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Jolena
03-31-2007, 03:39 PM
This was pretty damned funny, in my opinion. Was posted on the officials in the dragonfly festival folder by Bacl.

Re: Festival Schedule? on 3/29/2007 3:19:43 AM 383


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>>I deny any knowledge of new GMs. - Votary<<
>>These are not the GMs you're looking for. - Troyan<<

Alright players, look alive! We've got some new meat at this festival, and it is up to us to tear each and every one of these fresh and innocent GMs to shreds.

Here's the gameplan:

#1 Start with what always works: Complaining! I'm happy to see that most of you have already started doing this, despite the fact the festival has not even started. Good work, but don't enjoy the festival so mucht hat you forget to complain everything from lack of 24/7 merchants to lack of low cost off the shelf 10x gear. If you spot any roleplay being led by a GM, smash it fast by complaining about how the GM should be altering YOUR items. Heck, if you see ANY roleplay...well, it is unlikely...but best to nip those things in the bud before they spread and soon people might one day even expect you do it!

#2 Now let's move on to more advanced tactics: Completely disregarding the alteration guidelines when you get picked by a merchant! Now, many people will suggest you can excel at this by intentionally not reading the alterations guidelines which are provided in game, but I respectfully disagree. My advice is to read them, and then try and think of alterations that completely go against as many rules as possible. "A glowing human-skin rogue's shirt which causes you to scream in fear simply by looking at it" is one example, but you can probably break even more rules if you put your mind to it. Make sure you don't accept "no" for an answer. Take the time to enter into a looong debate where you not only question the reasoning behind these rules which the GM did not personally create and has no authority to change, but be sure to question whther they know what they are doing. "Are you a new GM?" and "Just how long have you been playing?" are old classics which will aide you greatly.

#3 Let's talk detail-work: Causing trouble. This one is pretty self-explaintory, but can be difficult to master. The best way to suck fun out of the festival and give the GMs running it a nervous break down is to constantly be running around causing trouble. See someone you don't like? Make sure you tell them why in front of their friends. Don't be afraid to use tackle and web on a consenting friend to annoy the living pants off everyone else in the room. In a crowded room where everyone is trying the best they can to listen to a popular merchant? Make sure you take out your musical intrument, light up your incense, and start SINGING. In fact, just try to fidget, beam, gawk, agree, nod, wave, salute, and otherwise MOVE as much as you can when in the most crowded of rooms. And remember...this is a festival! That means you should be completely out of character at all times. The only reason you are here is to get altering work done. Don't talk unless it is to ask about a merchant. Don't whisper to a merchant or another player unless it is an OOC whisper. Start fights, and attack your friends to pass the time. Make sure to constantly comment on how you don't like the theme of the festival. if you meet a player who is having a good time and asks you excitedly, "Pretty great festival, eh?" Make sure you tell them, "No."

#4 The advanced mechanics: Accuse GMs of favoritism! This one is like gasoline and fire. Just a little and you spark a huge explosion. Go onto the message boards and post on how in 10 years of faithfully playing one character on one account you've never had a single alteration. Point out that you see the same people getting alterations and that they own 10 accounts and MA and are all terrible people. MAke sure you point out the the GMs are friends with them and that's why they are the same ones who get the same services. Threaten to cancel your account. Compare Simutronics to other companies, and then outline how Simutronics is not run as a business should be. Relate this to your lack of gaining an alteration within the first ten minutes of the festival. Remember to keep repeating that the GMs use favoritism and the spinners are rigged.

#5 Be creative! Don't say thank you. Write angry posts in this folder about things the the GMs either have no control over, or already ruled upon. Make it personal.

If we don't show these GMs who is boss they'll start thinking they can get away with anything...like more free events! Act like you paid for this event. Bring up events from ten years ago which were much better run and explain how the difference must be in the people running them! Remember, you pay their HUGE salaries! It's your money that put their kids in private school and bought them a Porshe for each day of the week! And we still don't have complete spell circles! Slackers! Tell them so! Make it personal!

Or...just have a good time, try not to complain, be ready with an acceptable alter when the merchant picks you, and put that damn intrument away! Whichever you prefer. ; )

Jolena
03-31-2007, 03:40 PM
Also, just on the informative side...


Re: Festival Schedule? &#183; on 3/29/2007 8:04:46 PM 400


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Stellar post, Bacl. I hope some of the people you described see themselves in that post, and try to remember a few things:

- It's free.
- It's supposed to be fun.
- Services will be spread out.
- It's a game.

Other than that, I'm working on a map for the Festival, but it might not find it's way to the Web site until after the start.

Festival start time will be 3:00 PM EDT on Sunday, April 1st.

I have not been asked to set up special portals. The Festival has been announced and calendared for a while now, you all know where to find maps to get to Cysaegir and I bet folks will be willing to lead people from Zul, T'V. and T'I, and the festival will be around for a month -- so getting there isn't really a hardship and merchant time is not as limited.

All shops should take all notes, unless a merchant has a good reason for keeping it limited.

My merchant will be doing tattoos.

Games are being planned and should be scheduled on the calendar.

I'll think about bring in the eye and hair color vials I sold at EG... as it's a bit late to be adding stuff at this point.

