Advice On Evil Teachers!

[ElvenRangeress]

the other day someone called my early child care teacher looking for a baby sitter, i said i'd do it, she glanced at me and was like put your hand down you dont even come to school (five days a quarter i miss), i was so upset because even though i miss alot of school, i do my work and get better grades than over half of the school. anyhow, i told her how and why i did qualify for the job, about how i baby sat since i was 12, helped out at the elem schools and how i really wanna be an elem school teacher, and bla bla bla, any how i was like, ok please if anyone else calls lemmie know i would love to get a job, she said yes, then today someone called and i raised my hand to do it, and she gave it to someone else, not only that she took my interim and changed the grade from a b plus to a lower grade, she's a freaking witch! and then she said i miss to many days, but dangit she promised me the job! i was so upset, and my eyes got puffy, i was like i need to help my mom, she's losing hours in her job and has cancer eatting her alive, and then walked out and went to the office, and went home

i need advice really, on how i should handle situations like these... but its not the only thing, i mean i really liked this specific teacher ... i helped her when she needed it and everything :sniffle:

(i realize missing school is a bad thing, and alot of people judge me on how i do that... but i had a job before and went every single day, and finally i got fed up with it because the ac was broke, and the people sucked big time, and they had me working 9 hours after school, closing shifts, i eventually left and when i got upset, she rubbed that in too! hrmmm and i don't miss when i work, i miss school because they hand us five days and say thats days we are allowed to miss, so i take advantage of them, if they didn't hand us any days, i'd go!)

[Edited on 9-25-2003 by ElvenRangeress]

[StrayRogue]

For one, I think you need to be able to atleast write correctly, with capitalization, grammar and spelling, before you even try teaching such things to others.

[ElvenRangeress]

for once, stop being mean to me, i need advice, i'm not trying to impress you or anyone with grammer or such, i'm upset, and grammer's the least of my problems right now.

[Edited on 9-25-2003 by ElvenRangeress]

[StrayRogue]

No, it is a damn good point I think. If you can't even speak correctly, or even put a capital on the first letter of the first word on a sentence, or even on an "I", then I don't think you are fit to be teaching young children.

Maybe this teacher has noticed this. If you can't even attend school, maybe you are considered a liability and unfit to teach. If you want to be a teacher, you have to work fucking hard.

[Suppa Hobbit Mage]

Aside from grammAR, you may want to work on spelling and punctuation.

[ElvenRangeress]

Uhm this is about baby sitting ... stay on the subject alright? I use proper grammar when need be, right now I'm upset and could really care less.

[Edited on 9-25-2003 by ElvenRangeress]

[ElvenRangeress]

Thanks guys. Really, look at the other threads, the *ceating* one for example, go pick at him, he's hurt too. But no you come and harass me because of my own mistakes, I asked for advice, not for you being mean and cold towards me.

[StrayRogue]

As you said, if you can't even attend school properly, how is she meant to know you are going to be responsible enough to look after children?

You work for what you get in life, unless you are born rich, and I guess the "witch" gave the job to someone who had worked for it, earned her trust, and who was probably the best for the job.

Part of growing up is realizing that "me me me" and "I want I want I want" isn't the best for the rest of the world.

[StrayRogue]

We're giving you advice. You are just too blind. For once, ONCE take what we say beyond face value, think about it, absorb it, and GROW UP.

[ElvenRangeress]

I already look after children Stay. And I'm very good with them, I teach them their abc's and everything they need. Just because I'm upset and typing bad on a message doesn't mean thats how I am in real life.

[Snapp]

<<they had me working 9 hours after school, closing shifts, i eventually left and when i got upset, she rubbed that in too! >>

If you are a minor, that's illegal. ;) Just thought I'd point that out. As far as the teacher thing, don't know what to tell you.

[ElvenRangeress]

Thats the thing though, I have earned her trust, so its ok for me to be her slave and help her out basically with everything dealing with children, and with her *personal* problems...... but not for *her* to keep a promise. She could of said no in the first place, and the other girls she picked are never at school either, and I have better grades than they have, AND I've been in her class longer. Its not being a baby, its being teased really.

[HarmNone]

I can point out one problem I see with your thinking, Candi. Just because you are allowed five days absence does not mean those five days must be taken. To say: "if they didn't hand us any days, I'd go." shows a pretty high level of immaturity.

Going to school is for your benefit, not theirs. You are taking the class, supposedly, to better yourself and to learn something. Doing what is expected and going a step beyond in these situations shows maturity. Taking advantage of loopholes shows immaturity. Perhaps that is what your teacher is seeing, as well. :)

HarmNone is answering the question asked

[StrayRogue]

How you present yourself anywhere, reflects on yourself. If you are going to be lazy here, or in class, who is to say you aren't going to be lazy in reality? You may not be, and yes it may be our problem for not realizing this, but as my Dad always tells me, "You only have one chance to make a first impression".

[imported_Kranar]

Working after school isn't illegal. It's only illegal to make someone work during school hours if they're under 16.

[ElvenRangeress]

No teacher's are actually *mad* that I miss five days a school, and that I still maintain a 3.7 gpa... and the fact she picked another person with more problems then me isn't really ... right..

[Edited on 9-25-2003 by ElvenRangeress]

[StrayRogue]

*nods to Harmnone*

[StrayRogue]

You're right, most teachers wouldn't care. Its not skin of their nose you are missing out on education. Its your own problem you will suffer for in later life.

[Snapp]

<Working after school isn't illegal. It's only illegal to make someone work during school hours if they're under 16.>

Working after school is not illegal, correct.. working that many hours in combination with school IS. They cannot have school + work for more then 12 hours per day if under 18.. if under 16 its even less.

[imported_Kranar]

Interesting, never knew that.

[ElvenRangeress]

If I thought I was missing out on education I'd go, but having A's, and one B and missing five days probably shows that specific teacher that they are a bad teacher or are to easy for me. I guess? And it makes them feel like crap..

[HarmNone]

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
No teacher's are actually *mad* that I miss five days a school, and that I still maintain a 3.7 gpa... and the fact she picked another person with more problems then me isn't really ... right..

[Edited on 9-25-2003 by ElvenRangeress]

Candi, just because people do not indicate that they are "mad" at you, is that a reason not to do your very best? You said you take the five days off because they are there to be taken, not because you really need to take them.

Think about what you are doing. Look into yourself for the problem instead of comparing yourself to others and seeking to place the blame for your difficulties on others.

If it were me, I might just go to the teacher and sit down and have a long talk. Ask her what she feels you might be able to do to better gain her respect. There is a problem, Candi. It is not with everyone else. It is with you. Make an effort to find out what it is and then change it.

HarmNone has said her say

[ElvenRangeress]

Working 9 hours a day and getting home at 12/1am really is a hard thing to do, and her rubbing that in my face that I quit wasn't really professional now was it? I mean the point of this thread in the first place is for people to give me advice on how to handle situations, not why the teacher did it. All I really asked for. But if your going to answer both, its really the fact that the teacher said in the first place she'd get me the job, then chose the girl right next to me who does even worst in school.

[HarmNone]

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
If I thought I was missing out on education I'd go, but having A's, and one B and missing five days probably shows that specific teacher that they are a bad teacher or are to easy for me. I guess? And it makes them feel like crap..

Yeesh! If you are not there, you are missing the education that is offered on that particular day, Candi. Grades are not the only deciding factor. There is that little thing called responsibilty!

Stop making excuses for yourself and get to work making some changes!:rolleyes:

HarmNone is trying hard not to get royally pissed here

[ElvenRangeress]

Originally posted by HarmNone

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
No teacher's are actually *mad* that I miss five days a school, and that I still maintain a 3.7 gpa... and the fact she picked another person with more problems then me isn't really ... right..

[Edited on 9-25-2003 by ElvenRangeress]

Candi, just because people do not indicate that they are "mad" at you, is that a reason not to do your very best? You said you take the five days off because they are there to be taken, not because you really need to take them.

Think about what you are doing. Look into yourself for the problem instead of comparing yourself to others and seeking to place the blame for your difficulties on others.

If it were me, I might just go to the teacher and sit down and have a long talk. Ask her what she feels you might be able to do to better gain her respect. There is a problem, Candi. It is not with everyone else. It is with you. Make an effort to find out what it is and then change it.

HarmNone has said her say

I guess I blended those together a bit wrong eh.. I meant.... NO, the teachers do get mad at me...

[HarmNone]

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
Working 9 hours a day and getting home at 12/1am really is a hard thing to do, and her rubbing that in my face that I quit wasn't really professional now was it? I mean the point of this thread in the first place is for people to give me advice on how to handle situations, not why the teacher did it. All I really asked for. But if your going to answer both, its really the fact that the teacher said in the first place she'd get me the job, then chose the girl right next to me who does even worst in school.

There is a message in the teacher's choice, Candi. I am willing to bet it is the same message that we, here, are trying to get across to you.

HarmNone

[ElvenRangeress]

Seriously HarmNone ..poke.. calm down a bit. The teacher's don't even *teach*. They pass out worksheets and thats ALL. Same thing every day.

But I never disagreed with any of you, really was just saying she said she'd give me the job, then picked another..

[Edited on 9-25-2003 by ElvenRangeress]

[ElvenRangeress]

Kind of a broken promise thing.

[HarmNone]

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
I guess I blended those together a bit wrong eh.. I meant.... NO, the teachers do get mad at me...

Of course, they get mad at you. You are expected to attend class unless you are too ill, or otherwise totally unable to attend, Candi. It is the responsible thing to do.

Did it ever occur to you that the teachers might just be expecting you to live up to your potential and are trying to press you into doing so? It has sure occurred to me!

HarmNone is still trying

[ElvenRangeress]

I could really live without your getting pissed and still trying things, I'm not a baby and hard to talk to. Just struggling to understand whats being said to me. ;o)

[HarmNone]

Forget the broken promise. It was never a promise. All she said she would do was tell you if there was another babysitting opportunity. She did not say that she would give you a job!

You are looking for a reason to blame this on the teacher. It is not her problem. It is your problem. Sit down with her and ask what she thinks you might do to make things better. Please.

HarmNone

[ElvenRangeress]

Originally posted by HarmNone
Forget the broken promise. It was never a promise. All she said she would do was tell you if there was another babysitting opportunity. She did not say that she would give you a job!

You are looking for a reason to blame this on the teacher. It is not her problem. It is your problem. Sit down with her and ask what she thinks you might do to make things better. Please.

HarmNone


No she said the next time someone called, she WOULD give me the job. Why I got upset in the first place.

[StrayRogue]

All I am gonna say is we are giving you advice. It is not the ass-kissing, hugs and shit you expected, but cold-faced advice, something you didn't (but should have) expected, and now lack the maturity to accept. Thats all I am gonna say as I feel I am wasting time on a lost cause.

[ElvenRangeress]

Well I'd rather you just not reply to my posts at all, you seem to have something bad to say about me on every post I make. Bad *grammar*, and how I'm this that or the other. I didn't ask you to pick at how I spell when I'm upset, all I wanted was advice. If you want to give some good, I will listen. But don't start the grammar crap on me.

[Edited on 9-25-2003 by ElvenRangeress]

[HarmNone]

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
I could really live without your getting pissed and still trying things, I'm not a baby and hard to talk to. Just struggling to understand whats being said to me. ;o)

In answer to this, I will tell you, Candi... you can be very, very frustrating.

You must admit, you have problems here on the forums, and now you are having problems at school. You asked for advice and possible reasons for the problem you were having at school. People tried to let you know what might be wrong, and you started with the excuses. It makes it very difficult to believe you are even hearing what others are saying.

