When it was all so brilliant.

[Asha]

I only just got out of my Dads car after dropping off my girlfriend at her house, when he told me he was suffering from lung cancer before we walked inside to my mum and niece.
Just now I thought, ''shit that's it'' what the fuck am I going to do.
I always thought he must be having some problems and that it wasn't his diabetes.
It's typical that I was saying how well I am doing in my job that now he had to tell me. I know it's becouse he feels I'm gonna do alright and that.
I'm shitting myself. Till this minute I had thought he was going to live forever.
I have to get ready for the months that are coming.
If there's anything I can't do without, it's my Dad.
I've been sat here in the work room waiting for him to tell mum, and I've watched him and realised he's not going to.
I have to go back into the living room and I don't know what to do.
God Dad, I know you needed someone to know, but I'm well weak.

Either way, no matter what happens, I'll look after it all.

[Harli]

I know that saying im sorry is a crappy thing to say, we just lost my dad from kidney cancer and i wont lie it was the most horrible thing to watch. I hope that your dad makes it through.

[LazyBard]

you have probally hear this from more then just me but you never know whats going to happen. My mom was diagnosed with a relapse in breast cancer 8 years after the first. The cancer was on the lower 5 vertebrae of the spine as well as the uppermost 3 vertebrae. There was a mass in her left kidney and it had eaten away her pelvic bones so the point they needed to do hip replacement surgery but refused to do it because how far advanced the cancer was. That was in October and at the time 3 different doctors tried to get her to check into a hospice, she refused she had her kidney removed 2 weeks ago and through some of the newer drugs and just radiation her cancer markers are below the avg persons. They dont say she is cured and she will have to do radiation off and one about twice a year and cont with the drugs but less then a year later they feel she can live comfortably without any pain from the cancer for 10+ years. Keep a positive additude and take it one day at a time and best wishes to you and your family

[Warriorbird]

I never felt quite so mortal as when my mother had two heart attacks in one week.

[Ilvane]

I'm so sorry to hear about your dad. I hope he is able to get treatment and do well with it.

I lost my dad a few years back now, at 59, it's really hard.

I hope it works out well for you though, and that he recovers and gets better.

Angela

[Asha]

I'm so sorry to hear about your dad. I hope he is able to get treatment and do well with it.

I lost my dad a few years back now, at 59, it's really hard.

I hope it works out well for you though, and that he recovers and gets better.

Angela

Thanks Angela.

[Asha]

you have probally hear this from more then just me but you never know whats going to happen. My mom was diagnosed with a relapse in breast cancer 8 years after the first. The cancer was on the lower 5 vertebrae of the spine as well as the uppermost 3 vertebrae. There was a mass in her left kidney and it had eaten away her pelvic bones so the point they needed to do hip replacement surgery but refused to do it because how far advanced the cancer was. That was in October and at the time 3 different doctors tried to get her to check into a hospice, she refused she had her kidney removed 2 weeks ago and through some of the newer drugs and just radiation her cancer markers are below the avg persons. They dont say she is cured and she will have to do radiation off and one about twice a year and cont with the drugs but less then a year later they feel she can live comfortably without any pain from the cancer for 10+ years. Keep a positive additude and take it one day at a time and best wishes to you and your family
I haven't had the chance to tell him he'll be ok and everything.
When I do I'll remember I'm not just lying.
Cheers man. I'll try to remember it might work out thanks to you.

[Gan]

You're Dad and your family is lucky to have someone with your strength and fortitude to see things through, even when you don't really want to have to do it. I cant sympathize with you, but I can empathize, because it really sucks when someone loses a parent.

Just remember, he's not gone yet. Live with him what time he's got left so that there's no regrets. And hopefully he will respond well to the treatment so that the time that is fleeting turns into something much longer.

[Asha]

You're Dad and your family is lucky to have someone with your strength and fortitude to see things through, even when you don't really want to have to do it. I cant sympathize with you, but I can empathize, because it really sucks when someone loses a parent.