I just trained about 18 GMs or so how to alter Aelotoi wings, and I'll be checking those alterations to make sure they learned well! If you ask for something outside of the guideliness in ALTER and they make a mistake and give it to you, they will be told to find you and fix it -- BEWARE.

See you at the Festival!

--A.

Jolena
03-31-2007, 03:51 PM
And again, more information:

Re: Curious Request &#183; on 3/30/2007 2:38:58 PM 416


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I'll be raffling four custom spell preps throughout the month of April at the festival.

L (Lothwyn)




Re: Curious Request &#183; on 3/30/2007 8:36:06 PM 426


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They will be QC'd and limited to within reason.

No, they won't be pre-prepared custom, they are you and me work together custom.

No profession limited, if you can cast a spell you can win. No, they're not transferable, so don't enter if you can't use it.

And yes, Plat gets four as well since they're having the festival too.

L

Vilewoman68
03-31-2007, 03:53 PM
Ahhh, yes the wonderful world of merchants at an event. Let's all hope Sproink honors us with his stamp of many words and his flying bobbleheads

Dropped_In
03-31-2007, 04:29 PM
Custom spell preps?!
<panic>

Latrinsorm
03-31-2007, 06:49 PM
I just trained about 18 GMs or so how to alter Aelotoi wings, and I'll be checking those alterations to make sure they learned well! If you ask for something outside of the guideliness in ALTER and they make a mistake and give it to you, they will be told to find you and fix it -- BEWARE.Did they ever make the rules for wing alters non-retarculous?

Month-long chilled festival sounds good, anyway.

RichardCranium
03-31-2007, 07:27 PM
I'd give my left nut for "A glowing human-skin rogue's shirt which causes you to scream in fear simply by looking at it".

SpunGirl
03-31-2007, 08:04 PM
Really, I'm upset that he forgot to add this:

"When told NO by a merchant, be sure to remind them that you PAY TO PLAY THIS GAME AND SHOULD BE ABLE TO GET WHATEVERTHEHELLYOUWANT."

-K

The Ponzzz
03-31-2007, 09:16 PM
I SAY THAT ALL THE TIME LIKE WOAH!

Ignot
03-31-2007, 09:37 PM
http://www.krakiipedia.org/wiki/Image:DFFMap.jpg

here is a map of the festival

Back
03-31-2007, 09:50 PM
Looks like an awesome time.

Unfortunately I closed my accounts.

Ignot
03-31-2007, 10:12 PM
Looks like an awesome time.

Unfortunately I closed my accounts.

you can buy mine. i dont know why i keep it on still.

LordBacl
04-01-2007, 08:03 AM
This was pretty damned funny, in my opinion. Was posted on the officials in the dragonfly festival folder by Bacl.

Wow, thanks for the shout out, Jolena. I'm glad people got a laugh out of the post.

Here's the best reaction I got as a result of my little "joke"...



SEND[Khaladon] Look up...

You ask, "Eh?"
>
You ask, "Up?"
>
A bolt of lightning streaks down from the sky and strikes you!
... 20 points of damage!
Heavy shock to left hand. Fingers go numb.
You are stunned for 1 round!
stand

A tremendous crack of thunder follows instantly!
>
You are still stunned.
>
A bolt of lightning streaks down from the sky and strikes you!
... 20 points of damage!
Nasty jolt to abdomen makes your stomach turn. Urp.

A tremendous crack of thunder follows instantly!
>
A bolt of lightning streaks down from the sky and strikes you!
... 50 points of damage!
Horrifying electrical shock converts head into blood-stained glass. Death is a step up.
You become solid again.
The light blue glow leaves you.
The glowing specks of energy surrounding you suddenly shoot off in all directions, then quickly fade away.
The shimmering multicolored sphere fades from around you.
You no longer bristle with energy.
The dim aura fades from around you.
The deep blue glow leaves you.
The powerful look leaves you.
You feel your extra magical awareness leave you.
A luminescent aura fades from around you.
You feel your extra strength departing.
The air calms down around you.

It seems you have died, my friend. Although you cannot do anything, you are keenly aware of what is going on around you...

You mentally give a sigh of relief as you remember that the Goddess Lorminstra owes you a favor.

...departing in 10 mins...

A tremendous crack of thunder follows instantly!
>
* Bacl just bit the dust!

SEND[Khaladon] funniest post evah : )

>report Glad you enjoyed it...I think.
REPORT should only be used to notify the GemStone IV staff of emergency situations or gamewide technical errors. Please use ASSIST for general support.

SEND[Khaladon] but, you had to die, you know that.

You are healed.

>report I'm healed! It's favortism!
REPORT should only be used to notify the GemStone IV staff of emergency situations or gamewide technical errors. Please use ASSIST for general support.

You have just been awarded 1 experience points.

You have been awarded 1 silvers.

You make a horrendous warthog-like noise.

You say, "I'm worth twice that."
>
You have been awarded 1 silvers.

You exclaim, "That's better!"

>mychar thinks It must be a slow night.
You think to yourself, "It must be a slow night."

StrayRogue
04-01-2007, 09:40 AM
Shame most of it's true.