I do care, Candi. I do sense your frustration here. However, others also become frustrated. It is human nature to do so when your efforts seem in vain.

HarmNone

[CrystalTears]

Okay, from what I gathered, she didn't promise you she'd get you a job, just seems like she'd consider you. Although if you see that she is taking your attendance very seriously, perhaps you should attend every single day from here on out to prove to yourself and your teachers that you are responsible enough to show up everyday for work.

How you present yourself at school, especially with those that have the ability to give you recommendations for a job, means everything and you should take that seriously.

As as said previously, just because you're allowed a certain amount of days for excused absences doesn't mean you should take them unless necessary. If it becomes habitual, schools and employers take that into consideration.

Even though I tend to disagree with Stay once in a while, I do need to agree with him here. His opinion wasn't really to flame you, it was to point out that as a teacher, you should ALWAYS be meticulous about how you present yourself, both professionally and socially. If you don't care about your writing skills either in school, at work, or at play, you will find yourself making mistakes where you shouldn't because you're not always conscious of what you are stating. Just because this is a game message boards doesn't mean your spelling and grammar should be any less important. How you type speaks volumns of your professionalism as a person, teacher, player or anything else in this world. You'll be taken more seriously if you cared a little more about your presentation.

[StrayRogue]

lol, I totally understand everyone's frustrations with you. You act like a total child. What I said was advice. If you want me to be nasty, I can be. Grow up.

[ElvenRangeress]

I hear what your saying, but people are giving me advice on things I really don't need on... I know I'm spelling bad, and everything else, I'm upset what do they expect? And its not just that, its the fact that I'm telling you what happened, I'm not pushing a teacher into the corner smacking her hand, I'm saying, this teacher said she would let me know if anyone called for a baby sitter, and give me that job if indeed that was to happen... and well someone called.

[HarmNone]

>ok please if anyone else calls lemmie know i would love to get a job, she said yes, <

That is from your original post. That statement does not say the teacher will give you the job. If what the teacher said was different than that, we cannot know from the above statement.

HarmNone

[ElvenRangeress]

Originally posted by StrayRogue
lol, I totally understand everyone's frustrations with you. You act like a total child. What I said was advice. If you want me to be nasty, I can be. Grow up.

Please don't post on my thread, I'm really sick of you at this point. You grow up for once, your the one who claims everyone is a 14 year old something. If you have a problem IM me, but for right now I'm having my own problems and don't need you to add to it. Just for once, walk away, leave me alone, pretend I don't exsist.

[StrayRogue]

Atleast someone agrees with me CT ;)

[StrayRogue]

Trust me Atheana, walking away laughing, is an easy thing to do. Why don't you do it for a change?

[ElvenRangeress]

I know I should crystaltears, present myself well here with proper grammar ect ect, but while writing the post, I just wanted to get it all out and for it to be gone. Alot of people have done that here, so I didn't think twice about it. Just wanted advice. I'm getting some, although I seem to be explaining this stuff wrong, because I had it all ready to say and screwed up big time. She promised me she'd get me the job, me and her did sit down and talked. But she knows I can come to school, she knows I'm reliable. She knows this. I missed school about two days this quarter because I *was* actually sick t his year. Last year in her class I missed five days the first month actually, but then I went everyday after that. And she was like, wow you actually can come to school, I seriously thought you didn't have it in you and I guess you proved me wrong. Its wierd because she's so hard to prove wrong.

[ElvenRangeress]

Originally posted by StrayRogue
Trust me Atheana, walking away laughing, is an easy thing to do. Why don't you do it for a change?

I made this thread for advice, not to walk away and not get some because you like to be cold towards me. Just please, leave me alone right now. I'm listening to the other people are helping me, trying to get this all out.

[CrystalTears]

Continue to prove to her that you are reliable and can show up everyday, and perhaps she will give you that opportunity. Just don't blame this solely on her. I'm sure she has to weigh in certain factors to give one of her students a job, knowing that if anything goes wrong, it will reflect negatively on her, so I'm sure she feels she needs to be completely sure of the choice she makes.

Don't take it too personally if you know you're doing your best to improve. She has an obligation too. I'm very happy for you that you're making good grades, but that's not the most important thing in this world, especially when it comes to child care. Responsibility is key, so keep up the good work of showing up to school and you'll see that chance soon enough.

[HarmNone]

The only thing I can think of to say, Candi, is that there is a problem with the way you are being perceived by the teachers. You said the teachers (note the plural) were "mad" at you. That is an indication that you are doing something, or behaving in some manner, that is creating a bad image with them. My guess, from what I have observed here, is that they are seeing immaturity in thought and behavior that is inconsistent with your age. That is not going to help you at all, especially in getting jobs caring for other people's children.

You need some good, intensive work with your presentation, and your thinking, Candi. I am not saying this to belittle you, but to help you. You come off like a child, and this is not working in your favor. It is up to you to recognize that the problem lies with you, and to do something to correct it.

HarmNone quotes Dr. Phil: "And how is that working for you?"

[CrystalTears]

Oh and don't ever let them see you cry. Teachers and employers can't tolerate people who cry upon rejection. They consider that a sign of weakness. A weak individual wanting to take care of children is just bad joojoo.

[Adhara]

Candi I have several things to say to you since you did ask for advice. First of all, the point on grammar and spelling. People who do care about grammar and spelling pay close attention to it no matter how upset they are. That you know how to spell and write correctly and choose not to is what worries me the most. It means you don't care much and will do it only when you think it matters. That is very bad for a future teacher. For example, say you write on the board with correct spelling. You sit down at your desk and write a short note in your agenda about something you need to do the next day. The note is for your eyes only (or so you think) and you don't pay attention to spelling. Next, a kid comes up to your desk to ask a question. He glances down at your agenda and reads the note full of mistakes. What message does this convey? My point is that as a future teacher, you should *always* try your best to spell and write correctly, no matter what mood you are in. Personally I don't care if you can't spell on the boards. What I'm saying is that *you* should care.

Alright now on to the babysitting. I have a feeling you are good with children. The teacher however, as some have pointed out, is looking for more than good grades. She seems to be a good judge of character. Missing days is a bad thing. Even if you are allowed to do it. The teacher must have seen signs of laziness and irresponsibility and the missing of days is only the ultimate confirmation of this. Missing the days per se would not be a problem if it was justified but I have a feeling the teacher *knows* that it's not justified in your case. Demonstrate that you want this badly by doing everything in your power. Good grades is part of it but attendance and hard work are also important if more subtle signs that you are the person for the job. If I had to give a job to someone and I was presented with a choice between:

student A: always shows up to class, works very hard, has moderately good grades

and

student B: is lazy and takes days off because she knows she can but has better grades

I would pick A without thinking about it twice.

Last but perhaps most importantly of all, you close yourself to criticism. You become defensive when we try to open your eyes and make up excuses. I can tell you that at the time of posting this, all the people that have posted so far in this thread are trying to HELP you. Even Stay which you seem to think is only here to flame you. Some don't have the patience to deal with you. You need to step back and look at this advice we're giving you. It's *good* advice. There are dozens of years of experience combined in here trying to help you you.

[Edited on 9-25-2003 by Adhara]

[ElvenRangeress]

And I appreciate all of the advice given to me, and I don't wright incorrectly at all. And I've missed two days from her class this year because I was sick. And last, I only write bad sometimes, and thats on the boards, I make sure I have correct spelling in real life. ;o)

[Edited on 9-25-2003 by ElvenRangeress]

[CrystalTears]

So writing on a message boards isn't real life? What is it then?

[Adhara]

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
i was so upset because even though i miss alot of school,

i miss school because they hand us five days and say thats days we are allowed to miss, so i take advantage of them, if they didn't hand us any days, i'd go!



Sounds to me like you missed more than 2 days in a year.

Additional advice: I have noticed that you do this a lot as a part of you defense mechanism. Not only do you find excuses for your actions, you also minimize them. "Missing a lot of school" mysteriously turned into "I only missed two days this year."

[peam]

Welcome to the real world.

As you reach higher levels of education, you'll see that each individual teacher has his or her own policy towards attendance, grading, etc.

My advice would be to do research before picking your classes next go around.

[ElvenRangeress]

I meant since school started this year, I've missed but two days. And thats still not good enough for her, even though I really was sick and had a doc.'s note.

(I did miss alot of school last year, and as you can see I'm NOT pretending as if I didn't.)

[Edited on 9-25-2003 by ElvenRangeress]

[CrystalTears]

Okay enough with the attendance excuses. You admitted that you missed a lot last year. She's probably waiting another year for you to prove her otherwise. Changes don't happen immediately just because YOU say you've done better.

[Scott]

I taught for my advisor’s class a lot in college. I would guess that I taught probably 3/4 of the semester once. So pretty much I was the professor of the class. I would I need someone to help me out since I really didn't have the time to do everything, so I offered a person extra credit/references for internships to whoever was willing to help me out. Since I couldn't give it to the whole class, I would have to choose a very limited number.

He/She was chosen by how much effort they put towards the class. It wasn't always that A student or the A- student who was ALMOST at that A. It was the person that put forth the most effort. That was the person that worked hard in class no matter how easy or difficult the task was. It was the person that showed up all the time, even if they knew the class was going to be boring. Most of the time, the person I chose to help me out was a C-B student. They just didn’t have the talent of some of the 4.0 students, but they worked their ass off to get their grades. Grades don’t mean everything. In fact, they mean nothing to me. People who I would suggest for internships and job interviews were normally not A students.

In college you have some professors that don’t care if you show up for class, and some that make in mandatory. Everyone looks at it from a different perspective. This goes the same with jobs. Jobs don’t always pick the person with the best grades or the most experienced. Maybe if instead of complaining about why this teacher didn’t pick you, you instead try to prove to this teacher why she made a mistake. That means showing up all the time and working hard while you are there. The best way to make someone realize they made a mistake is to prove them wrong.

[StrayRogue]

Damn right Sintik. To me, it seems that Atheana isn't making an effort, and the fact she cried, shows me should couldn't handle the pressure. I'll bet you a $ the teacher saw this too.

[HarmNone]

Originally posted by StrayRogue
Damn right Sintik. To me, it seems that Atheana isn't making an effort, and the fact she cried, shows me should couldn't handle the pressure. I'll bet you a $ the teacher saw this too.

Yep. That is how I see it, as well. I would much rather see a person who works hard to live up to their potential than one who cruises along giving only what he/she must. The former is the one who will do well in life; the latter is doomed to failure unless changes are made.

Good luck to you, Candi. I hope we have made some sense to you, and that you take what people have given you here to heart. It can only help you. :)

HarmNone

[DCSL]

Stay, you remind me of a shark. Scent a little blood in the water and you go into a feeding frenzy and rip the bleeding source to shreds.

We all know that I'm not particularly partial to Candi, in fact I think she's a bit of a flake, and I really don't respect her weird hip attachment to Darren (I think that's his name... I remember it's like Klaive's but not quite.. blah.) But in this case, I don't think she's completely at fault.

Maybe it's just that I have sympathy for missing school (in high school I got really sick for half of senior year and was completely tied to the house, and later, in college, I had to work full time to afford my classes but that left very little time for homework and sleep, let alone the school I worked so hard for, so I had alot of trouble then too..) But I don't think Candi deserves to be ripped to shreds quite THIS badly.

There ARE extentuating circumstances and she's obviously under a lot of pressure to crack so easily under a teacher's disapproval. I'm sure she doesn't need any more from the boards.

