted to. Some of it is BS but there is some decent info in there. And like I said, it's a fun read (up until the later chapters).

My friend runs a 'nice guy' image/dating consultation service out in LA. I don't have the URL here at work but I can send it to you later if you're interested. Supposedly they're opening up branches in other cities but I haven't talked to her in a few months so I don't know the status.

[Tisket]

No I don't have a 6-pack, but I'm not flabby, either.

That's your problem. Work on that.

Also, try asking for a date without the knife.

[Sean]

Get a sense of humor.

[thefarmer]

Read The Game. It's a fun read about this average guy who learns to be a player and then becomes a player trainer. It's got some good info on what girls are actually attracted to as opposed to what they think they are attracted to. Some of it is BS but there is some decent info in there. And like I said, it's a fun read (up until the later chapters).

My friend runs a 'nice guy' image/dating consultation service out in LA. I don't have the URL here at work but I can send it to you later if you're interested. Supposedly they're opening up branches in other cities but I haven't talked to her in a few months so I don't know the status.

:rofl: @ using The Game as advice.

[Skeeter]

Lower your standards, raise your percentages.

[Mularos]

As a short guy you've really got to improve your inner attitude because that's one of the main attributes that will set you apart from other guys. As someone else mentioned, most women require their guy be confident. Not overly so, but definitely enough to where project an image to women where you are not seeking their approval, nor caring what they think of you, even though you do to some extent. What's your fashion style? You should be wearing clothes that make you look slender and appear taller and are fashionable all at once. If you aren't packing a lot in the muscle department, hit the gym. That's gonna make for a huge boost. Not only will it improve your physical appearance, it will greatly increase your confidence level and your inner attitude will adjust to that. And most importantly, women WILL notice. Most women are attracted to dominant guys, so without being a total jerk, you need to figure out a way to balance the niceness with the badassness.

If all else fails you might want to consider lowering your expectations. That might get you laid a couple times, but if you're looking for a girlfriend, you've got to put in the effort to get what you want.

Gym is good advice, though I'm usually the swimming/free-diving type. That slimmed me down a lot, but didn't do much for the tone.

Fashion style doesn't make me look taller, but looks good and makes me look more slender. I am a small guy, In american sizes I usually wear a small, here it's a medium slim cut. I can probably get away with a Hollister small shirt.


Ya get some game. You arent helping your cause by sitting at home crying and writing blogs.

I never stay at home. I'm out most of the time. Happen to be at work at the moment.


Get a sense of humor.

Got that one already.

[AnticorRifling]

I'm not sure if this helps or not but I just got out of the bathroom here at work and I think, by law, I'm required to name whatever it was I just evacuated.

[Mularos]

Oh, and the standards wewn't all that high in the first place.

[AnticorRifling]

Oh, and the standards wewn't all that high in the first place.

Keep your standards high. If you settle you'll regret it, being alone and miserable is better than being miserable with a troll.

[Itachi]

well then just trade in your whiny brain for a witty one, research some back handed compliments and apply it. its women, not a tough cookie to crack.

[Gan]

Keep your standards high. If you settle you'll regret it, being alone and miserable is better than being miserable with a troll.

Thats because you let the troll see the break of day from your place.

Kick that shit to the curb while its still dark, troll problem solved.

[DeV]

Gym is good advice, though I'm usually the swimming/free-diving type. That slimmed me down a lot, but didn't do much for the tone. You may want to just focus on certain areas such as your arms and shoulders, which will help add height to your frame and give you a more muscular look in shirts.


Fashion style doesn't make me look taller, but looks good and makes me look more slender. I am a small guy, In american sizes I usually wear a small, here it's a medium slim cut. I can probably get away with a Hollister small shirt.Shirts with vertical stripes work quite well in that regard. Avoid baggy pants, which you probably already do. Accentuate your swimmers build and add a little more tone to it by adding to your workout. Short haircuts look best on short guys... another thing to keep in mind.

I'm done now. :)

[CrystalTears]

Geez, rough crowd.

Do you have any female friends? Do you work with any females? Do you go out with people from work? Where do you go to hang out?

There are so many variables that you're leaving out other than that gay guys are attracted to you to find out for sure what the problem is.

Do you even have contact with women on a regular basis? Maybe hang out with them, slowly see if they have any single friends.

[Celephais]

Do you even have contact with women on a regular basis? Maybe hang out with them, slowly see if they have any single friends.
Yeah, hang out w/ chick friends who you don't have a real chance with (sometimes this develops into a chance), and scope out their friends, find the hottest one, as was said earlier, DO NOT SETTLE (it's okay to get laid once and a while by settling, but don't let it get in the way of anything good).

[Mularos]

Geez, rough crowd.

Do you have any female friends? Do you work with any females? Do you go out with people from work? Where do you go to hang out?

There are so many variables that you're leaving out other than that gay guys are attracted to you to find out for sure what the problem is.

Do you even have contact with women on a regular basis? Maybe hang out with them, slowly see if they have any single friends.


Yes, I have several female friends, and I hang out with at least 1 or 2 of them most every night. One said she was going to try and hook me up, but no joy from that one yet.

No, I don't go out with people from work, I see them enough at work that I don't want to see them after. Like I said, I go out most every night. Work people like to bring work to the party.

