Family Affection?

[Caiylania]

This is out of curiosity, I know many different people from different states, countries, and cultures and everyone seems to have different views on affection with parents and children. In regards to that, I thought I would see where us PC'ers stand.

To clarify, this poll is in regards to non-abusive parents/families, to get an idea of the 'cultural' views on displays of affection among us.

The 'we' can either be you as parent to children, you as child to parent, or both... Feel free to clarify in your posts: I hug my kids all the time but my father didn't hug to often or My darn kids never hug me, the brats! Stuff like that. ;)

I voted top one. My family is very affectionate.

[Asha]

My family avoid eachother as much as possible.
When we eventually meet through forced occasion or general politeness we do hug and say ' I love you ', we laugh around the dinner table and sit in comfortable, smoky silence in front of the TV.
Then, when we leave we do our best to avoid eachother again.


There should be a category for guys who still kiss their dad on the lips.

[Caiylania]

Done!

[Skirmisher]

Darn poll is giving me an sql error :(

But I chose the first option: We hug and say I love you all the time.

[Warriorbird]

SQL error here too, but ditto to what Skirmisher said.

[HarmNone]

Poll's fixed. :)

[Skirmisher]

:cheers:

[Brattt8525]

My parents were not people to show affection at all, the first time I ever rememeber my mother hugging me was when I was 23. I hug my kids all the time and they are very affectionate and loving which is something I was not until I had kids.

I still have a problem showing or expressing affection to anyone other then my kids and that has led to relationship issues which I never want them to have to deal with.

Both of my kids hug me throughout the day or night, come lay on the couch with me to watch tv or just to talk with me and I enjoy the hell out of those times.

[Leetahkin]

We never say I love you, and now that we live far away, we hug hello and bye when one is visiting the other.

Some Aunts/Uncles are the kissy types on the lips, and I do so sometimes, but it's weird.

[Artha]

I still hug (and kiss) my parents, but "I love you"s are rare.

[Back]

We were never that affectionate until I made it a policy of hugging and kissing everyone. It has been met with positive warmth and is now the norm in our family. Where did I get the idea? When I lived in NY it was common to hug and kiss your friends upon arrival and departure on any occasion. It occurred to me this was not practice in our family and if I could manage it with ease with near strangers I ought to apply it to my family.

As a man I hug and kiss on the cheek every woman and handshake or hug, or combination of the two, every man.

We do not say I love you often, but every once in a while. It goes without saying.

[Jazuela]

I don't see my parents often because they live several states away from me. Usually when we visit, we hug when we get there, hug when we leave, and hug whoever's paying for dinner/making dinner (it varies depending on the day), that kind of thing. I love you is usually reserved for the time when we're leaving to come home.

My sister and I are kinda-sorta huggy with each other, and we do this kissy/smoochy thing where we'll pucker up, go to kiss each other's cheek, but do a "pffftttttbblttt" thing instead. It's just a sister thing I guess and everyone else giggles when they see it. But her husband does it now too - it's turning into a trend!

[SayGoodbye]

No hugging, no kissing, no I love you's. After my sister moved across the country however, we'd say "I love you" whenever we talked, same thing with her kids (my nephews). They get I love you's all the time... and buckets of candy.. My sister loves me!

[SpunGirl]

This is cute.

My family is really affectionate, we hug and say "I love you" all the time. This is something my parents did with me from the time I was a baby. I remember once when I was about 20, my mom mentioned something about my Grandpa on my Dad's side not being very affectionate. I said, "what are you talking about, we hug all the time." She said, "yeah, that's because you started doing that with him as a kid, you should have seen the look on his face the first time you ran to him and squeezed him."

I'm the same way with my friends. I think it's important to express to people (family or not) that you care about them, and it feels good to know that people care in return.

-K

[Bobmuhthol]

I neither hug nor kiss nor tell my parents that I love them. The same applies to the rest of my immediate family.

[Atlanteax]

Going to my Aunt's for Thanksgiving for my dad's side of the Family.

We don't hug and say the words.

But we do the solid handshakes and the courtesy hug.

It's more about respect and apprecation of each other with us.

.

Besides, the idea of hugging and saying the words makes me uncomfortable :P

[SpunGirl]

PS For three years now at work I've had to work holidays (like today). I know a lot of people come to Vegas with their significant other, especially if they don't have kids, but for some reason the holidays seem to bring the lonely people to the casinos in droves. I always think it's sad and while it sucks that I have to work, it makes me feel lucky to know I have a yummy husband and a family that wishes I were with them:)

[Hips]

We hug and say I love you occasionally. I think it would be less often, but since I'm away at school my mom freaks out when she has to leave after parent's weekend. :lol:

[xtc]

Ok, My Mom is a Brit and affectionate and always tells me she loves me. My Father (deceased) was a Muslim and not affectionate and rarely said he loved me, but I knew it from his actions. He was not affectionate in the hug/kiss sense but he would always put his hand on my shoulder and tell me I did a good job or would praise my academic and/or sporting accomplishments. I am not affectionate and my sister is affectionate. So I guess we are 50/50. Oh and we are normal, functional etc.

