Shaken Kitten Syndrome

[Sean of the Thread]

A) Is there such a thing
B) Is it a criminal offense?
C) If B=Yes than please disregard this post.


P.s. does anyone know kitten cpr?

[NocturnalRob]

P.s. does anyone know kitten cpr?

pussy resuscitation?

ummm...is this a time-sensitive issue here? does someone need to call the ASPCA?

[Gan]

shaken kitten syndrome = broken neck

CPR would be a waste of time

And, yes its considered some form of animal abuse if it can be proven... so dont post any pics.

[Anebriated]

did someone steal your laptop?

[Ambrosia]

A) Is there such a thing
B) Is it a criminal offense?
C) If B=Yes than please disregard this post.


P.s. does anyone know kitten cpr?


A-Yes
B-Yes

and WTF were you shaking a kitten that bad for?

[Sean of the Thread]

Guys I'm kidding.

Lol he's just driving me nuts... he likes to climb up my leg and back and ambush my ear with a bite then dive onto the keyboard and dash off the desk... rinse repeat. All in about 3 seconds.

Besides I'd just throw him out into traffic to cover up the evidence right next to the heap of 20 some odd mangled squirrels. He'd blend right in.

Or toss him into the pile of 30 webkins laying all over my girls room... be like E.T.

[Tisket]

Doesn't he have small children? My guess is they were being a bit rough with their newest toy.

[Keller]

WTF were you shaking a kitten that bad for?

. . .


did someone steal your laptop?

[Tisket]

My guess was wrong.

[Ambrosia]

he likes to climb up my leg and back and ambush my ear with a bite then dive onto the keyboard and dash off the desk... rinse repeat. All in about 3 seconds.

Haha.. invest in a pet cage, or lock him in a bathroom/spare bedroom for a little while.

[Gan]

did someone steal your laptop?

Winner

[Sean of the Thread]

No he's really an awesome fucking little cat. Glad I got the runt of the litter again as he's a little prick. Growing fast as hell. His colors are coming in... his markings and colors resemble a tiger shark.

Fully litter box trained already and I think he's 9 weeks old by now.

[Gan]

Haha.. invest in a pet cage, or lock him in a bathroom/spare bedroom for a little while.

The best thing to do with playful kittens is the following:

1. Pingpong ball
2. Empty bathtub

Put kitten in tub (without water!) and throw in pingpong ball. For better results, close shower curtain.

I promise you its good for hours. Just take the ball away at night - or you'll hear it all night long.

[Keller]

The best thing to do with playful kittens is the following:

1. Pingpong ball
2. Empty bathtub

Put kitten in tub (without water!) and throw in pingpong ball. For better results, close shower curtain.

I promise you its good for hours. Just take the ball away at night - or you'll hear it all night long.

Awesome idea!

I will reserve that for when the old lady actually lets me get a pet that lives outside of water.

[Gan]

If I had a kitten I would video it and put it on Youtube. They go spastic. Close the curtain to prevent the ball from flying out and I promise you the action will speed up like 5x.

Its hillarious to watch.

Its gotta be a pingpong ball though - due to the light weight and bounce/sound factor.

[Misun]

The best thing to do with playful kittens is the following:

1. Pingpong ball
2. Empty bathtub

Put kitten in tub (without water!) and throw in pingpong ball. For better results, close shower curtain.

I promise you its good for hours. Just take the ball away at night - or you'll hear it all night long.


That makes me want to get a kitten now! But then it will become a cat and the fun will be over. :(

[Clove]

Milk ring.

[CrystalTears]

Maybe I should try that with my ferrets.

[Gan]

This activity lost its allure when my old cat crossed the 14 lb. threshold and was too big to go nutzo in the bathtub.

Now I just get that "you must be fucking crazy" look when I throw a pingpong ball at it.

[NocturnalRob]

Now I just get that "you must be fucking crazy" look when I throw a pingpong ball at it.

i get that same look from my girlfriend when i take my pants off

[Gan]

i get that same look from my girlfriend when i take my pants off
Wait until the girlfriend is upgraded to wife version 1.0. The system error message you get is even better.