[AnticorRifling]

Where are you "going out" to? Finding a good woman is like finding a good house; location, location, location.

[CrystalTears]

Where do you go every night that you keep emphasizing this point yet don't meet enough women to even date? Color me confused.

[Mularos]

Clubs, beach bars, this is a big tourist area, so most of the people I meet are gone in a week. There are 3 places that I regularly hit up.

[AnticorRifling]

Clubs, beach bars, this is a big tourist area, so most of the people I meet are gone in a week. There are 3 places that I regularly hit up.

So quit looking for the quick score and try to find some locals that will be around longer than a vacation.

[CrystalTears]

Clubs, beach bars, this is a big tourist area, so most of the people I meet are gone in a week. There are 3 places that I regularly hit up.
Well no shit you're not meeting anyone to date. They're fucking tourists. Don't you have any local places where regulars go that, you know, fucking live there??

You need to go somewhere else. You go to three places and they haven't been working out for you. Time to move on and find another place to hang out.

No offense, but with the physical attributes you've been telling us, you don't fit into a beach bar. I'm just saying. This could be the problem.

[Sean]

Originally Posted by Anticor
Where are you "going out" to? Finding a good woman is like finding a good house; location, location, location.

Officer Slater: "Yeah, I met the missus at piantball. Yeah, I shot her in the neck. And we just-- And we just hit it off, you know."

Officer Slater: "My first wife, who is a whore, by the way, where do you think I met her? A bar."
Officer Michaels: "It was this bar."
Officer Slater: "It was this bar."
Officer Slater: "I bought her a Binion's, complimented her on her tote bag and next thing I know, she's putting her mouth on the tip of my penis."

[Clove]

Buy yourself a wedding ring and take a college class. When bouncey coeds (invariably) ask about your wife, say "I'm a widower." Instant pussy.

[CrystalTears]

Buy yourself a wedding ring and take a college class. When bouncey coeds (invariably) ask about your wife, say "I'm a widower." Instant pussy.
Holy cow. WINNER!

[AnticorRifling]

Buy yourself a wedding ring and take a college class. When bouncey coeds (invariably) ask about your wife, say "I'm a widower." Instant pussy.


I love you...in the pants.

[Clove]

Hate the game, not the player.

[AnticorRifling]

Officer Slater: "Yeah, I met the missus at piantball. Yeah, I shot her in the neck. And we just-- And we just hit it off, you know."

Officer Slater: "My first wife, who is a whore, by the way, where do you think I met her? A bar."
Officer Michaels: "It was this bar."
Officer Slater: "It was this bar."
Officer Slater: "I bought her a Binion's, complimented her on her tote bag and next thing I know, she's putting her mouth on the tip of my penis."

And when is Superbad wrong? Never that's when.

[Mularos]

I do go to a few local spots, too. Locals seem even more stuck up than the tourists. At least before the season gets into full swing. The guy/girl ratio gets real messed up in the off season. But the people I regularly hang out with ARE locals, and I do go to local places. But that's maybe two times a week.

[CrystalTears]

Move

[Clove]

I do go to a few local spots, too. Locals seem even more stuck up than the tourists. At least before the season gets into full swing. The guy/girl ratio gets real messed up in the off season. But the people I regularly hang out with ARE locals, and I do go to local places. But that's maybe two times a week.Look man, I already told you what you need to do. Play=Beach Bar+Hot Bod+Convertible+Platinum Visa+Big Balls. You are not in that hunting ground's league. Go with the wedding ring. Srsly.

[Sean]

Or there's always the Sean2 special... a nice roofiecolada

[Clove]

Or there's always the Sean2 special... a nice roofiecoladaActually I think he just has his cat trip them now and does them while they're still passed out.

[Gan]

LOL Sean2 sleep assault!

[MotleyCrew]

Just from what you wrote, obviously I don't know you, and considering first impressions are usually based on the cover and not the book...

Speaking as a woman, I would have to say your height would be number one strike against you. How to over come that? More confidence without coming off as an asshat? Focus on petite women?


And Clove....:rofl: Sad thing is, hes probably right, it would probably work...

[Gan]

Yea.

Clove wins.

[Sean]

Originally Posted by Clove
Actually I think he just has his cat trip them now and does them while they're still passed out.

Only if he's trying to lobotomize them...

On a serious note have you tried the surrounding towns or cities? I know when I got tired of seeing the same old people around my town and not getting anywhere I started going out to different towns/places while remaining still generally local.

[Clove]

Only if he's trying to lobotomize them...

On a serious note have you tried the surrounding towns or cities? I know when I got tired of seeing the same old people around my town and not getting anywhere I started going out to different towns/places while remaining still generally local.I was being serious. Wedding ring=Catnip.

And Sean, you were a special case; the restraining orders pretty much blanketed your entire town. You had no choice but to expand your territory.

[g++]

Actually I think Sean makes a good point. Another thing is maybe your friends suck. I mean not like they arent good people but maybe they arent good enablers for meeting new people. I have a few different sets of friends, from high school, college, bars, locals etc. My friends from high school = no chicks ever in fact no new people period we just end up drunk. My friends from college and locals = meet new girls. Having a good wing man can help a guy out immensley. If your going out with people that talk about futurama and do shots all night your prolly not gonna meet anyone new.