I'll back up HarmNone's advice and say that you should schedule an appointment with the teacher to speak to her. Don't whine, just explain... there is a difference.

[CrystalTears]

Other than the back and forth between her and Stay since they have their own personal dislike issues, most of the posts in this thread have been helpful ones and not flaming in any way. She is actually the one who got defensive with the answers she was receiving, which in turn causes others to be defensive as well.

Just out of curiosity, Candi, how long have you been in school, and how long with this particular teacher? How many times has she had opportunities which she passed you on? Perhaps a bit more history will help us pinpoint a better course of action for you. So far the only information we have is that she turned you down for two jobs. Were there more?

[Ravenstorm]

:jumps on the bandwagon!

More seriously, I need to agree completely with CT, SR, and HN. I have no clue who Elvenrangeress is offline or in GS nor do I particularly care. But girl, if you present yourself offline like you did in this thread, I wouldn't let you near kids.

I suppose you're going to take this as a flame but if you do, that just proves the point. Lots of excuses, lousy presentation, emotional over logical, circular reasoning... I'm sorry but I am so unimpressed with how you've reacted to everyone who's trying to answer your question and giv eyou solid advice. And that includes StrayRogue.

He's right. CrystalTears is right. HarmNone is right. It seems pretty clear you need to prove yourself to your teacher and the way you're trying to prove yourself here illustrates why. I strongly suggest rereading all your posts and trying to be objective as if they were written by another person with that problem. You might see why everyone has said what they have and that will help you with your teacher. And with people in general, for that matter.

Raven

[ElvenRangeress]

And as I mentioned many times before, I don't act how I do on these boards, in real life. But this thread isn't about being a teacher or whatever, I already work with children at the school, and in this teacher's classroom. She knows how I am towards children and always compliments me. And as for Stay, I worked my butt off to get the grades I have and I do go to school, I was sick twice this year, and thats about it. i'm doing much better this year. As for CT's questions, I'll respond to that later, I have to go right now

[Scott]

I'm wondering here. You siad you missed 2 days this year. Doesn't school start the first week of september or the end of August? So you've missed 2 days in the first month of school?

[CrystalTears]

Doh! Good point, Sintik.

Oh and when I said how long you've been in school, mention how many quarters you've attended.

[Adhara]

Yes I think that's what she means. 2 days in the past 3-4 weeks.

[ElvenRangeress]

correct adhara... and my school year for this year... started aug 25th

(we've been in school five weeks now)

[Edited on 9-25-2003 by ElvenRangeress]

[HarmNone]

> i miss school because they hand us five days and say thats days we are allowed to miss, so i take advantage of them, if they didn't hand us any days, i'd go!>

Going back to her original post, I found the above comment. I think that really speaks volumes to this issue. Candi, herself, says she "takes advantage" of the days allowed, rather than put the required importance on attending class. It says a lot about her attitude, in my opinion.

HarmNone does not intend to be judgemental, but cannot ignore what is plainly said

[Drew2]

I've missed like 5 days in the past 3-4 weeks.

::listens to the sound of no one surprised::

[Scott]

Well that explains a lot. I wouldn't nominate you for anything if you've already missed 2 days in 3 weeks. You expect someone to say you are the best for the job when you're missing class like this so far? You should expect this until you prove otherwise. Missing 2 days every 3 weeks is not acceptable.

[ElvenRangeress]

I won't lie, last year I did take advantage of those days given to me, but the first nine weeks of that class. the last quarter and this new quarter i am currently in, all together from last year, i've missed three days, so she knows i come to school.

[HarmNone]

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
correct adhara... and my school year for this year... started aug 25th

(we've been in school five weeks now)

[Edited on 9-25-2003 by ElvenRangeress]

You said you were really sick for these two days, Candi. It is expected for us to be absent when we are sick. However, you are still being judged on last year, and that will continue for awhile. When we mess up time is required before people can, and will, believe in us again.

HarmNone

[Scott]

Originally posted by Tayre
I've missed like 5 days in the past 3-4 weeks.

::listens to the sound of no one surprised::

Depends on the professor. I remember going to a class 3 times all year. First day, midterm, and final. I got an A in that class too. Some teachers expect you there, some don't....

[CrystalTears]

Wait a second. How many days a week is your class? 3? In a month that's about 12 classes, so you've already missed 1/6 of your days? You don't see anything wrong with already missing days the first month of school? No seriously, not being mean or anything, but seriously, you don't see anything wrong with that? Even when you have a job and you miss a day in the first 3 months, they're already thinking, "Calling out already?!"

[ElvenRangeress]

Originally posted by Gemstone101
Well that explains a lot. I wouldn't nominate you for anything if you've already missed 2 days in 3 weeks. You expect someone to say you are the best for the job when you're missing class like this so far? You should expect this until you prove otherwise. Missing 2 days every 3 weeks is not acceptable.

I'll say this again. Five weeks school has been in session. And I'm not trying to be nominated for anything, the woman promised me the job and then turned her nose away. Thats screwed up.

[ElvenRangeress]

Originally posted by CrystalTears
Wait a second. How many days a week is your class? 3? In a month that's about 12 classes, so you've already missed 1/6 of your days? You don't see anything wrong with already missing days the first month of school? No seriously, not being mean or anything, but seriously, you don't see anything wrong with that? Even when you have a job and you miss a day in the first 3 months, they're already thinking, "Calling out already?!"

Uhmm school is five days a week, and we are on the sixth week next week...

[ElvenRangeress]

Originally posted by CrystalTears
Wait a second. How many days a week is your class? 3? In a month that's about 12 classes, so you've already missed 1/6 of your days? You don't see anything wrong with already missing days the first month of school? No seriously, not being mean or anything, but seriously, you don't see anything wrong with that? Even when you have a job and you miss a day in the first 3 months, they're already thinking, "Calling out already?!"

And about the job thing, I didn't miss one day when I had the job. I went every day, 5 minutes early. Had the job for a while, but then the hours got insane.

[Scott]

She didn't promise you anything. She's offering the job to the best QUALIFIED student. That would be the person that will be there no matter what. You need to prove yourself. From what you said she said she'd consider you, which she did. You turned out not to be the best person. Welcome to the real world.

[HarmNone]

I am curious about something else, Candi. How many classes are you taking? If more than one, how many of the other classes have you missed?

HarmNone

[CrystalTears]

Oh damn. Stupid me. I thought you were in college.

For this job, did your teacher know of your attendance?

[ElvenRangeress]

Sintik I never said she considered me. She TOLD ME YESTERDAY that if someone else called, she WOULD have recommended me, but no she went and chose the person next to me, who has missed more days than me, and who has lower grades then me. So how is that particular person better then me?

[Adhara]

People change their mind. The teacher had no contract. Perhaps she did mean to give you the job then saw something about you she hadn't noticed before and changed her mind.

Why don't you take Harmnone's advice and make an appointment with her to find out what happened?

[Edited on 9-25-2003 by Adhara]

[ElvenRangeress]

Originally posted by CrystalTears
Oh damn. Stupid me. I thought you were in college.

For this job, did your teacher know of your attendance?

She sure did.

[CrystalTears]

Good lord woman, why do you ask advice when you want to argue with everyone about it, saying we don't understand what's going on?

Either you be really specific or let it go and speak to your teacher about how you feel.

[Ravenstorm]

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
And I'm not trying to be nominated for anything, the woman promised me the job and then turned her nose away. Thats screwed up.

Somehow, I suspect you heard what you wanted to hear which is not what she said. But even if she lied outright, all I
can say is get over it. She doesn't owe you anything and maybe she just said yes to get you to stop going on and on about it. It happens. Move on.

Raven

[Scott]

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
Sintik I never said she considered me. She TOLD ME YESTERDAY that if someone else called, she WOULD have recommended me, but no she went and chose the person next to me, who has missed more days than me, and who has lower grades then me. So how is that particular person better then me?

I don't know either of you. All I know from here is you break down under pressure. That is a big problem when dealing with children. I also know you you can't deal with criticism, another big problem when dealing with children. Sorry, from what I've seen here, I wouldn't recommend you either..... You can claim you are SO much different in real life then here. However these forums do tell me a little about you. There is no way you deal with criticism in real life when you can't handle it at all here......

[HarmNone]

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
I'll say this again. Five weeks school has been in session. And I'm not trying to be nominated for anything, the woman promised me the job and then turned her nose away. Thats screwed up.

No, that is not screwed up. That is life. If you are not the best person for the job, you are not going to get the job. It is a very simple concept.

Also, I must again point out that your original post does not show the teacher as "promising" you anything. She promised to consider you should another job possiblity arise...that is, unless she said: "Candi, the next job that opens up is yours.". Somehow, I doubt she said that at all.

[ElvenRangeress]

Not saying anything, chill out. Just saying what it seems you guys missed. Your saying i'm doing something wrong, by missing so many days ... you were confused and i corrected you. Five days a week, sixth week begins this comming monday, and I've missed two days.

[ElvenRangeress]

Originally posted by HarmNone

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
I'll say this again. Five weeks school has been in session. And I'm not trying to be nominated for anything, the woman promised me the job and then turned her nose away. Thats screwed up.

No, that is not screwed up. That is life. If you are not the best person for the job, you are not going to get the job. It is a very simple concept.

Also, I must again point out that your original post does not show the teacher as "promising" you anything. She promised to consider you should another job possiblity arise...that is, unless she said: "Candi, the next job that opens up is yours.". Somehow, I doubt she said that at all.

I already told you this, she said ...

"If someone calls, I will make sure you get it." and thats her exact words.

[ElvenRangeress]

Originally posted by Gemstone101

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
Sintik I never said she considered me. She TOLD ME YESTERDAY that if someone else called, she WOULD have recommended me, but no she went and chose the person next to me, who has missed more days than me, and who has lower grades then me. So how is that particular person better then me?

I don't know either of you. All I know from here is you break down under pressure. That is a big problem when dealing with children. I also know you you can't deal with criticism, another big problem when dealing with children. Sorry, from what I've seen here, I wouldn't recommend you either..... You can claim you are SO much different in real life then here. However these forums do tell me a little about you. There is no way you deal with criticism in real life when you can't handle it at all here......

People in real life don't push me into the corner and call me a 14 year old slut. And other stupid fake assuming names. If they have something to say thats fine, but don't sit at the other computer saying what you assume I am is what I mean

[ElvenRangeress]

Originally posted by Ravenstorm

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
And I'm not trying to be nominated for anything, the woman promised me the job and then turned her nose away. Thats screwed up.

Somehow, I suspect you heard what you wanted to hear which is not what she said. But even if she lied outright, all I
can say is get over it. She doesn't owe you anything and maybe she just said yes to get you to stop going on and on about it. It happens. Move on.

Raven

I want everyone to hear me out.

I didn't make this post for sympathy, but I wanted advice on how to react to situations such as this one. Not asking why she didn't pick me or whatever, asking on ways to go about that instead of running out upset.

[StrayRogue]

Originally posted by DCSL
Stay, you remind me of a shark. Scent a little blood in the water and you go into a feeding frenzy and rip the bleeding source to shreds.



I am not even trying to be nasty. I am just sick of these self-indulgent, "Hug me" threads Atheana is so fond of. Isn't she meant to be 18? Good God...

[HarmNone]

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
I already told you this, she said ...

"If someone calls, I will make sure you get it." and thats her exact words.

Sorry. I saw that post after I had posted. If she told you you would get the job, and then did not give you the job, she has seen something that she feels is not indicative of someone who would do well in the position. You need to find out what that something is and change it.