On the bathtub kitten note... here's one with a golf wiffle ball - which doesnt have the response the pingpong ball has.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lqr_GoptnR4

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=atx1b4q4wq0

[Stanley Burrell]

Sell it for GemStone silver, foo'!

[Stanley Burrell]

Xyelin hopped out of a UPS truck and started spreading rumors about how gay I was in high school?

Anebriated wins though.

[NocturnalRob]

Wait until the girlfriend is upgraded to wife version 1.0.

i suppose then i'll have to get v2.0 (i.e., trophy wife). then they HAVE to...right? right?

i think i read that in penthouse forums somewhere...

[Gan]

i suppose then i'll have to get v2.0 (i.e., trophy wife). then they HAVE to...right? right?

i think i read that in penthouse forums somewhere...

http://ptrau.free.fr/wife-1-0.htm

[Clove]

Wait until the girlfriend is upgraded to wife version 1.0. The system error message you get is even better."It's not your birthday..."

[Keller]

i suppose then i'll have to get v2.0 (i.e., trophy wife). then they HAVE to...right? right?

i think i read that in penthouse forums somewhere...

This complete bitch at my school once told a group of us (we were discussing a friend's pending marriage proposal) that she wouldn't accept anything less than a one-karat diamond. She later amended that requirement to allow for an "upgrade" when her boyfriend was richer. I told her, "Any guy who understands and accepts those terms will upgrade you before he upgrades that diamond. That's a promise."

She still doesn't even acknoledge my presence and it's not 18 months later.

[Stanley Burrell]

Du mal à comprendre?

Yes.

The Internet wins.

[NocturnalRob]

She still doesn't even acknoledge my presence

you = winner in this scenario.

[Keller]

you = winner in this scenario.

Maybe. She's fucking super hot with extra large fun-bags. Needless to say, I'd hit it.

[Stanley Burrell]

This complete bitch at my school once told a group of us (we were discussing a friend's pending marriage proposal) that she wouldn't accept anything less than a one-karat diamond. She later amended that requirement to allow for an "upgrade" when her boyfriend was richer. I told her, "Any guy who understands and accepts those terms will upgrade you before he upgrades that diamond. That's a promise."

She still doesn't even acknoledge my presence and it's not 18 months later.

I'd give her a carrot. UPGRADE THIS. Bwahahahaha. Yes, my penis is an actual vegetable.

Karotenemia is a funny disease.

[Gan]

Yes.

The Internet wins.

lo que la cogida?

[NocturnalRob]

Maybe. She's fucking super hot with extra large fun-bags. Needless to say, I'd hit it.

let me rephrase. you = loser in this scenario.

then again, plenty of hot girls with massive tits that won't require a big diamond to let you do bad things to them. and, of course, that diamond will be 1 kt forever. the bitch will get older, uglier, and her boobs will become knee-knockers. lame.

[Gan]

Some call it the law of diminishing returns.

Her statement reminds me of the post in the longshot folder about the letters to craigs list looking for a husband... and the responses received.

[diethx]

That makes me want to get a kitten now! But then it will become a cat and the fun will be over. :(

Not all of them. My cat Emmy is almost 3 and Lily is almost 2. They both still go nuts over the laser pointer. And Lily goes nuts over EVERYTHING. She was one of those kittens who acted like a puppy, and then she became a full-grown cat who still acts like a puppy. It's mostly awesome.

[NocturnalRob]

And Lily goes nuts over EVERYTHING.

especially when she senses a soul she can steal.

cats FTL

[Misun]

Not all of them. My cat Emmy is almost 3 and Lily is almost 2. They both still go nuts over the laser pointer. And Lily goes nuts over EVERYTHING. She was one of those kittens who acted like a puppy, and then she became a full-grown cat who still acts like a puppy. It's mostly awesome.

Lucky.

[diethx]

especially when she senses a soul she can steal.

cats FTL

My fiance used to think like you. Until we got Lily. Now he loves his pooses. I swear, she's the funnest cat ever.

[CrystalTears]

My cat is about 13 years old and today I dropped the milk ring on the ground in front of her and within seconds she was playing with it all over the house. I love that cat.

[diethx]

Yeah, some cats get lazy as they age and don't want to play so much. Some other cats act like babies their whole lives. I've noticed though with my two, once you introduce one of the latter to one of the former, the lazy one wants to play much more often than they did before they got a playmate.