[Clove]

Well obviously decent friends will help. So will getting out of the beach bars, but nothing attracts the ladies better than a wedding ring, except maybe some crutches and a dog (ask Dahmer).

[Clove]

Don't believe me? Check out the infidelity statistics:


Recent studies reveal that 45-55% of married women and 50-60% of married men engage in extramarital sex at some time or another during their relationship (Atwood & Schwartz, 2002 - Journal of Couple & Relationship Therapy) Being "married" gives you a 50/50 shot. Srsly.

[Sean]

Originally Posted by Clove
Don't believe me? Check out the infidelity statistics:


Quote:
Recent studies reveal that 45-55% of married women and 50-60% of married men engage in extramarital sex at some time or another during their relationship (Atwood & Schwartz, 2002 - Journal of Couple & Relationship Therapy)
Being "married" gives you a 50/50 shot. Srsly.

Okayyy

[Mighty Nikkisaurus]

It sounds like a combination of things. For one thing, your attitude is a huge thing. A lot of guys lament the fact that women seem to always go for the "assholes". It's not because women like being treated like shit, it's because women would rather spend time with someone who has some self-confidence and doesn't need coddling. More than anything else, a guy with a shit self-esteem is a turn off. Pair that with the fact that you're short, and you're pretty much repelling women. I tend to not feel attracted to short men, and it's not got anything to do with the height, it has to do with the attitude.

For a second thing, stop going to a bar. Seriously. Meet women at LOCAL places, not tourist areas where they're just getting trashed. I mean, do you seriously want your first time having sex after this hiatus to be drunken sex with someone you hardly know? If you're not getting laid often at least make sure it'll count. If you can't work up the nerve to talk to a girl when you're not under the influence, then you need to work on that, but going to a bar is not going to help. And by local places, I mean local places that girls hang out at.

Three, make sure your friends aren't total douche cougars because they will seriously inhibit your efforts. If they are, get new friends. Preferably friends who know girls, who are good at playing wingmen, and may be able to introduce you to new places/hang outs. And make sure you're assertive but not creepy when a girl does show interest. Most women aren't into chasing after a dude playing hard to get.

[Sean]

Nail some cougars..

[g++]

For a second thing, stop going to a bar. Seriously. Meet women at LOCAL places, not tourist areas where they're just getting trashed. I mean, do you seriously want your first time having sex after this hiatus to be drunken sex with someone you hardly know? If you're not getting laid often at least make sure it'll count. If you can't work up the nerve to talk to a girl when you're not under the influence, then you need to work on that, but going to a bar is not going to help. And by local places, I mean local places that girls hang out at. >>

Admit it if some douche walked up to you in the mall and asked what you were doing you would just tell him to fuck off.

If your going to leave the bar at least have a plan like volunteering for a soup kitchen or joining a kick ball league or something. Wandering around your local library hitting on people is going to get you arrested.

[Clove]

Nail some cougars..And some hood rats.

[Clove]

If you can't work up the nerve to talk to a girl when you're not under the influence, then you need to work on that, but going to a bar is not going to help. And by local places, I mean local places that girls hang out at.Hey, Nar... what are you doing later?

[Sean]

Originally Posted by Clove
And some hood rats.

Are you trying to say he's putting the pussy on a pedestal?

[Mighty Nikkisaurus]

For a second thing, stop going to a bar. Seriously. Meet women at LOCAL places, not tourist areas where they're just getting trashed. I mean, do you seriously want your first time having sex after this hiatus to be drunken sex with someone you hardly know? If you're not getting laid often at least make sure it'll count. If you can't work up the nerve to talk to a girl when you're not under the influence, then you need to work on that, but going to a bar is not going to help. And by local places, I mean local places that girls hang out at. >>

Admit it if some douche walked up to you in the mall and asked what you were doing you would just tell him to fuck off.

If your going to leave the bar at least have a plan like volunteering for a soup kitchen or joining a kick ball league or something. Wandering around your local library hitting on people is going to get you arrested.

That's not true at all-- it's how you approach someone. You don't have to be sitting at a bar to strike up a conversation with someone and hit it off. If a guy is in a bar, or at the grocery store, or at the mall, or at the park and makes a creepy comment to me, I'm going to tell him "Fuck off" regardless of the setting. Tons of people meet their significant others in places BESIDES bars, it's not that uncommon and to me at least, there's more sincerity in the interest. I'm not sure why you'd think a woman would be against getting hit on if it was any place besides a bar.

[Clove]

Are you trying to say he's putting the pussy on a pedestal?He's definitely putting the pussy on a pedestal. He needs to get out there and hit some hood rats first.

[Mighty Nikkisaurus]

Hey, Nar... what are you doing later?

I dunno yet, are you married?

[Clove]

I dunno yet, are you married?I have a wedding ring (help me demonstrate).

[Nieninque]

I mean, do you seriously want your first time having sex after this hiatus to be drunken sex with someone you hardly know?

I'm getting the idea that he's not that picky.

[Mighty Nikkisaurus]

I have a wedding ring (help me demonstrate).

Well I'd hang out with you but I'm sure you have plans with your wife.