Ravenstorm, and the rest of us, have told you things that we see that would make us doubt your ability to do the job correctly, and to be dependable. Perhaps, the teacher has seen these same things, Candi.

I do not know how old you are, but I have a feeling you are very immature for you chronological age (or, at least, your behaviors are). That is going to be a problem to you.

Tell me, from what has been said here, is there anything about yourself you would seek to change? If so, how do you intend to go about making this change?

[StrayRogue]

Originally posted by CrystalTears
Good lord woman, why do you ask advice when you want to argue with everyone about it, saying we don't understand what's going on?

Either you be really specific or let it go and speak to your teacher about how you feel.

As I said, she wanted the ass kissing. She can't take constructive help, or a little knock her defunct personality.

[StrayRogue]

Exactly HarmNone. She isn't hearing what she wants, just like she didn't get what she wanted in class, so she throws a fit, cries and moans about it. Is it me, or is that the mentality of a spoilt child?

[Edited on 25-9-03 by StrayRogue]

[ElvenRangeress]

How about you stop agreeing with everyone Stay and say your own words. You are being nasty regardless of what you think. I need advice on how to go about situations, I don't care why she did or didn't pick me, I just want to know what would have been a better way to go about the whole thing. Just help me there, all I asked from you guys.

[Edited on 9-25-2003 by ElvenRangeress]

[HarmNone]

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
I want everyone to hear me out.

I didn't make this post for sympathy, but I wanted advice on how to react to situations such as this one. Not asking why she didn't pick me or whatever, asking on ways to go about that instead of running out upset.

That is a reasonable request. Here is my suggestion, based on the situation described: Let the teacher know you are disappointed, but do it in a mature, controlled, non-emotional manner. Ask her why you were overlooked for the position. Listen closely to her answer without interrupting or making excuses. Then, ask her what she feels you might do to make yourself more in line with what she is looking for to fill similar positions in future. Listen to the answer and take it to heart. Do not argue, or make excuses, or get emotional during the conversation.

[Adhara]

Candi if you believe you did absolutely nothing wrong, if you believe that she just plain lied to you... what are you exactly expecting of us? Advice on what? There is no police for liars, if she did lie that is.

So what do you want from us?

[ElvenRangeress]

Originally posted by Adhara
Candi if you believe you did absolutely nothing wrong, if you believe that she just plain lied to you... what are you exactly expecting of us? Advice on what? There is no police for liars, if she did lie that is.

So what do you want from us?

I'll copy and paste...



need advice on how to go about situations, I don't care why she did or didn't pick me, I just want to know what would have been a better way to go about the whole thing. Just help me there, all I asked from you guys.

[ElvenRangeress]

instead of getting upset and leaving, what would have been a better way adhara is what i mean

[StrayRogue]

Um, you fool, I was first to post here in reply to you, all of which I keep reiterating.

YOU ARE IMMATURE. Those are my words.

You cannot percieve that there is any perspective other than your own. Listen to these people.

[HarmNone]

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
I don't care why she did or didn't pick me,

There is an error in your judgement here, Candi. The reason why she chose someone else over you is crucially important. If you do not know that, you will not know what you need to change to be chosen the next time something comes up.

[ElvenRangeress]

I'm a fool now. Right. How about if you guys really want to give me advice, you give me advice on what I asked for. Not on how I shouldn't miss school, not on how immature I am.

[StrayRogue]

My advice to you is to GROW UP, act your age, work hard, do your best, don't make excuses and don't slack off. Do the above, and I bet you the person who got the damned job does the above, and you will see a change in peoples reactions to you. Or do you not think its wierd you piss people off so easily?

[StrayRogue]

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
I'm a fool now. Right. How about if you guys really want to give me advice, you give me advice on what I asked for. Not on how I shouldn't miss school, not on how immature I am.


:rolleyes:

[Scott]

Umm, everyone has given you advice.... Don't miss school, Learn to deal with Criticism, and work hard.

[ElvenRangeress]

Stay PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE listen to me for once! I didn't ask all of that, I asked all of you ... for the 100th time!

instead of getting upset and leaving, what would have been a better way to go about this situation!

[HarmNone]

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
Stay PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE listen to me for once! I didn't ask all of that, I asked all of you ... for the 100th time!

instead of getting upset and leaving, what would have been a better way to go about this situation!

Candi! For the love of Pete, have you read my post? I suggested what you should do the next time something like this happens!

[ElvenRangeress]

i read you advice! adhara asked what i wanted from her so i told her!

[StrayRogue]

Everyone has given their advice. As its not what you want to hear, you choose to see it as a knock on yourself. Grow up for the love of God...

[Adhara]

Sorry people post as such lightning speed in here that you had answered my question while I was typing.

[Ravenstorm]

Advice: stop being the type of person who is reacting the way you have for this entire thread.

Advice: read the responses and admit they might have something you need to learn instead of trying to justify yourself.

Advice: realize that you aren't owed anything and that you need to learn how to deal with rejection, criticism, and a host of other things.

Advice: stop responding to people who you think aren't giving you advice and instead converse with those who are. You're just coming off as whiny.

Raven

[Edited on 9-25-2003 by Ravenstorm]

[ElvenRangeress]

Originally posted by StrayRogue
Everyone has given their advice. As its not what you want to hear, you choose to see it as a knock on yourself. Grow up for the love of God...

How many times have you said grown up? Even if you really think I'm immature, saying grow up five times in two hours isn't going to do nothing but tick me off a bit.

[StrayRogue]

Obviously not. Any sane person would actually listen.

[Adhara]

HarmNone told you exactly what to do and that is exactly how I would handle it too. Find some time alone with the teacher, ask why you didn't get it, LISTEN to the answer and try to learn from it.

[ElvenRangeress]

Originally posted by StrayRogue
Obviously not. Any sane person would actually listen.

Yes I'm insane because I was upset and typed fast and didn't spell a few things right. Before you judge Candi, come to florida see me then state your opinion. I'm Atheana to you and thats all you know me as. You don't see my emotions or anything through a message board. Thats that.

[StrayRogue]

I see you as an immature, spoilt brat CANDI. Simple as that.

[ElvenRangeress]

I see you as an ass, and rude snobby person, STAY. Stop being such an ass to me, I'm so sick of it.

[StrayRogue]

Grow up Candi. For your own sake.

[ElvenRangeress]

Don't like my threads, DON'T READ THEM AND REPLY! Simple as that ;o)


Originally posted by StrayRogue
Grow up Candi. For your own sake.

You don't even know Candi. So stop saying my name as if you do.

[Edited on 9-25-2003 by ElvenRangeress]

[StrayRogue]

Oh I do. Getting a cheap laugh out of self-indulgent children is a hobby of mine.

[ElvenRangeress]

No I was hurt from something that happened. Didn't expect sympathy, but didn't expect you to come here and say such hurtful things towards me. Just leave me alone, simple as that.

Giving me advice was nice and all, but you could have been *mature yourself* and leave out the babyish comments, such as your immature! bla bla bla bla bla! Its not mature on your own part.

[Edited on 9-25-2003 by ElvenRangeress]

[StrayRogue]

Hurtful? Everyone has pretty much reitterated what I said. Do you really think the world is a frilly pink place where everyone is nice and gives the job to the girl who cries her eyes out. There are much colder, nastier people out there who will look down on you a whole lot more than me, believe you me.

[ElvenRangeress]

Originally posted by Lady Daina
I can't say it any better than HarmNone.

Approach your teacher. Maybe there was a misunderstanding on her part or yours. Ask her why you were passed over.

One of the hardest things in the world will be to stay calm, do not get defensive (believe me I know, I get defensive easily too).

Really listen to what she says, and even if it hurts, take a long hard look inside yourself and see if maybe you can't see where she's coming from.

You're a very sweet person, Candi. I know how hard it is when people think poorly of you (especially when you feel it is undeserved). It sucks. Noone wants people to dislike them, or think ill of them.

It's SO hard to really examine yourself, including your darker side, and accept it, but only then can you work to change it. I know I *hate* hearing about my faults, but I have (for the most part) learned to accept them and do my best to do better. It's all you can do.

If a situation arises in the future where you feel like running away and crying, try to realize that the person is most likely trying to help you, not hurt you. Yes, they may be poking a sore spot, but not with the intention of hurting you. With the intention of helping you to get rid of it.

I hope this helps a bit.

Best advice yet. Without the rude comments, I'll just come to you for now on. :P

[StrayRogue]

Thank fuck someone penetrated the ego...

[ElvenRangeress]

Originally posted by StrayRogue
Hurtful? Everyone has pretty much reitterated what I said. Do you really think the world is a frilly pink place where everyone is nice and gives the job to the girl who cries her eyes out. There are much colder, nastier people out there who will look down on you a whole lot more than me, believe you me.


You could of left out the other crap you said, and you know that. So just stop while your ahead.

[CrystalTears]

Incredible. No knock on Daina since she gave good advice, but the only difference from what she said over everyone else is that she said you were sweet.

Since your initial post, one of the main things people have been saying is to talk to your teacher and find out her side with a very calm and focused outlook. It's been said over and over and over again, and that is a direct answer to your "what should I have done instead" question. Yet because we were being critical about other aspects in your post doesn't mean it was being ignored.

Need I remind you what you named your thread? "Advice On Evil Teachers!" Meaning she was evil because she didn't deliver the job to you? The job that now you don't care that you didn't get?! Gah! <flails>

I suppose I don't understand how you can ask for advice about how to react in the future and then say that you don't care why you didn't get it in the same breath, since that was the reason you were upset in the first place. If you don't care why you weren't chosen, what reaction exactly should you have other than "oh well, better luck next time"? A person who doesn't care why they weren't chosen wouldn't have gotten upset, wouldn't have been offended, wouldn't have cried.. they would just shrugged and walked away.

So much for trying to help you with your future in general. People were honestly trying to help and because you didn't get the exact answer you wanted, it was as though you didn't get any advice at all. Is this how the teacher/student conference went as well?

I tried, I really tried to be nice but you make it so hard sometimes to help you. It's incredibly frustrating.

[Edited on 9/25/2003 by CrystalTears]

[HarmNone]

Heh. I hear ya, CrystalTears. However, if the message got through, I am pleased. How it got through is not all that important to me.

I did, however, have one more question to ask, but had to go take two Excedrin before my head exploded and made a mess on my monitor. ;)

Candi, you say you behave differently in "real-life" than you do here on these boards. I would really like to know why you do that. It is a mystery the solving of which would bring me great peace. :)

HarmNone needs peace

[StrayRogue]

Ditto CT.

[CrystalTears]

The way I post is differently than how I am in real life. I'm actually a bitch.

<pauses>

Oh wait I post like a bitch too! Heh, my bad. :P

[Adhara]

I'd like to give Grays/D a big golden star for not posting once in this thread!!

Way to go buddy!

[StrayRogue]

Originally posted by CrystalTears
The way I post is differently than how I am in real life. I'm actually a bitch.

<pauses>

Oh wait I post like a bitch too! Heh, my bad. :P

Thats what gets me hot baby :flamed:

[CrystalTears]

Someone gag Adhara. :D

[HarmNone]

Originally posted by CrystalTears
The way I post is differently than how I am in real life. I'm actually a bitch.

<pauses>

Oh wait I post like a bitch too! Heh, my bad. :P

You are not a bitch! You are simply outspoken. Yes, that is it...outspoken is what you are! :D

HarmNone likes outspoken

[Adhara]

P.S. It was not a taunting maneuver but a genuine appreciative comment so please please Grays do not post!