[Latrinsorm]

Mom: kiss cheek, hug, lots.
Dad: hug hello/goodbye after/preceding short to long absences. Because he was sick for a long time, this may be a recent developement, or it may be because my brothers and I are older now. I dunno.
Brothers: hugs only after long absences.
Aunts/grandma: Kiss cheek, hug. We only see each other after long absences, but I'm pretty sure this would also take place after short absences.
Uncles/cousins/grandpa: Hearty handshake.
Very, very close female friends reach hug level. I reckon this category will become broader as I get older.

At funerals and events of other extremely highly charged emotions, hugs become *far* more commonplace.

Saying "I love you" is very common parent-child and to my paternal grandmother. Otherwise, I think 0 except for particularly close females (obviously).

[Czeska]

My family is very huggy. It's always been that way. So are my very close friends (those I've had since HS). I can curl up on the couch with a few specific friends and cuddle while watching a movie, and it's just normal.

[Bobmuhthol]

<<I can curl up on the couch with a few specific friends and cuddle while watching a movie, and it's just normal.>>

Gross.

[Asha]

<<I can curl up on the couch with a few specific friends and 'cuddle' while watching a movie, and it's just normal.>>

There, I've fixed the grammar to reflect what you actually meant.
:heart: ya.

[Edited on 11-24-2005 by Drayal]

[Czeska]

Bob, don't go the "girls are icky" route in this thread. You'll likely grow out of it.

[MangledKitty]

We hug and say I love you a lot, we also fight a lot, too. :)

[Bobmuhthol]

<<Bob, don't go the "girls are icky" route in this thread. You'll likely grow out of it.>>

Girls are icky. Mine isn't, though. <3<3.

[Asha]

Ok so I clicked on your sig like 10 times.
: Stare Mangledkitty :


[Edited on 11-24-2005 by Drayal]

[DCSL]

Growing up, my mother smothered me with affection. I think that's why I have a distaste for demonstrative affection these days.

I do not say "I love you". I don't hug, unless I haven't seen them for six months or more and that's more for their sake, less because I actually want to.

The rest of my family is more demonstrative than I am but they're not touchy-feely, either.

[Viridian]

I used to hug my dad and tell him I loved him all the time. Same with my grandma, and my son, I hug and kiss him everyday and tell him I love him.

My step mother and my half-sisters and I no longer speak due to bad blood, but when on good terms my sisters and I would hug. Not so much saying "I love you to eachother." because that's just weird.


Uh my real mom and I we aren't affectionate at all. seeing as she was missing for seventeen years of my life, there isn't a lot of affection there.

[Vixen]

With my mother I can hug her and tell her that I love her. Sometimes. With anyone else its really hard for me to be touched. Theres a select group of people I can hug and be hugged by, and most of my relatives dont qualify. My son on the other hand, will probably need therapy from all the hugs and kisses and I love yous he gets from me

As for the rest of my family, the current ones that are here right now messing up things, I care less about hugging them and more about curbing the urge to take my electric turkey carver to them.

[MangledKitty]

Aw at Bob.

And lol and Drayal.

[Back]

Originally posted by DCSL
Growing up, my mother smothered me with affection. I think that's why I have a distaste for demonstrative affection these days.

I do not say "I love you". I don't hug, unless I haven't seen them for six months or more and that's more for their sake, less because I actually want to.

The rest of my family is more demonstrative than I am but they're not touchy-feely, either.

Isn’t it funny how some people grow with something then reject it, other grow up without something and seek it, still others grow up with something and continue the practice.

I am the opposite. Not much affection in my family when I was growing up so now I’m an affection hound. woof.

[DCSL]

Originally posted by Backlash

Isn’t it funny how some people grow with something then reject it, other grow up without something and seek it, still others grow up with something and continue the practice.


It probably helps that I haven't always had the best relationship with my mother. So there's associated negativity, I suppose.

[Caiylania]

Originally posted by Czeska
So are my very close friends... I can curl up on the couch with a few specific friends and cuddle while watching a movie, and it's just normal.

Ditto!


Originally posted by Viridian
I used to hug my dad and tell him I loved him all the time. Same with my grandma, and my son, I hug and kiss him everyday and tell him I love him.

......

Uh my real mom and I we aren't affectionate at all. seeing as she was missing for seventeen years of my life, there isn't a lot of affection there.

Replace Dad with Mom, grandma with grandparents, son with daughter, and Mom with Dad, and ... ditto!

Oh and seventeen with fifteen.

[Satira]

My whole family is really affectionate. Definitely with everyone including aunt, uncles and cousins, we hug a lot and say I love you. With my mom and grandma I still give them a peck on the cheek or lips here and there as well.