[g++]

That's not true at all-- it's how you approach someone. You don't have to be sitting at a bar to strike up a conversation with someone and hit it off. If a guy is in a bar, or at the grocery store, or at the mall, or at the park and makes a creepy comment to me, I'm going to tell him "Fuck off" regardless of the setting. Tons of people meet their significant others in places BESIDES bars, it's not that uncommon and to me at least, there's more sincerity in the interest. I'm not sure why you'd think a woman would be against getting hit on if it was any place besides a bar.

Sure people meet in places other than bars. Usually like in a shared event of some sort. I dont have the balls to wander up to random people in public and strike up conversation though. A few reasons.

1. Her Boyfriend is right behind you.
2. Shes 15.
3. Before you even begin talking she hands you change
4. People are just going to be suspicious right off the bat.
5. They think your selling something.

I agree that bars are not the best places to meet someone, although they can be, but the advice to just go wander around the park asking what a great day it is isnt going to work either. It might work if you like the guy approaching you or are showing some signs but the amount of effort a guy would have to exert to find the one in 20 people that doesnt fit the first 4 criterion by cold calling people would be horrifying. You have to actually get involved in something and pick your battles especially if your insecure. I would seriously get involved in some organized activities before I tried that. Kick ball or softball or something the girls there are playing cause they are looking for guys anyway so at least they arent all with someone.

[Sean]

Bars are a great place to meet someone if you're like myself or Sean2 and your goals in life include being a functioning alcoholic and looking for someone who shares/understands that interest.

[Skeeter]

With his size, maybe he should try the local Jr. High.

[Skeeter]

Bars are a great place to meet someone if you're like myself or Sean2 and your goals in life include being a functioning alcoholic and looking for someone who shares/understands that interest.

Worked 4 me!











































:cry:

[Sean]

Yea but I set my standards high .. higher than hairdresser who doesn't pay her credit card bills anyway.

[Martaigne]

Dude, if I could get laid when I was 19-20, ANYONE can get laid. Clove can attest to this. edit: Not as a participant, you perverts!

[Mighty Nikkisaurus]

Well, my point wasn't really to go to those places solely to meet people. It's just to add more to your "what I do" repertoire and be open to meeting people. But then I'm also a firm believer that with some people, the more they try the more they're just going to fail because it's going to come off as looking desperate. Plus, talking to someone random doesn't mean hitting on them right off the bat, just striking up a conversation. If it goes somewhere, great, if not well, who cares?

[Skeeter]

Yea but I set my standards high .. higher than hairdresser who doesn't pay her credit card bills anyway.

Your dream girl

http://i184.photobucket.com/albums/x42/stinkbait22/drunk_chick.jpg

[Sean]

Originally Posted by David Cross
So I'm seeing all of this at once and in a matter of second and thinking to myself why is he going so slow, whats that guy looking at, etc. And then I see that he's looking at this girl who is on the street next to me walking down the street and I see what he's doing. He's driving parallel to her and he's trying to pick her up. The guy in the trash truck. He's sitting there going "Hey mama, come on give me a smile baby. Come on pretty pretty, give me a smile. Turn that shit upside down for me. make our day baby come on." You know and I'm looking at this and thinking what? Like she's going to sit there and go ".....say... giggle...i like you" like that's going to happen. But, everybody has that 1 friend or friend of a friend who has that annoying gung-ho go for it attitude and is like "Hey man whatever, thats fine you know you can like live you life the way you want to live it, whatever stay indoors play your video games or read your books whatever but na man i mean I go for it see what i'm saying. I mean I make life happen and it's not going to happen by just like sitting around I go out there and I experiment I'm a facilitator you see what I'm saying I facilitate. You know I set a domino chain reaction wherever i go i lay out dominoes i lay out figurative dominoes in a figure eight pattern sometimes its an ankh sometimes its a mobius strip kinda thing but i hold the last domino and it comes back to me so I call it the domino effect effect you know thats what I'm saying i make things happen I go for it, whatever man, I'll ask 100 chicks maybe I'll get 99 nos and thats fine slide it on slide it on whatever but maybe that 100th chick likes to fuck on a pile of trash.. see what i'm sayin.. yea thats what i'm saying."
.

[Sean]

Your dream girl

http://i184.photobucket.com/albums/x42/stinkbait22/drunk_chick.jpg

Like you wouldn't hit that you in your old age.

[Latrinsorm]

Kick ball or softball or something the girls thereAlso, girls playing softball is HILARIOUS to watch.

edit: Just don't let them play in the infield. This also goes for fat accident-prone guys (sorry Xyelin).

[Clove]

Well I'd hang out with you but I'm sure you have plans with your wife.Yeah and sometimes they involve a chick :P

[diethx]

With his size, maybe he should try the local Jr. High.

LOL. Damn, he's not THAT short. I dated a couple of short guys (one 5'6" and one 5'7") in the past, and I had no problems at all with their height. I'm also 5'3" though, so yeah, aim for the petite girls and don't listen to these guys ripping on your shortness :P

[Stanley Burrell]

Your dream girl

http://i184.photobucket.com/albums/x42/stinkbait22/drunk_chick.jpg

Pepsi?

[Mighty Nikkisaurus]

Obviously, she didn't want to over-do it on the drinking.