[CrystalTears]

Outspoken is HarmNonese for bitch. I get it!

[Soulpieced]

Cry for help anyone?

[Bobmuhthol]

Yes, please. Hold the cry.

[HarmNone]

Originally posted by Soulpieced
Cry for help anyone?

Yes! Haaaaalp! :D

HarmNone needs help

[Soulpieced]

I just think Atheana's childishness and overall apparent lack of an open mind is one of the reasons she ends up being flamed in nearly every thread she posts in. Just a random observation.

[HarmNone]

Originally posted by Soulpieced
I just think Atheana's childishness and overall apparent lack of an open mind is one of the reasons she ends up being flamed in nearly every thread she posts in. Just a random observation.

Ya know, I think that is one of the points that all of us were trying to make. Immaturity is not a crime, but it is surely a problem. With work it can be corrected. Why would someone not want to do that before they have to go out in the big, bad world and get eaten by the REAL sharks?

HarmNone does not understand

[StrayRogue]

That was the point I was definately trying to make. Trust me, this rogue can be a proper bastard when he wants to be.

[CrystalTears]

Childish and immature people have no business being child caretakers, ergo why we were striving to help, since that IS what she wants to do full time some day.

It would be as they say, "the blind leading the blind".

[StrayRogue]

They understand, they understand!!!!! *falls to his knee's, reaches to the skies and weeps*

[HarmNone]

Originally posted by StrayRogue
That was the point I was definately trying to make. Trust me, this rogue can be a proper bastard when he wants to be.

Bastards are inherently improper! :lol:

HarmNone knows some bastards and they ain't proper

[HarmNone]

Originally posted by StrayRogue
They understand, they understand!!!!! *falls to his knee's, reaches to the skies and weeps*

Hmmph! Give up the bad guy act, bloke. You are obviously a big ol' softy!:P

HarmNone knows a marshmallow when she sees one ;)

[CrystalTears]

StrayRogue is a peep?!

[StrayRogue]

Damn you all!

[HarmNone]

Hell, yes, he is a peep! He literally SCREAMS peep! :lol:

HarmNone likes peeps, too

[StrayRogue]

STFU *blushes*

[HarmNone]

Awww, look. He turns colours. Is that not adorable? :)

HarmNone is just warming up, rogue :P

[StrayRogue]

Ok, ok, change of pace...How you doin? *suggestive raise of eyebrow*

[Ravenstorm]

Define 'peep'.

Raven

[HarmNone]

Peep=little chicken-shaped marshmallow, oh great Raven. They are very sweet and adorably cute, and quite plentiful at Easter. :D

HarmNone on peeps

[Hips]

Hmmm, is he a pink one, white one, yellow one...? I've seen purple bunny ones too... :P

[Bestatte]

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
Stay PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE listen to me for once! I didn't ask all of that, I asked all of you ... for the 100th time!

instead of getting upset and leaving, what would have been a better way to go about this situation!

A better way to go about this situation is to not get upset, and stay.

Happy now? That's your answer. Don't get upset, and stay. And talk to the teacher, find out WHY, because why IS important. If you can't understand that the "why" of things is important, then you are not ready to be an adult.

If you are not ready to be an adult, then it really doesn't matter if you get upset and leave, because you're not ready to handle being an adult anyway.

So go ahead and have your temper tantrum and get frustrated, but don't expect people to say "aww poor poopie," because we're talking about someone who is expecting to take responsibility for children. And you have shown through your incessant whining that you are a child yourself, and have no business caring for them anyway.

Now go run along home and do your homework, and get off the computer.

[StrayRogue]

No fecking way! I am NOT one of them! *spanks ass*

[StrayRogue]

BASTARDS!

[HarmNone]

Originally posted by StrayRogue
No fecking way! I am NOT one of them! *spanks ass*

::HarmNone bats her long lashes at the pink marshmallow rogue::

M'lord, I do believe thou wouldst protest too much. Oh, and I am afraid you have left a permanent pushed-in place in your little, squishy hiney. :lol:

HarmNone on wounded peep butts

[Ravenstorm]

Originally posted by HarmNone
Peep=little chicken-shaped marshmallow, oh great Raven. They are very sweet and adorably cute, and quite plentiful at Easter. :D

HarmNone on peeps


Oh, those things. I like to bite their heads off.

Raven

[StrayRogue]

*cries* You guys are mean.

[Halfsilver]

so..o...difficult...must.....not....post....


grrrrays/d

[Back]

ElvenRangeress,

I hated school with a passion. I never went. In fact, I missed over half my 12th grade year. I did get my diploma in night school though. So easy! If I were smarter, I would have just taken the GED I think its called. Since then, I've been working. At this point in time my marketability is pretty high. With unemployment at its peak, I've been working steadily as a freelancer earning, what I would call, decent money.

I heard L.L. Cool J. once say something to the effect of... "Never let ANYONE tell you you can't do something." Word to live by in my opinion.

[ElvenRangeress]

No I listened to Daina because she doesn't start her sentences with, I don't mean to hurt you but.... or, grow up! She gives it to me straight. No hiding behind insults, and I respect her for that. Sorry she got to me and you didn't, give up on me then, and leave my thread.

(Maybe if you guys wouldn't *treat me as if I'm a five year old, I could understand you, a little pat on the hand with a few insults doesn't get to me, telling me whats really going on actually does. If you want to give advice, at least be a little bit nicer about it, saying stuff such as ...


hey fucking grow up, and then adding, you need to have proper grammar!

is not advice, its insulting, and degrading. And thats mature? Well than, I am proud to be immature in your eyes.*)

[Edited on 9-26-2003 by ElvenRangeress]

[DCSL]

Originally posted by StrayRogue
*cries* You guys are mean.

The next time I see Stay in game, I'm going to have my character, no matter which one it is, say something about his peepishness. I don't care about it not being IC, it's just too too fitting to care. :moon:

[ElvenRangeress]

Originally posted by Bestatte

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
Stay PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE listen to me for once! I didn't ask all of that, I asked all of you ... for the 100th time!

instead of getting upset and leaving, what would have been a better way to go about this situation!

A better way to go about this situation is to not get upset, and stay.

Happy now? That's your answer. Don't get upset, and stay. And talk to the teacher, find out WHY, because why IS important. If you can't understand that the "why" of things is important, then you are not ready to be an adult.

If you are not ready to be an adult, then it really doesn't matter if you get upset and leave, because you're not ready to handle being an adult anyway.

So go ahead and have your temper tantrum and get frustrated, but don't expect people to say "aww poor poopie," because we're talking about someone who is expecting to take responsibility for children. And you have shown through your incessant whining that you are a child yourself, and have no business caring for them anyway.

Now go run along home and do your homework, and get off the computer.


My point exactly. Belittling me. :rolleyes:

[StrayRogue]

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
No I listened to Daina because she doesn't start her sentences with, I don't mean to hurt you but.... or, grow up! She gives it to me straight. No hiding behind insults, and I respect her for that. Sorry she got to me and you didn't, give up on me then, and leave my thread.

(Maybe if you guys wouldn't *treat me as if I'm a five year old, I could understand you, a little pat on the hand with a few insults doesn't get to me, telling me whats really going on actually does. If you want to give advice, at least be a little bit nicer about it, saying stuff such as ...


hey fucking grow up, and then adding, you need to have proper grammar!

is not advice, its insulting, and degrading. And thats mature? Well than, I am proud to be immature in your eyes.*)

[Edited on 9-26-2003 by ElvenRangeress]


Stop acting like a five year old, and we'll treat you like you are mature.

[Suppa Hobbit Mage]

This is by the most enlightening (about Atheana's maturity) and entertaining thread I've read in ages. Do go on.

Oh yes, advice.

The "real world", where you use punctuation, gramar and proper sentence structure (per one of your rambling posts), will eat you alive if you behave in the fashion you have here. No employer, instructor or trainer, wants to have a high maintenance temper trantrum child in front of them demanding something.

I'd recommend you read through YOUR posts, and try to discern why they are so acerbic to us, the readers. Try to read them without emotion, just read them for what they are.

B

[Ylena]

I've been meditating on your use of the phrase "in the real world."

Are you implying that the people that read your posts are not, in fact, living in the real world? This BB doesn't exist as a fantasy in your mind. It's read by real people, with real feelings.

These boards are read by real people, who live in real life, with real problems. Granted, it's a lot easier to be snarky from the comfort of your anonymous keyboard.. but since this medium is nothing but the projection of your use of words... WHY on earth would you not be MORE careful here about your use of grammar and punctuation? It's much more revealing of your inner self than a bouncing boob anime avatar.

I read this entire thread all at once. I, too, tend to get defensive and hostile when presented with criticism... but I'm dismayed how hostile you were to people who were offering you good advice, with good intentions - and the only person you could actually open up to listen to is the person who gave you the same advice in a sugar-coated pill.

Take it from me. You are going to be judged for your entire life on how you present yourself. You're going to be judged for your entire life on your appearance and demeanor. There's only so much you can do about your appearance. The good news is, you can ALWAYS change your demeanor.

Elizabeth
(observing)

[CrystalTears]

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
No I listened to Daina because she doesn't start her sentences with, I don't mean to hurt you but.... or, grow up! She gives it to me straight. No hiding behind insults, and I respect her for that. Sorry she got to me and you didn't, give up on me then, and leave my thread.

(Maybe if you guys wouldn't *treat me as if I'm a five year old, I could understand you, a little pat on the hand with a few insults doesn't get to me, telling me whats really going on actually does. If you want to give advice, at least be a little bit nicer about it, saying stuff such as ...


hey fucking grow up, and then adding, you need to have proper grammar!

is not advice, its insulting, and degrading. And thats mature? Well than, I am proud to be immature in your eyes.*)

[Edited on 9-26-2003 by ElvenRangeress]

The only one who had posted who had any sort of bitter sarcasm was StrayRogue (sorry), and yet for some reason you believed that we all spoke to you that way. Everyone else tried very hard to give you very supportive, very honest, noninsulting advice. Yet you chose to ignore over 6 pages of postings (one of them was silly drivel, which actually was more fun than the acidic responses I got from you) and be defensive and pick and choose what fit your needs instead of realizing it was ALL for your well-being.

You started this thread but it belongs to the members, not just you, so we're all allowed to say whatever we like, so stop with the lunatic ramblings of "leave my thread". You asked for advice, we gave it to you, you didn't like it, you got defensive and hostile, and we got tired of it.

Criticism is very hard to take from others, I understand that. However if you would have just said "thank you for your advice, it was really appreciated" (which you failed to do) and not marched in with daggers the way you did, this would have ended very nicely. Again you displayed to us fake people (we're not the real world, guys, sorry) that you can't handle critique. Guess what. That's all children do, all day long, 24/7. They're going to call you fat, ugly, stupid, mean, bossy, EVIL and all the other adjectives we attached to the teachers we didn't like. You need to build up your defenses and tougher skin to put up with it. And if you can't take it from people behind their monitors, you certainly won't be able to from in-your-face kiddies.

<exhales> I feel better. Good luck with school.

[HarmNone]

I must agree with CrystalTears. Never once did she, or Adhara, or Ravenstorm, or I, or any other poster actually come out and insult you. Stray may be a bit in-your-face with his posting style, but what he was trying to get across to you was accurate and meant to be helpful to you. You asked for advice, you got it, you got angry because the responses were not what you wished them to be.

Personally, I am accustomed to working with adults. So are the other people posting here. I do not insult, but I do not sugar-coat either, and I am not about to start now. That kind of horse hockey just does not work in an adult environment. Most adults want the truth when they ask for advice. They do not want to be patted on the tushy.