[NocturnalRob]

My fiance used to think like you. Until we got Lily. Now he loves his pooses. I swear, she's the funnest cat ever.

well, i'm also allergic, so it's not really by choice. one of my best friends got a kitten when he got married--Bitsy. very cute. very talkative. I can be in a room with her for about 1 minute before my eyes start to swell shut. good times.

[diethx]

well, i'm also allergic, so it's not really by choice. one of my best friends got a kitten when he got married--Bitsy. very cute. very talkative. I can be in a room with her for about 1 minute before my eyes start to swell shut. good times.

Ahh. That really sucks, because cats are awesome. :/

Talkative cats get old though. Lily is the same way... and it's super cute until i'm trying to go to sleep and she won't shut the fuck up.

[CrystalTears]

I'm allergic to pet dander. I don't care. She's worth taking the medication for.

[diethx]

I'm allergic to pet dander. I don't care. She's worth taking the medication for.

Kind of off topic, but I found out I was allergic to rabbits after our rabbit died in February and my allergies got like 100x better. I feel guilty sometimes for feeling relieved about it.

[Clove]

Kind of off topic, but I found out I was allergic to rabbits after our rabbit died in February and my allergies got like 100x better. I feel guilty sometimes for feeling relieved about it.OMFG THE RABBIT DIED. CONGRATS DIETHX!!!!!111!1!1!!11

[Keller]

OMFG THE RABBIT DIED. CONGRATS DIETHX!!!!!111!1!1!!11

Thems' good eats.

[diethx]

:( MEAN BASTARDS

[Keller]

:( MEAN BASTARDS


But seriously. Stewed rabbit is MMM MMMM good.

[Gan]

http://images.tribe.net/tribe/upload/photo/0db/6fa/0db6fa5b-5d98-4614-ae0a-70c6324ae80e.medium


Hasenpfeffer! Bring me my hasenpfeffer!

[Peanut Butter Jelly Time]

Guys I'm kidding.

Lol he's just driving me nuts... he likes to climb up my leg and back and ambush my ear with a bite then dive onto the keyboard and dash off the desk... rinse repeat. All in about 3 seconds.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=occw-8sSao4

[NocturnalRob]

http://images.tribe.net/tribe/upload/photo/0db/6fa/0db6fa5b-5d98-4614-ae0a-70c6324ae80e.medium


Hasenpfeffer! Bring me my hasenpfeffer!

hahahaha...props for the reference. love that stew

[BigWorm]

hahahaha...props for the reference. love that stew

Mmmm..... blood. Gotta love those Germans, using the blood to thicken things up.

Rabbit, like a lot of game, is a lot better if the meat is from a younger individual. When they get older, the meat gets a lot tougher, though typically a stew will soften the meat up. Rabbit's really all about how its cooked, which is harder than you might think because rabbit meat is so lean.

[BigWorm]

well, i'm also allergic, so it's not really by choice. one of my best friends got a kitten when he got married--Bitsy. very cute. very talkative. I can be in a room with her for about 1 minute before my eyes start to swell shut. good times.

I'm allergic as well. Most cats don't bother me until they rub on me and then I get wtfpwned, but some places as soon as I walk the door my eyes start burning like Emislity's axe wound.

[NocturnalRob]

burning like Emislity's axe wound.

i think a lot of that has to do with her allergy to penicillin, right?

[Sean of the Thread]

http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b236/Japgross/motivator242260.jpg

[Bobmuhthol]

<<Milk ring.>>

One of my cats fucking loves them.

<<that diamond will be 1 kt forever.>>

Diamonds are constantly decaying into normal carbon, just very, very slowly.

[Gan]

I'm allergic as well. Most cats don't bother me until they rub on me and then I get wtfpwned, but some places as soon as I walk the door my eyes start burning like Emislity's axe wound.

Damn you for invoking the [censored] rule.

Dont you know that everytime someone mention's her name that picture is bound to show up?


DONT SAY IT!!!

[Sean of the Thread]

I did cleverly give her the alias of the "ABU AXE WOUND" in her wanted poster too... thus his comment DEMANDED my motivational poster be posted.