[Warriorbird]

I know short guys that do pretty damn well for themselves. You just need to find somewhere that you're comfortable and where you fit into the tribe that the girls belong to. Then you need to find something that makes you stand out from everybody else.

If you're a total geek there's things like the SCA, anime cons, and LARP. (Netted me one ex wife, so maybe that's bad advice)

If not... find some interest that you have that girls share.

The type of women I meet at bars aren't usually the type of women I want to keep knowing (though they're most of what I meet when I'm in VA). Mind you... most of the women I spent time with down in Louisiana were people I tailgated or went dancing with (which isn't that much different than meeting at bars) but there's certain differences.

[Daniel]

Admit it if some douche walked up to you in the mall and asked what you were doing you would just tell him to fuck off.

If your going to leave the bar at least have a plan like volunteering for a soup kitchen or joining a kick ball league or something. Wandering around your local library hitting on people is going to get you arrested.

Yes. This quote fucking wins.

[thefarmer]

Buy a puppy.

Puppy + dogpark (+ wedding ring) = pussy

Trust me.

[Celephais]

Buy a puppy.

Puppy + dogpark (+ wedding ring) = pussy

Trust me.
Def.

Also... don't stress out about it

Desperation is a stinky stinky cologne.

[thefarmer]

To follow up my previous post..

My wife and I went to the dog park with our new puppy intow. Played around for a few minutes, and we sat down on one of the benches. Wife went to the corner store for about 15 minutes to get some drinks.

I had like 10 women (3 super hot, 4-5 ok, rest old women) stop to pet the puppy and comment on how cute he was. Had I been the suicidal type (meaning my wife would rip my nuts out), I could have had plenty of phone numbers.

Since I like my life (nuts), I just said thanks.

[longshot]

I was in an okay mood when i decided to write up this little piece, but now that I finally have time today to write it, I've just probably had one of the worst days I have had in years. So forgive me if i go ranting too much.

I have made some observations about life that some of you already know, haven't had a problem with, or just haven't faced yet. I will start out saying that I am 23, a straight male, 167 and 66kg (5'6 and 146). No I don't have a 6-pack, but I'm not flabby, either. I am a decent looking guy (no recent pics, though. At least not that I’m in possession of.

For some reason, I can’t get hardly any girls to even look at me. It’s frustrating. Seriously. I have a few female friends, but that’s it. I’ve been single for over 2 years. I’ve tried everything I can think of. Shy, Nice, and even just being an asshole. I’m getting better at that. Tried different styles of dress and hair. Nothing works.



There isn't anyone on these boards that's going to fix all your woes in a single post.

First off, don't do the wedding ring thing. I hope whoever said that was kidding...

This is important: Height doesn't have anything to do with it. I'm 5'9", and I think I was around 140 lbs. when I was 23. That made me skinnier than you. If you let it zap your confidence, then it matters.

If it bothers you that much, hit the gym and eat a lot to bulk up.

I have no idea how you talk to other people. Or women for that matter. So it's tough to give specific advice. Confidence matters more than anything. It affects everything you do. It's your posture. It's the volume of your voice. It's the pace of the words you say. It's the eye contact you make. It's your body language. It's everything that says, "My world is a good place to be. You're lucky to be a part of it."

That doesn't mean that you have to be an asshole. It just means that if you are a super nice guy that brings zero to the table, then a girl is to not going to have any respect for you.

I agree with the person that recommended reading "The Game." I do NOT think it's an advice book. Or a teaching manual. It's not something to be imitated, and I'm in no way advocating that you attempt to transform into a pickup artist, or a wanna be pickup artist, or any of that garbage. But, the book might give you a new perspective on what matters to the opposite sex. If you think of it as a self-help manual, then you're fucking up.

Women can smell desperation, so if you're constantly out trying for a quick kill, you're going to get shut down. Repeatedly.

It helps a lot to be creative. Make people laugh... and understand what's funny to them. It doesn't mean anything if it's only funny to you.

I don't know what to tell you... but you're doing something wrong. You're 23. You should be getting laid.

[War Drums]

12 STEP SOLUTION:

Step 1: Find like minded people like yourself.

Step 2: Pool your resources together and fly over to some unstable part of the world.

Step 3: Locate more like minded people like yourself.

Step 4: Train your followers with basic hand to hand combat and small arms. Acquire a competent officer corp.

Step 5: Take over a small city.

Step 6: Use funds to acquire a few tactical nuclear weapons.

Step 7: Take over a small country.

Step 8: Buy tanks,aircraft, and heavy artillery.

Step 9: Assure neighbors that you have no ill designs on them and are peaceful.

Step 10: Invade Poland.

Step 11: Make a tripatriate pact,sign a peace treaty with Russia.

Step 12: Invade France.

By this time, you should have had enough media coverage, political clout, and fear from your subjects that little girls in kansas will jack off to a 10 x 12 picture of you in their bathrooms. Follow this plan and you'll be getting all the pussy.

[longshot]

12 STEP SOLUTION:

Step 1: Find like minded people like yourself.

....

Step 12: Invade France.

By this time, you should have had enough media coverage, political clout, and fear from your subjects that little girls in kansas will jack off to your 10 x 12 picture of you in their bathrooms. Follow this plan and you'll be getting all the pussy.

Step 13: Stop posting inane shit on message boards.