I am assuming you will graduate from highschool this coming spring. If you want to be a teacher, college must follow highschool. With the attitude you show here, the college crowd will eat you alive. You had best get prepared.

HarmNone dishing out truths

[AnticorRifling]

I just started reading this thread. I didn't read all 7 pages. I don't care if it's been said before but I'll say it now in my own way.

The way you present yourself reflects a great deal when others decide what "breaks" they will and will not send your way. Right now I wouldn't even think of giving you a job as a babysitter or anything else that requires someone being dependable. School is your current job, you're missing alot of days. I don't care the excuse or reason that reflects poorly on your behalf.

Also you're talking about teaching yet you are an emotion driven person to the extreme. You can't let emotion cloud your professionalism, your ability to convey a point, or in that aspect allow it to do anything that will make you lose face and or credibility to the children.

Calm down before you post, speak, or do anything that will be used to judge you. It's dificult, hell even I fly off the handle once in a great while (I've done it once on the boards and from occasion in real life) but I do it behind closed doors so that those troops that I lead don't see my weakness. You can use this n your own life it just takes practice.

I would approach the situation like this:

Do not make a scene, don't bring it up in front of a class/group. Talk to this teacher one on one. Explain that even though you do miss class, for a reason valid or no, you are dependable. You have past experience with children, it's a passion as well as a professional pursuit and this opportunity would be a good chance for you to not only gain experience but also to provide a service that you are good at.

Learn to use tact, flattery, civility, and BS to your advantage.

I'm a master at all of these and I think very fast on my feet. If you need me to talk to someone let me know. I have a good knack at sensing people and presenting my(your) side in a manner that they will understand and or agree with.

<----------- Rocks.

[Tsa`ah]

I am not reading 7 pages of this. I refuse.

Peeps - Nuke em till they pop.

Atheana -


I've read several posts pointing out why the instructor could have passed you over, and after page 2, I think pretty much all has been said.

You were passed over for a job. For whatever reason, you were passed over. It could have been due to your attendance, it could have been due to how you present yourself, it could have been maturity, it could have been anything.

I noticed a few things in your posts. The primary event I've noticed in almost every one of them has been minimizing the blame upon yourself. You will go no where in life if you believe it is everyone but yourself. No where at all. The second is the remark about the teachers not really teaching. Lack of respect and belittling a superior is a fast way to get no-where. I have a line, a line of 45 applicants vying for a position on my team. In my night of interviews only 2 out of 15 made it to the "possible" category. The other 13 were rejected due to respect issues.

I could go into a myriad of other things right now, but I'm going to lay this down simply.

Your instructor, from what I comprehend, acts also as a job service. By that I mean she takes calls and hands out assignments. She assigns students as caregivers to children. What do you think her first priority should be? The children she is assigning care for.

As a father of two, I can honestly say I would turn you away from my doorstep without a second thought. I admit that is solely due to how you present yourself on the boards. You could act in an opposite manner everywhere else, but I would assume that is not the case no matter how much you want to believe it.

Outside of family, no one is trusted with the care of my children unless they can provide proof of education, satisfactory state certification and a spotless police record. There are more criteria, but I'm sure you get the point.

You show little maturity and I'll bet my last dollar that is why you were passed up for the job.

[ElvenRangeress]

I do not think anyone here is *not real*. How I act at school, home, or whatever else I do is very different from here. I don't have people assuming I'm this that or the other, they see me for who I am and how I act. They *see* me, and can observe how I act. I write correctly at school because it is required. Maturity should never be based on how one writes/types when it isn't really expected.

You can't see who I am, and see emotion I may have when typing here. Capital letters do not show emotion and could mean anything coming from me. It might mean sad to one person and annoying to another. So yeah, it's very hard to express myself here. That is all I am implying when I say "real life".

That said, let me introduce myself -

I am Candi, and I live in Ft.Lauderdale, Fl. I am moving up north this summer by Jessa and Greg (Whirlin and Michiko) and attending college by them with Darren (Graysalin).

I want nothing more than to be able to work with children. Considering the fact I have baby-sat since I was 12, have taken two years of Early Child Care, and counseling for children and have worked as a tutor in several elementary schools here in South Florida, I think that I would make a good candidate for such a job. I am a very loving and caring person.

I've been through alot, and I thank God for where I am. I have a mother to admire, and a boyfriend to die for. I have a caring family who loves me, and whom I love with every bit of my heart. God is my guide in life. On my free time I enjoy reading, watching tv, going online, building webpages, swimming, working out, hanging out with my friends, and much more. My overall GPA in school is a 3.7-3.9 (only got a 4.0 twice, but still proud of it!). And thats about all I can think of for now. Nice to meet you. And you are .... ? (waits for a reply)

PS. I would like to thank those of you who offered constructive criticism and not blatent sarcasm.

[StrayRogue]

Pass me the head banging wall please? Thx.

[AnticorRifling]

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
........They *see* me, and can observe how I act. I write correctly at school because it is required. Maturity should never be based on how one writes/types when it isn't really expected.

You can't see who I am, and see emotion I may have when typing here. Capital letters do not show emotion and could mean anything coming from me. It might mean sad to one person and annoying to another. So yeah, it's very hard to express myself here. That is all I am implying when I say "real life".


You are not in character here so the only way we can base opinions on you is how you present your ideas. If you only write and type and act mature/properly when it's REQUIRED then you are putting up a front. What you do when no one is watching and or enforcing is the definition of your character (I'm talking the personality trait here not a GS char)

This is why you were met with the hostility. We don't have anything else to base our thoughts of you on. People gave you honest opinions based upon what they have read here. And I for one must say that if I don't have anything else to use as a basis for character I would find you to immature to watch children based on your posts. Then again I also realize there is more to someone then posts on a message board that is why you got the last post from me. I'm not one to jump to quick conclusions, I'm slow and methodical.

Don't get mad at the other people of the board that filled this thread with 7 pages, they were posting opinions based on the information at hand.

[Tendarian]

After reading all 7 pages i think Daina and Harmnone's advice would be good to follow but i also have one question. What kind of personal problems is a teacher sharing with you? That seems a bit weird to me.

[CrystalTears]

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
I do not think anyone here is *not real*. How I act at school, home, or whatever else I do is very different from here. I don't have people assuming I'm this that or the other, they see me for who I am and how I act. They *see* me, and can observe how I act. I write correctly at school because it is required. Maturity should never be based on how one writes/types when it isn't really expected.


Good luck when you apply for jobs where they require a resume and introduction letter, which is essentially the first impression an employer gets from you. They judge you based on how articulate and well-written you are, long before they even consider "seeing" you. So yes, how you write means everything, especially one who wants to be a teacher.

You really need to stop believing that no one can pass judgements based on any and all interactions other than eye-to-eye contact.

Oh and also when on an interview and the interviewer says, "We'll keep in touch so I'll be calling you soon." This does not mean he's promising you a job, it's merely a thoughtful consideration. Just telling you now so that you don't start crying when you don't get a call and claim that you were "promised" the position.

[Halfsilver]

Don't hate me for posting...but can I offer a suggestion?

I think what Atheana meant was... She didn't think that it was expected or necessary to be grammatically perfect on the boards and that she was just typing casually and so being, her personal character shouldn't be judged on this aspect.

I'm sure on a resume or app, she would be very meticulous when writing or typing.

-grays/d (don't get mad...my guns are holstered...just a suggestion on what she meant) :grin:

[Edited on 9-26-2003 by Halfsilver]

[CrystalTears]

I understand that, but that's exactly what people are pointing out.

As a future teacher, grammar and spelling are mandatory elements to have. To shrug it off for ANY reason, no matter how trivial it may seem to the writer, doesn't make it any less important.

In fact on a message boards, if you want to be taken seriously, you type in a serious fashion since that's the only impression the posters will ever have of you. No one will fly out to meet posters face to face to have a complete view of the person. They're only going to go on what they know. If all we know is that she types carelessly and gets defensive at the drop of the hat, how are we supposed to know how she behaves beyond the screen? That is where she'll have to prove herself otherwise.

[ElvenRangeress]

And ever sense I was *corrected* on grammar ect here, I have been typing proper. So whats with all the fuss?

[Edited on 9-26-2003 by ElvenRangeress]

[ElvenRangeress]

Originally posted by CrystalTears

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
I do not think anyone here is *not real*. How I act at school, home, or whatever else I do is very different from here. I don't have people assuming I'm this that or the other, they see me for who I am and how I act. They *see* me, and can observe how I act. I write correctly at school because it is required. Maturity should never be based on how one writes/types when it isn't really expected.


Good luck when you apply for jobs where they require a resume and introduction letter, which is essentially the first impression an employer gets from you. They judge you based on how articulate and well-written you are, long before they even consider "seeing" you. So yes, how you write means everything, especially one who wants to be a teacher.

You really need to stop believing that no one can pass judgements based on any and all interactions other than eye-to-eye contact.

Oh and also when on an interview and the interviewer says, "We'll keep in touch so I'll be calling you soon." This does not mean he's promising you a job, it's merely a thoughtful consideration. Just telling you now so that you don't start crying when you don't get a call and claim that you were "promised" the position.


And I don't think that when I apply for a job, they will come to players corner and see me using improper grammar.

[Drew2]

Anyone keeping a tally of threads about Atheana?

I wish PC had a squelch feature.

[CrystalTears]

Damnit I'm doing it again. I'll never learn that you can't teach bricks to stand.

I'll have to go back to my previous statements of "You're right Atheana, you're already right." Just do me a favor and don't come here asking for advice and then shoot it down when people are trying to helpful. At this point I'd rather adopt Warclaidm and teach him to roleplay.

[Bestatte]

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
And ever sense I was *corrected* on grammar ect here, I have been typing proper. So whats with all the fuss?

[Edited on 9-26-2003 by ElvenRangeress]

Hehehe - you walked right into this one, so don't blame me for it. The word is "since," not "sense." It's "etc," not "ect." And you have been typing properLY, not proper.

If you don't know an adjective from an adverb, then you shouldn't be teaching anyone anything, and I applaud your teacher for turning you down.

[ElvenRangeress]

Well then I thank you for correcting me, but you know you could of left out the rest of the BS about me teaching. Thats what I want to do, and you really have no say in what I should and should not be able to do.

(And I know its since, was a mistake. But never knew that ect was etc but its not really important if I mix the t and c up. :rolleyes:

[Edited on 9-26-2003 by ElvenRangeress]

[Weedmage Princess]

Originally posted by StrayRogue
Pass me the head banging wall please? Thx.

http://hometown.aol.com/fungimagi/images/banghead.gif

And Atheana, Candi, whichever you prefer to be addressed as...I wish you all the best in whatever you do in life. And that's sincere.

[smarty pants]

OriginallyWell then I thank you for correcting me, but you know you could of left out the rest of the BS about me teaching. Thats what I want to do, and you really have no say in what I should and should not be able to do.

(And I know its since, was a mistake. But never knew that ect was etc but its not really important if I mix the t and c up. :rolleyes: posted by ElvenRangeress


[Edited on 9-26-2003 by ElvenRangeress]

WHICH SHOULD SAY:

Well then, I thank you for correcting me, but you know, you could have left out the rest of the BS about me teaching. That's what I want to do, and you really have no say in what I should and should not be able to do.

(And I know it's "since" - it was a mistake. I never knew that "ect" was "etc", but it's not really important if I mix the "t" and "c" up. :rolleyes:)

even when you're typing what you call "proper", you have tons of grammatical errors.