Just remember, he's not gone yet. Live with him what time he's got left so that there's no regrets. And hopefully he will respond well to the treatment so that the time that is fleeting turns into something much longer.

He's a big fella and trust me this won't deck him.
And you're right, there won't be any regrets. The last thing we did tonight was drive home with the top down through country, laughing at how my mum would've gone NUTS and killed us for it.
I don't know about strength. But I know I can stick out whatever it is going to take.
And I won't ever lose him.
Thanks Gan. I appreciate it.
I thought posting something personal would be a mistake, but I'm glad I did, for that.

[Sharnath]

Ash, I got the same thing from my mother one day in our garage. 'I have breast cancer and bone cancer and the doctor tells me it's terminal.' Coming from a life long RN I thought that was the end of the world. It's three years later and mother is still here and back at work. For a year, my mother fought to stay alive and I fought to find a way to fix everything. I couldn't and neither can you. All you can do is savor every moment between now and tomorrow and hope for the best. Prayer can't hurt either if that's something you do. My prayers are with you and your family.

Sharnath
Weed Mage

[Amber]

Sorry to hear about your dad's cancer. I'm kinda sorta in a similar situation so can empathize. Guess the only advice I can give you is to take time to be with him and to try to be strong for him if he needs you to lean on from time to time. I recently moved from Dallas back to Washington to be here for my mom. The hardest thing I've ever done in my life, by far, is watching her suffering and knowing that there's nothing I can do to make things better for her. Cancer is such a horrible thing, but hopefully, like Sharnath and LazyBard's mothers, your father (and my mother) will come out of this strong as ever.

[Jolena]

Sweetie, you know that I can completely empathize with what you are going through. Hearing such a thing from your father (or anyone you love for that matter) is so difficult and mind boggling that sometimes you have to wonder if this is really happening, or just some twisted dream in another reality.

That being said, I will echo the same thoughts of a few others here, and tell you that knowing ahead of time is so much better than not. I finally made that trip to see my Dad, even though I really didn't want to go and see him in that state. It was the best thing I could have done, and I will never regret doing so. Those three weeks with him are what is keeping me going now that his cancer has progressed, and I think of how many people are out there who don't get the chance to do what I did. You are lucky to have that opportunity as well. Take advantage of it, hon.

I can't tell you anything that someone else hasn't already said, I'm sure, but you know that I'm here to listen if you need someone to talk to. Just keep in mind that having hope in his recovery is not a bad thing, even if it doesn't work out how you would like it to. I will pray for your father, and for you, in the hopes that you can take the best from this and keep good spirits in the face of such a difficult thing to deal with.

~Bree

[Latrinsorm]

Recognizing that this is a bit of an echo: you're not alone, Ash. That's unfortunately all I can say, but please keep it in mind.

[Stanley Burrell]

You're a good dude, Ash.

I'm projecting super mental positivity and hope, even if internet-based, for your father and you and those afflicted.

Also, my dad recovered from full-blown renal + adrenal carcinoma -- There is never a 100% death sentence. I just hope you can get as much information as possible. It's always good to just take a deep breath and get your bearings, as difficult as that can seem at times.

Like I said, I'm projecting mental positivity in your general direction. Alright,

- Ben G.

[ViridianAsp]

Make every last moment you have with him count. Make sure he knows just how much you care. I'm sure he'll know that you'll be there to make sure that everything will be okay.

My dad was taken from my family unexpectedly three years ago. And it's hard to think on how I didn't get to help make his last moments count, I didn't get to tell him just how much I loved and Respected him. Or how he was my Hero and how I appreciated all he did for me in life. Make sure you let your dad know...I think Dads need to know that.

[Nieninque]

[lots of cliches]
[lots more cliches]

Sorry you have this to deal with. Go get drunk, that's what I do. Doesnt solve anything, but its fun trying.