You need help.

[thefarmer]

I agree with the person that recommended reading "The Game." I do NOT think it's an advice book. Or a teaching manual. It's not something to be imitated, and I'm in no way advocating that you attempt to transform into a pickup artist, or a wanna be pickup artist, or any of that garbage. But, the book might give you a new perspective on what matters to the opposite sex. If you think of it as a self-help manual, then you're fucking up.

The main point should take away from reading that book is that having confidence=getting laid.

[Sean of the Thread]

The problem is you're a midget. Join the circus or at last become a carny ffs. Things will get better.

[Snapp]

I have nothing new to add.. just echoing a couple points...

Being short is not the problem. (my bf is 5'6" :p)

Lack of confidence is.. don't be so down on yourself.

[Revalos]

As someone who also called on the Player's Corner "I suck at life" Helpline and found it ridiculously more valuable than expensive therapy, I came here to say that just about everything said, regardless of how much it seems to help now, is good reference material in the future.

I can't tell you how many times I go back and look at the threads about my divorce and remember what I was thinking back then and what I would have probably done if I hadn't come here first.

I'm now a normal single person, where I was going down the road of becoming a freakish hosebeast of a loser, committed to never having a real relationship ever again.

Let me echo the best comment I've seen on this so far: Confidence: get it.

It may sound like bullshit, but it is absolutely essential. How do you think that the idiot who wrote "The Secret" made so much money writing about it? I must have beat myself up for weeks before coming here, and then when I tried to go back out into the real world, I completely realized how being confident makes you attractive.

The first step is coming here and airing your issues, but the next step is getting the fuck out of here and not coming back for advice at every step of your development. Take the lessons learned here and apply them, don't come back and tell us how they worked/didn't work. That isn't a confident response.

As for an example of this, there is a 34 year old, balding, not terribly fit divorced father is currently about to get engaged to a hot 27 year old single party girl that I know at work, and she couldn't be happier. Every guy I know has scratched their heads trying to figure out how this guy did it. It is confidence. Plain and simple.

[Anferis]

Yeah the confidence works. I was wondering why girls would always bitch and moan about their boyfriends being jackasses but not go for the guy enduring said bitching and moaning and being nice about it. All I had to do was be the jackass and it works.

[Sean of the Thread]

I have nothing new to add.. just echoing a couple points...

Being short is not the problem. (my bf is 5'6" :p)

Lack of confidence is.. don't be so down on yourself.

How tall are you snapster?

[thefarmer]

It may sound like bullshit, but it is absolutely essential. How do you think that the idiot who wrote "The Secret" made so much money writing about it? I must have beat myself up for weeks before coming here, and then when I tried to go back out into the real world, I completely realized how being confident makes you attractive.

The woman didn't write the secret.

She cobbled together a bunch of (more popular/respected) new age/mystical folks's work on 'the law of attraction' and made a book/movie out of it. Everything in that book has been published before numerous times. She just happened to catch Oprah's eye with her snazzy video and the public gobbled up her trash.



My favorite part as to why that book (and her) is shit?

Paraphrased: "The best way to loose weight is to stay away from fat people. By ignoring the fat, you protect your aura. This always works with cancer. Stay away from it, totally ignore it, and it doesn't exist for you"

She also claimed to have cured cancer with her 'thoughts'.

[Gelston]

A good little secret.. Learn about body language. Its pretty simple. Everything from how they are sitting, or standing. Are their feet pointing at you? Good, are they pointing away? Bad.

Work on your own body language and how you should respond to the body language of others. Its simple things that won't be noticed outright, but makes a bit of a difference.

IF you are talking to a chick and she is constantly rolling her hair around her fingers... GET THE FUCK AWAY, she is nuts.

[Miscast]

Get a bitchin job and the rest will fall into place

[CrystalTears]

First off, don't do the wedding ring thing. I hope whoever said that was kidding...
We're just trying to get the guy laid, dude.

[Skeeter]

Def.

Also... don't stress out about it

Desperation is a stinky stinky cologne.

:love: supertroopers

[Sean]

Originally Posted by Skeeter
supertroopers

Which brings me to my next piece of advice, learn to chug syrup. Power is derived from the lips and women love power.. and mustache rides.

[Skeeter]

All joking aside, watching this show may help you.

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B000UQQKMQ/ref=pd_bbs_1?ie=UTF8&s=digital-video&qid=1211982601&sr=8-1

I watched a marathon one Sunday when football was over but Baseball hadn't started yet. It's cheesy as hell, but the guy really does give some good advice. I wouldn't recommend dressing like the douchebag host though.

[Sean]

Or he could just have a film crew follow him around...

[Skeeter]

solid point. I think it was mostly hidden camera in the clubs the more I think about it.

[BigWorm]

Almost 100 posts and no one has commented on how hilarious the poster name/title are? I need to make a V'Tull account and post a few blogs lamenting the horrors of war.

[Jayvn]

Get a sense of humor.

ya... jokes = sex for real...
seriously
and kids...
and child support...
you're not so bad off.

[Snapp]

How tall are you snapster?

6'3" Heh.

[thefarmer]

All joking aside, watching this show may help you.