[Edited on 9-26-2003 by smarty pants]

[Adhara]

shouldn't it be "you could have left out" instead of "you could of left out"?

Just wondering. I still have trouble with some english expressions.

[smarty pants]

Originally posted by Adhara
shouldn't it be "you could have left out" instead of "you could of left out"?

Just wondering. I still have trouble with some english expressions.
yeah, it's probably "you could have".

[ElvenRangeress]

Good job guys, keep going and correcting the rest of my mistakes! When you could have been using this time doing something for yourselves.

[ElvenRangeress]

And what I meant by *the properly part* was where I introduced myself. Go pick at that a bit.

[StrayRogue]

You aspire to teach our kids. Personally, I'd want someone whose actually qualified for the job. You clearly aren't.

[ElvenRangeress]

Yep! You are right! Because I made mistakes on a message board, I am 100 percent not fit to teach school. Damn, you seriously got me there.

[CrystalTears]

Change your profession to body builder and we'll stop. :D ::ducks and runs away::

[ElvenRangeress]

Yeah, I'm going to change my profession for a bunch of hypocrites.

[Edited on 9-26-2003 by ElvenRangeress]

[StrayRogue]

You DON"T GET IT DO YOU? You don't read. What you write here reflects on you Atheana. If you are lazy here, whose to say you are NOT lazy elsewhere. I do not care if you are Elvis in reality, my impression of you is of someone who is NOT able to look after herself, let alone educate children. The consensus among EVERYONE else here seems to be the same.

[StrayRogue]

LOL, you are a fucking idiot.

[CrystalTears]

:lol:

Geez lighten up it was a joke. See the big grin? The ducking and running? Inserted to imply a joke.

You know we weren't the ones who came here with our tale of woe asking for help and then flaming everyone for their opinion. <shrugs>

[AnticorRifling]

See Anticor's posts.

[ElvenRangeress]

I type like an ass here, and I admit it! But just because I'm a *whatever* to you, doesn't mean I'm not fit to work with children. And who the hell do you think you are to, any of you, to say I'm not fit for this? YOU DO NOT KNOW ME, YOU KNOW ME AS A DEFENSIVE WHINY BITCH BECAUSE THAT IS ALL YOU GUYS GIVE ME A CHANCE TO BE! I CAN'T BE MATURE, OR ANYTHING HERE BECAUSE NO MATTER WHAT I SAY ITS AS IF YOU HAVE A CRUEL COMMENT ON EVERYTHING I SAY!

[Soulpieced]

I CAN'T BE MATURE

.

Yes

[ElvenRangeress]

Originally posted by StrayRogue
LOL, you are a fucking idiot.

LOL, you are a fucking lifeless bastard who needs to stop picking at every word I say and go on with his own life. :flamed:

[Weedmage Princess]

Okay I'm gonna bite.

How are they hypocritical for saying they don't feel you should be a teacher? Had they said at one time they felt you'd be a good teacher, then all of a sudden changed their tune and said you'd be an awful teacher..then yes, I could see you calling them hypocrites. However, I don't recall anyone here ever saying you'd make a good teacher.

I'm just wondering if somehow I no longer know what hypocritical means.

[ElvenRangeress]

Not really talking about their actions on this thread, check out the other ones.

[Edaarin]

It might be just me but I think I just read 9 pages of the same thing.

[ElvenRangeress]

I agree.

[Skirmisher]

I hope you are able to absorb even a little of what everyone is telling you in the thread regarding Evil Teachers.

It is actually all excellent advice.

No one is out to "get" you, and your teacher is not "evil".

You seem like someone who would be a nice if incredibly immature young woman to meet in person. I will give a few words of my own advice for you to take or to discard as you will.

1)Don't get caught in the trap of thinking something is unfair. The world IS unfair, for everyone, the sooner you accept that the sooner it will cause you less pain. The only really dangerous thing is when someone thinks it is only unfair to them.

The real world after school is not about "fair" or "nice". It's about results and people rely on certain criteria to make decisions to acheive those results. Your teachers may use criteria that you were totally unaware of, for example as people in earlier posts noted, someone who works their butt off even if they acheive slightly less than yourself and excused absences are still absences. To a parent needing someone to care for a child so they can work, an excused absence of their childcare worker does not help them.

2) Accept criticism graciously.
You seem to be one of those people who need to respond to every criticism with a retort explaining how that person is wrong nearly instantly without even taking the time to examine WHY they would make such a criticism.

That won't help you, but only hurt you.

Even if you hate the criticism, say alright I'll have to consider that.

Isn't it simple? You do not agree with anything that was said right out, but you also don't come off as a child going "No I didn't!" to every accusation.

3) An extremely important thing is to actually DO go back and think about what the criticism is addressing. If you don't seriously contemplate their points, you will not have a valid reason to either discard them as incorrect, or sometimes to acknowledge the truth in them and try to make adjustments.

4)Lastly, but also extremely important, try to always take the time to see how things could appear to the person opposite yourself. If you do that you give yourself more chances to fix any chinks in your armor and make your presentation of yourself all the more impressive. Understanding why people do or say things is powerful as it allows you to plan rather than simply react.

[CrystalTears]

Thanks! I'm glad I'm not the only one who noticed that. I wanted to respond but I think I wrote and backspaced a reply about ten times. I was left speechless again. (In response to Weedmage since the posts are put in faster than I can keep up with.)

[Edited on 9/26/2003 by CrystalTears]

[ElvenRangeress]

Originally posted by Skirmisher
I hope you are able to absorb even a little of what everyone is telling you in the thread regarding Evil Teachers.

It is actually all excellent advice.

No one is out to "get" you, and your teacher is not "evil".

You seem like someone who would be a nice if incredibly immature young woman to meet in person. I will give a few words of my own advice for you to take or to discard as you will.

1)Don't get caught in the trap of thinking something is unfair. The world IS unfair, for everyone, the sooner you accept that the sooner it will cause you less pain. The only really dangerous thing is when someone thinks it is only unfair to them.

The real world after school is not about "fair" or "nice". It's about results and people rely on certain criteria to make decisions to acheive those results. Your teachers may use criteria that you were totally unaware of, for example as people in earlier posts noted, someone who works their butt off even if they acheive slightly less than yourself and excused absences are still absences. To a parent needing someone to care for a child so they can work, an excused absence of their childcare worker does not help them.

2) Accept criticism graciously.
You seem to be one of those people who need to respond to every criticism with a retort explaining how that person is wrong nearly instantly without even taking the time to examine WHY they would make such a criticism.

That won't help you, but only hurt you.

Even if you hate the criticism, say alright I'll have to consider that.

Isn't it simple? You do not agree with anything that was said right out, but you also don't come off as a child going "No I didn't!" to every accusation.

3) An extremely important thing is to actually DO go back and think about what the criticism is addressing. If you don't seriously contemplate their points, you will not have a valid reason to either discard them as incorrect, or sometimes to acknowledge the truth in them and try to make adjustments.

4)Lastly, but also extremely important, try to always take the time to see how things could appear to the person opposite yourself. If you do that you give yourself more chances to fix any chinks in your armor and make your presentation of yourself all the more impressive. Understanding why people do or say things is powerful as it allows you to plan rather than simply react.

I have actually thought all of this through, and all the advice helped me. But the reason I keep responding is because people are saying things such as:

WE GAVE YOU ADVICE WE ALREADY GAVE YOU IT BLA BLA BLA BLA BLA

But where they are forgetting is that ... they didn't just give me advice, which I appreciated at first ... then when I was almost done reading it and feel like its helping they end it with ... GROW UP, or other silly things like that. Thats my only problem at this moment.

[Scott]

"Grow up" is great advice sometimes.

[Artha]

211 replies in an hour and a half? Jesus.

[ElvenRangeress]

Well of course it is, but I would of accepted that as advice if the person saying it hasn't said it like 500 times already in rude ways ...

Your a 14 year old slut and needs to grow up, and other crap like that.

Gets old quickly.

[CrystalTears]

I hate to break this to you, but that didn't start getting said until you started fighting with people about their responses. You didn't start taking any advice graciously until someone called you sweet and nice. I'm sorry if the rest of us aren't sugar-coating our answers, but that's the way it goes.

And for the love of all that is good and holy, for someone who wants people to see past the threads that have occured in the past, YOU are the one who keeps bringing up the 14 year old slut comment that never has been said here, let alone anywhere since that thread was closed months ago! Good grief, talk about not letting anything go, and we're the hypocrites?! Goddamnit.

[Edited on 9/26/2003 by CrystalTears]

[StrayRogue]

Grow up, you idiot. I pray, I actually pray to fucking God (which I do not believe in), that you are NEVER, EVER, in a job of responsibility, especially over children.

You are not mature enough, you are not educated enough. You are pig-headed, ignorant and lazy. If I was a father, and had you as my child's a fucking teacher, I would be ashamed, and outraged. I feel MTV would be a better damn education for my wayward offspring.

I hope that any future employer see's this too. As someone said, you are going to get eaten alive at College.

[Edited on 26-9-03 by StrayRogue]

[Skirmisher]

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
Well of course it is, but I would of accepted that as advice if the person saying it hasn't said it like 500 times already in rude ways ...

Your a 14 year old slut and needs to grow up, and other crap like that.

Gets old quickly.

While someone in another thread may have said something to that effect, the only one here that has used that word or implication in regards to you, is you.

And there was a total of SIX minutes between when I posted about processing and thinking about constructive criticism and your reply.

Thats not alot of thought.

[StrayRogue]

I didn't say you were a 14 year old slut, in this thread. You DO act like a 14 year old Atheana. That much is clear.

There is a reason why the teacher didn't pick you, understand? It was anything malicious. She simply realized, as everyone else here has, that you are INCAPABLE. You can't even see the fact that how you act, be it through spelling, grammar, acting your fucking age, shows your mentality.

[ElvenRangeress]

StrayRogue how about you show us your mature side, then you can come back and tell me what I am and what you think of me. Because right now, you seem like a bored child yourself who needs to fix a few problems in his own life first.

[StrayRogue]

Such as what Atheana? What do I need to fix beyond my growing anger at some dumb idiot who seems to think the sun shines out her ass?

[ElvenRangeress]

Originally posted by StrayRogue
Such as what Atheana? What do I need to fix beyond my growing anger at some dumb idiot who seems to think the sun shines out her ass?

My point. You are actually getting angry at me. You shouldn't let the computer and people on it get to you like this. If I'm so horrible, why don't you ignore me and pretend I don't exsist, like you do God?

[CrystalTears]

Well he's not the one who came here seeking advice about why his evil teacher didn't give him the job he was promised.

Yeah I know, I'm egging it on, I'm sorry! I can't help myself! Someone tranquilize me!

[ElvenRangeress]

But CT thats the damn point. I never FUCKING came here and asked WHY THE HELL SHE DIDN'T GIVE ME THE JOB! I asked what would have been a better way for me to react when she DIDN'T GIVE ME IT. Not ONCE DID I ASK WHY SHE DIDN'T GIVE ME IT, GIVE ME THE ADVICE I ASKED FOR, NOT GIVING ME ADVICE I DIDN'T ASK FOR AND GETTING UPSET BECAUSE I DON'T GET WHAT THE HELL YOUR TALKING ABOUT. Simple as that.

[StrayRogue]

We gave you advice. You didn't listen. You fucking mo mo. Please go to Church, sing in the choir, clap your retarded hands and pray to God you get a job as a teacher, as I severely doubt you have a chance in Hell.