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B000UQQKMQ/ref=pd_bbs_1?ie=UTF8&s=digital-video&qid=1211982601&sr=8-1

I watched a marathon one Sunday when football was over but Baseball hadn't started yet. It's cheesy as hell, but the guy really does give some good advice. I wouldn't recommend dressing like the douchebag host though.

That guy has his own book too. Considering he's one of the main guys in "The Game", I guess he figured it was time to make some cash off stupid schmucks needing to get laid too...

[longshot]

IF you are talking to a chick and she is constantly rolling her hair around her fingers... GET THE FUCK AWAY, she is nuts.

A girl that plays with her hair when talking to you are usually interested. I don't know where you got this from.

[Celephais]

:love: supertroopers
Thank christ someone got this.

Clearly Supertroopers has all the advice you'll need... CAN-D-BARS

[Tisket]

A girl that plays with her hair when talking to you are usually interested. I don't know where you got this from.

Hell yes. I constantly flipped my hair and played with it when I was dating anyone halfway interesting. I'm lucky I didn't end up bald.

[Arkans]

Get a sense of humor (a good one) and some fucking confidence, man.

Also, don't go looking with some intention. It makes you look like a fucking creep.

Take for instance me and my (un)stable girlfriend met in a strange circumstance. Her friend, me, my friend, and her other guy friend were going to a weekly event at a club.

Her female friend's mom decided to try to kill herself with sleeping pills.

What did I do at the hospital? Hung out with the girl I was taking, dropped some ecstasy, took off my pants outside the hospital, and acted like a buffoon.

I mean, it sounds creepy, but all it matters is how you come off and what type of person they are. This obviously wouldn't work for everyone.

- Arkans

[Daniel]

Yea. Please don't ever offer that as advice Arkans. I'd really like to be able to go to the hospital without having to deal with awkward people on acid with no pants.

[Arkans]

It's not meant to be advice. Frankly, it was a ridiculously stupid idea when I look back at it.

It's meant to point out that any situation can net you someone to be with. No reason to be on the hunt at the usual spots (bars, ect.)

Nine out of ten times the above will get you arrested.

- Arkans

PS: I had boxers on, just my pants where down

[CrystalTears]

A girl that plays with her hair when talking to you are usually interested. I don't know where you got this from.
If she's twirling a strand of hair with a glazed look in her eye, she's bored. If she flipping her hair around, she's flirting. There's a difference.

[Stanley Burrell]

LARP

This might be a good way of terminating a relationship, assuming the person you're dating thinks it a bit odd for you to leap on top of the table and demand Dwarven mead, as opposed to restaurant red wine.

I wonder if I could hire the Mafia to kill LARPers. Unchecked timebomb.

[CrystalTears]

Take for instance me and my (un)stable girlfriend met in a strange circumstance. Her friend, me, my friend, and her other guy friend were going to a weekly event at a club.

Her female friend's mom decided to try to kill herself with sleeping pills.

What did I do at the hospital? Hung out with the girl I was taking, dropped some ecstasy, took off my pants outside the hospital, and acted like a buffoon.
Please don't take dating advice from the Arkans drugged out family. Good lord.

[Arkans]

As stressful as some parts may be, 95% of my life is really good.

Your mileage may vary and I will stress CT's point as to not take advice, such as this, from me.

- Arkans

[Sweets]

Maybe you're focusing too much on finding someone when you go out. Desperation and feeling like your being circled by a shark is a BIG turn off. Perhaps by taking a deep breath, relaxing then just trying to enjoy yourself will attract the ladies (unless enjoying yourself includes dropping E and pulling your pants down, don't do this please). Nothing is sexier than a laid back, fun guy. Once you get the ball rolling, use that intensity in the bedroom. Rawr.

[Skeeter]

Why would you date a girl whose mother was trying to off herself? Talk about inviting unneeded drama and baggage into your life.

[Celephais]

Why would you date a girl whose mother was trying to off herself? Talk about inviting unneeded drama and baggage into your life.
Uh... because if her mother succeeds, that's one less person cockblocking you.

... man even I feel that was bad taste.

[TheEschaton]

Uh... because if her mother succeeds, that's one less person cockblocking you.

... man even I feel that was bad taste.

yeah, I'm quoting it to keep the bad taste feeling preserved. ;)

[Celephais]

yeah, I'm quoting it to keep the bad taste feeling preserved. ;)
But you didn't quote my quote! I was really responding to someone's question:
"Why would you date a girl whose mother was attempting to move out of state"

[TheEschaton]

imbedded quotes are well beyond me.

[Celephais]

I like cock.
Besides, who puts faith in a quote... :tumble:

[TheEschaton]

Incredible, I don't think I even used any of those words individually.

[Martaigne]

I like cock, it's incredible.

Fixed.

[Arkans]

Her friend's mother was trying to off herself, not her mother.

- Arkans

[ViridianAsp]

You sound like you have no confidence... which (most) girls require in a male.


Yes, we do require a set of balls. As being one of the ugly/fat girls, I waited like five years to find a serious relationship, but that's because it's hard to not find a douchebag at every turn.


Your problem sounds like you have super high expectations and standards, so yeah, maybe you need to take off the blinders, it's not about getting laid women like substance, you really haven't said much about your having substance just that you keep trying template after template of maleness on.

For the record, gay guys don't care if you have substance, they only care if you are a top or a bottom if they are looking to get laid.

[Daniel]

For the record, gay guys don't care if you have substance, they only care if you are a top or a bottom if they are looking to get laid.

This is not even remotely true.

The key point here is "if they are looking to get laid". If all you're good for is getting laid then that is all you will get.

[Latrinsorm]

I know I always play with my hair when I read Tisket's posts. :heart:
For the record, gay guys don't care if you have substance, they only care if you are a top or a bottom if they are looking to get laid.That probably could have been phrased better.

[Daniel]

I didn't even read the gay part.

My bad, I have no knowledge of such things.

[Latrinsorm]

I think what she meant was gay guys that specifically are looking to get laid don't care etc., not that gay guys in general don't care, and they only care about topness/bottomness (which as a guy who works with particle physicists is hilarious language) when they're looking to get laid.

Natural language needs parentheses, man.

[g++]

I think what she meant was gay guys that specifically are looking to get laid don't care etc., not that gay guys in general don't care, and they only care about topness/bottomness (which as a guy who works with particle physicists is hilarious language) when they're looking to get laid.

Natural language needs parentheses, man.

women are all about charms?

[BigWorm]

I think what she meant was gay guys that specifically are looking to get laid don't care etc., not that gay guys in general don't care, and they only care about topness/bottomness (which as a guy who works with particle physicists is hilarious language) when they're looking to get laid.

Natural language needs parentheses, man.

I'm totally a charm. Any know where I can get some strange?

[longshot]

If she's twirling a strand of hair with a glazed look in her eye, she's bored. If she flipping her hair around, she's flirting. There's a difference.

Good point. I forgot that some people might not be able to tell the difference... kind of sad.

I understand where Arkans is coming from. It's the "you never know what might come of this" mentality. You have to be "on" all the time, and can't just pick and choose when you want to try and be a rock star. Sure you can change your clothes and whatnot, but ultimately it's you (confidence, etc.) that determines the outcome. There are very few things you can control in life... I think the biggest one is how you react to a given situation.

I didn't take my pants off anywhere, but I have a story in the same line of thought. I went into Chipotle (fucking Chipotle!) and there was a cute girl smoking outside. She came in and got in line behind me. With a serious face, I said, "I'm thinking about taking up smoking. Can you recommend a brand for me to try out?"

This wasn't a canned line. It was spur of the moment, and I threw it out there to make her laugh. I planned on just grabbing carryout, but ended up sitting down with her, and then going out with her a few times.

I didn't go into a restaurant trying to meet a girl to fuck two dates later. I was just me, and everything ended up working out. If it didn't, who gives a shit? But, if you are constantly trying, that sort of thing will NEVER happen.

[Daniel]

The big thing is being comfortable more than anything. Every fucking girl I meet things I'm some sort of player because I am comfortable around girls (almost all my friends in DC are girls). You can't teach that shit. I never go up to girls and go "Hey..nice shoes..wanna have my penis in your mouth"? Yet. I still get mad play (You know..when I'm not in a relationship).

You just need to chill out and become comfortable with yourself. Focus on making yourself a better person and the confidence will come and then so will the pussy.

[Stretch]

Maybe you're looking in the wrong places.

It took me a long time to accept that I'm very much an introverted person, which usually makes me come off as cold or aloof. I was always trying to emulate my friends at bars / clubs / parties, which hardly ever worked for me.

I still hit up bars occasionally, but all I'm after now is just having a fun night hanging out with friends instead of trying to hook up. I'm a lot more comfortable dating people I already know, or through mutual friends, so that's what I go with.

You could also try dating websites if you haven't already. I know a few couples that have met through OkCupid.com

[thefarmer]

http://www.chatandmeet.com/images/dateclick.gif

Or there's always this...


http://bbwdatingsites.org/images/bbw_personals/bbw_personals_250x251.jpg

Or this...

http://www.sharewareplaza.com/images/screenshot/32206.gif


Or this...

http://flukenews.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/03/index_06.gif

[TheEschaton]

I never go up to girls and go "Hey..nice shoes..wanna have my penis in your mouth"?

Although, sadly, I do know some girls for whom the line "Wanna have my penis in your mouth?" would work. It's confident. It shows you have trust in your penis. Some girls like it.

Bitches be nothin but tricks and hos.

-TheE-

[AnticorRifling]

Although, sadly, I do know some girls for whom the line "Wanna have my penis in your mouth?" would work. It's confident. It shows you have trust in your penis. Some girls like it.

Bitches be nothin but tricks and hos.

-TheE-


I'm going to need a list, for research purposes only.

[Sean of the Thread]

I don't know how relevant this is but I've been jerking off to girls softball competitions on ESPN for a couple days.

Anyways on topic upload your picture here so we can break it down for you.

[Stanley Burrell]

Or this...

http://flukenews.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/03/index_06.gif

^ Only the most exceptional people become aware of mutton sex.

Those that learn it exists must possess a rare degree of intuition, sensitivity, and a questioning nature.

However, very rarely, some gain this wisdom through wholly different means. I am one of those few.

And if you think I just rephrased The Animatrix's "World Record" intro, you are very, very wrong, my friends.



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YAClGmkBWkQ

Seriously though, Farmer /threadclosed with that. It is of much win.