[Bobmuhthol]

<<I never FUCKING came here and asked WHY THE HELL SHE DIDN'T GIVE ME THE JOB!>>

I've read that sentence out loud multiple times. You can't stress fucking and nothing else. Learn English.

Kthx.

[Suppa Hobbit Mage]

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
Yep! You are right! Because I made mistakes on a message board, I am 100 percent not fit to teach school. Damn, you seriously got me there.

At least we agree on something.

[CrystalTears]

Mind if you stop SCREAMING at me when you reply like AN INFANT THAT DIDN'T GET HER DAMNED COOKIE?! Thanks.

You got feedback about how to react when Adhara and HarmNone said to you to talk to your teacher. You said you spoke to her and still can't understand why you were lied to when she promised you the job, thus ensuing the advice of why you didn't get that either, which then led to you saying that you didn't care why you didn't get the job in the first place. So color me and the rest of the crew confused as to what to give you advice on since even you aren't sure anymore. Get off the ferris wheel when you talk cause you're making me dizzingly sick.

[ElvenRangeress]

Then don't post here, make me feel like an ass and horrible when I only asked for advice and help. I'm sick of you guys being so cold hearted to me, helping me is one thing, adding the shit is another. I have a right to get upset just like the rest of you, but its not okay if I do it seems.

[Ravenstorm]

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
Lots and lots of posts saying 'it's all your fault'.


Little girl, let me inform you of something in the nicest possible way that I am capable of right now. No matter what the provocation, the only one who is responsible for your actions is you. I don't give a flying fuck if every single reply insults you. You choose how to respond. It is not the fault of anyone but you. And just in case you decide to tell us all how you aren't doing that, I'll quote you before you can edit it out:


YOU DO NOT KNOW ME, YOU KNOW ME AS A DEFENSIVE WHINY BITCH BECAUSE THAT IS ALL YOU GUYS GIVE ME A CHANCE TO BE! I CAN'T BE MATURE, OR ANYTHING HERE BECAUSE NO MATTER WHAT I SAY ITS AS IF YOU HAVE A CRUEL COMMENT ON EVERYTHING I SAY!.

*bzzt* Wrong answer. You do not win one million dollars. You do not even get to pass Go. The only way for people here to judge you is by what you say and how you say it. And the only one who decides that is.... Who? That's right. YOU!

Being able to take responsibility for one's own actions is a sign of being mature. You do not. So, I just want to say in closing, and this is not a flame but well reasoned advice...

GROW UP.

Hugs and kisses.

Raven

[StrayRogue]

OMG. Pass me that board again. You don't like it Atheana, by all means go away and don't ask advice from us again. Ask advice from a fucking 12 gauge shotgun. Please.

[Bobmuhthol]

<<Then don't post here, make me feel like an ass and horrible when I only asked for advice and help. I'm sick of you guys being so cold hearted to me, helping me is one thing, adding the shit is another. I have a right to get upset just like the rest of you, but its not okay if I do it seems.>>

We have the right to make fun of you.

[ElvenRangeress]

Yeah keep posting. Most of you are literally assholes. Even when I actually *tried* to live up to your standards, *typing that is* you push me down, so fuck you guys. Thanks for making me out to be this asshole of a person, when I'm not. If you can't *see through my typing to what I really am* screw you. This won't get you far in life you know, making your own history on a persons real life because they made mistakes on a few things. Wow I did ect instead of etc. I'm a real bitch and deserve to die. Thanks guys, no really thanks.

[Edited on 9-26-2003 by ElvenRangeress]

[CrystalTears]

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
Then don't post here, make me feel like an ass and horrible when I only asked for advice and help. I'm sick of you guys being so cold hearted to me, helping me is one thing, adding the shit is another. I have a right to get upset just like the rest of you, but its not okay if I do it seems.

Ugh, you know what, stop asking for advice here, since you hate us all for being hypocrites and are so mean to you. Why you would want to seek advice from a set of people that you are convinced hate you is mind boggling to me.

Everyone else that comes to these boards seeking advice and help get it the same way you did, and they've mostly said "thanks" and don't come back saying our advice sucks. No one said to take our advice, but it was completely inappropriate for you to berate us for it.

[ElvenRangeress]

Want to give me advice? Give me advice on what I asked for in the first place. So leave me alone if you dont' want to.

[StrayRogue]

Perhaps she's finally getting it....

[Bobmuhthol]

We have the right not to leave you alone.

[Bobmuhthol]

<<Most of you are literally assholes.>>

Somebody doesn't know what literally means.

[StrayRogue]

MY ADVICE TO YOUR PROBLEM - GROW UP, WORK HARD, DON'T ACT LIKE A FUCKING BABY.

[Suppa Hobbit Mage]

Originally posted by ElvenRangeress
Yeah keep posting. Most of you are literally assholes. Even when I actually *tried* to live up to your standards, *typing that is* you push me down, so fuck you guys. Thanks for making me out to be this asshole of a person, when I'm not. If you can't *see through my typing to what I really am* screw you. This won't get you far in life you know, making your own history on a persons real life because they made mistakes on a few things. Wow I did ect instead of etc. I'm a real bitch and deserve to die. Thanks guys, no really thanks.

[Edited on 9-26-2003 by ElvenRangeress]

Can you literally be an asshole?

[StrayRogue]

Originally posted by CrystalTears

Make any sense? Need me to repeat it?

I bet you $100 you have to repeat it for her.

[ElvenRangeress]

I give up on you people. Have you not read the other threads? The *Ceating one* for example, because he must be a horrible disgusting guy in his real life for spelling wrong, and not making complete sentences. But no you come and pick at me, so that just proves your always going to be idiots to me, so then fuck you. And leave me alone. Funny you close threads that are insulting, and when they are off topic. I don't see what me asking for advice on a better way of handling what happened, has to do with StrayRogue making a thread and calling me fat on it, or CT telling me to grow up. So just fuck you guys, I'm tired of trying to get along with any of you because you are all cold-hearted people. So fine I won't post here again. Thanks for making me out to be this horrible *fat* and *immature* person in real life. So sweet of you guys. Maybe instead of telling me to think things through, you'll see how you are acting towards me isn't really mature either, and your telling me what to do? Right. Have a good life, and don't say I didn't try. But you guys insulting me because of my real life is going to far. And its actually getting to me, and I'm highly ashamed of this. But whatever, thanks.

[Bobmuhthol]

Didn't you already say everything in that post at least five times before?

[StrayRogue]

You made yourself out to be the immature one, dear. You didn't need ANY help from us.

[CrystalTears]

Oh bah, I deleted my last post because it's just not worth it anymore (and because it was only fair to the poor mod who is probably bald by now). I give up. I've busted through walls thicker than this.

By the way, the guy who started the "ceated" thread admitted he typed it wrong and I guess didn't know how to edit or didn't want to and didn't tell us to STFU when he was corrected.

[Edited on 9/26/2003 by CrystalTears]

[StrayRogue]

Originally posted by CrystalTears
I give up. I've busted through walls thicker than this.

LOL

[Edaarin]

Keep it civil. You all should know better. I'm no fan of Candi, but this is like 7 or 8 people against one. I understand that you all think that she's dense and can't take criticism, but this thread has been absolutely beaten to the ground several times. It's the same points over and over being raised on both sides, and even though you may not like her, take the time to reread what you post and then decide, Has it been said yet? Is there any purpose to my post except to reiterate something that made her feel like shit? Good lord. I can't believe I'm defending her. See what you made me do?

[Bobmuhthol]

Listen to the token Asian.

[Ylena]

Uhm.. where did anyone in this thread call you fat? Hon, you're infringing on my territory, I'm the only person who gets to get insulted about the "fat" thing. :)

Candi, in all sincerity, and with good intent... you really need to turn the computer off, and start doing some thinking.

You asked for advice. People gave you advice. Rather than just saying "thank you", you got defensive and complained about the advice you had solicited. I'm not trying to insult you. I'm trying to help you understand that if you're doing that right here - you're probably doing that in other places in your life.

If your reactions in your class are even a third as agitated as what you've displayed here, I can absolutely understand why your teacher doesn't recommend you for the job.

That doesn't make her "evil." She has a lot more experience with life and with students than you do. It means she's making a judgment about you that you don't agree with - but maybe it would be beneficial to you to take a dispassionate look at yourself and try to understand WHY she has the impressions about you that she does.

It would go a long way if you could, on your own, come up with some of the reasons why she didn't recommend you. If you can go to her, calmly, and say, I'm wondering if these are some of the reasons you didn't recommend me for the job, and list some of the reasons, she would probably be impressed that you were displaying maturity and insight, and would be much more willing to work with you to become the kind of adult that you have the potential to be.

There's nothing wrong with being young and emotional. We've all been there. The problem comes when you stay there and wallow in it rather than swallow your pride and get on with things.

You know what? People are going to insult you for your entire life. I'm 40 years old. People still hurt my feelings. BUT.. feelings don't matter. Feelings don't make the bed, or earn the money to put a roof over your head.

Judging from some of the comments you've made, it sounds like you've got a lot going on. Have you considered going to counselling? Sometimes, it can really help to get a truly neutral party to give you perspective on what's going on and how you're reacting.

Turn off your computer, Candi. Go for a walk. Look at the flowers and the trees. It's a great big world out there, and you've got limitless potential to do anything you truly want to do. Honestly, do you really want to waste your time on this garbage? Take a deep breath, square your shoulders.. and do what you need to do to get on with things.

Elizabeth

[HarmNone]

Good advice there from Elizabeth (Ylena). I have one more piece of advice to offer you, Candi. I think it will be of great help to you, at least here on the forums.

When someone posts something that you find insulting, do not reply to that post. No retorts. No defenses. No reply at all. Treat the post as if it does not exist.

HarmNone

[Artha]

When someone posts something that you find insulting, do not reply to that post. No retorts. No defenses. No reply at all. Treat the post as if it does not exist.

To add to that, do not make a post about yourself. You know how it's going to turn up.

[GS4Gurl]

I didn't feel like reading all the posts so If somethings been said already, I apologize.

The teacher is more than likely going by attendence because, to take care of children you have to be responsible AND reliable. Reliability is very important.

So If she thinks you can't sit in class for an hour or so how will you be able to take care of a child. It doesn't mean you aren't worthy of taking care of children. She might think you just aren't ready yet.

You really should have a talk with her. If you do talk to her don't cry, or act sad, or wounded. Be calm, friendly, and mature and above all have a good attitude. Simply say that you need a little advice about how you can improve. After all, you are still learning and thats what she is there for.

Communication is key. Don't just say you've been taking care of children all your life. Take opportunities to tell funny stories about the children you've taken care of, and any helpful tips you have learned on your own give lots of detail. Hell, bring pictures of the children you've taken care of too. That way she can see and hear better how qualified and experienced you are.

Just a few thoughts. Good luck and don't give up.

[HarmNone]

Originally posted by Artha
... do not make a post about yourself. You know how it's going to turn up.

In this particular thread, I think the intent was to get advice as to how a situation might be handled. This forum is full of people with a lot of life experience. To come here with such a question is reasonable, and I really hope Atheana's player will continue to do so. That is why I posted my suggestion about ignoring posts that one finds insulting. Doing that makes one able to get answers to real questions that might arise, while brushing off comments that are not germane to the subject. :)

HarmNone

[Artha]

In this particular thread, I think the intent was to get advice as to how a situation might be handled.

That was the intent. However, it seems everytime Atheana makes a thread about herself, it just turns into a big flame fest in no less than 5 posts.