<no attempted clever title here>

[Apotheosis]

:-X

[Jennaen]

Very nice start. :) If you really detest the entire &#039;blog&#039; idea, a clean white notebook and a favorite pen or pencil work just as well. ;)

Oh.. and Life has the damndest way of waylaying even the best-laid plans. I wouldn&#039;t sweat it so long as you have a general idea which way you&#039;re going; it&#039;s all good.

[Apotheosis]

Damn it all to hell!

that&#039;s it for today.

[Asha]

Is that a genuine nose in the avatar?

[Atlanteax]

Originally posted by Yswithe
So, as graduation date comes close, I am supposed to have figured out what I am going to do for the rest of my life, and I suppose that I have the next 5 planned out, but certainly not the rest.

I want to travel, see the world, do things other people are too scared to do, take a stab at amateur standup comedy, start my own multimedia design company/studio, and generally try to live the way that _I_ want to...

Well, sounds like you still won&#039;t know what you&#039;ll want to do at graduation (7 years is enough time) ...

So I predict that you&#039;ll end up a working stuff at Walmart putting those artsy-fartsy design skills into rearranging displays from time to time while keeping the shelves stocked.

... hey, it could happen! :smug:

[Nieninque]

Originally posted by Atlanteax

Originally posted by Yswithe
So, as graduation date comes close, I am supposed to have figured out what I am going to do for the rest of my life, and I suppose that I have the next 5 planned out, but certainly not the rest.

I want to travel, see the world, do things other people are too scared to do, take a stab at amateur standup comedy, start my own multimedia design company/studio, and generally try to live the way that _I_ want to...

Well, sounds like you still won&#039;t know what you&#039;ll want to do at graduation (7 years is enough time) ...

So I predict that you&#039;ll end up a working stuff at Walmart putting those artsy-fartsy design skills into rearranging displays from time to time while keeping the shelves stocked.

... hey, it could happen! :smug:

Worse yet, he could end up in a poncy job where he has to wear dodgy shirts and naff ties :whistle:

[Apotheosis]

Currently, I earn my living doing freelance/contract design work, I will never ever work at a wal-mart, fast food restaurant or anything like that.. I made pizza&#039;s from the age of 14 - 18 and refuse to do anything service industry related again (although design is still service related)

[Apotheosis]

Originally posted by Drayal
Is that a genuine nose in the avatar?

I suppose. some goth kid&#039;s pic I ripped from the internet, :shrug:

[Apotheosis]

ahhhhh sunday.. and it&#039;s beautiful 60 degrees or so here in Michigan.. Makes me remember why I like this state between the months of april - september.. perhaps when I am older and a bit more financially stable, i&#039;ll have a summer home/loft out here.. but that&#039;s another entry in the journal....

Anyway, trying to figure out what to post today, I have finals this week, so am pretty damn busy, but still find time to waste on the PC, although I enjoy it, and sometimes it&#039;s better then playing GS..

So, I landed a great freelance/contract design opportunity about 2 weeks ago, and I&#039;m pretty damn excited about the opportunity. It&#039;ll be worth thousands to me this summer, which is a good thing for a college student.

In the meantime I am looking a places to relocate, I&#039;ve narrowed it down to a few potential candidates: Austin, Texas (excellent grad school out there), Atlanta (once again, Georgia has an excellent grad school out there, and there&#039;s lots of employment for me), Birmingham/Royal Oak (Southeastern michigan/detroit-ann-arbor area), this &quot;corridor&quot; or section of Michigan has a diverse array of businesses, as well as employment opportunities as well, so I could do well here if I stuck to my guns and stayed put. The only discouraging thing about staying in Michigan is I want to live somewhere else.

The only thing holding me back is myself. I am one of those &quot;optimistic&quot; types who thinks that anythings possible if you work hard enough and keep trying. I really believe in myself, and have been fortunate to have had alot of support, as well as critics. I love critics because they constantly challenge me to go further, I also realize that it&#039;s pretty impossible to have 100% of people loving you, so the more aggressive my critics get, the closer I feel to achieving my goals..

My ex girlfriend and I (we live together still :(), are butting heads again, so to speak. I made a mistake moving i with her, but, oh well, such is life. I am glad I learned that lesson and was successful in not knocking her up. We&#039;re both rather stubborn people, so we can clash sometimes, but when we get along, we get along fabulously.

Well, wish I had more of a note to end on, but oddly enough, I don&#039;t.. have a nice day, people.

[HarmNone]

Congrats on landing the design project. Sounds like a good one, and the money will be a huge benefit, I&#039;m sure!

I can empathize with the desire to move and to experience different places and different things. Hope you find what you&#039;re looking for. :)

[Revalos]

Watch out if ole Sexy Exy starts macking on you if you get the freelance windfall you might perceive. She might want some payment for putting up with you.

Anyway, keep the optimism up. I tanked my grades in High School, ended up in a crappy university, but turned my life around and went to a top ranked grad school. Now I&#039;m married, I&#039;ve got my $75k per year dream job and I&#039;m buying a $250,000 home at 26 years old. Push the limits that you have and don&#039;t miss any opportunities.

Oh...whoops...you like criticism. Hmm...Get out of stupid Michigan, &#039;Sconsin is where its all at donchaknow.

[Apotheosis]

Originally posted by Revalos
Watch out if ole Sexy Exy starts macking on you if you get the freelance windfall you might perceive. She might want some payment for putting up with you.

Anyway, keep the optimism up. I tanked my grades in High School, ended up in a crappy university, but turned my life around and went to a top ranked grad school. Now I&#039;m married, I&#039;ve got my $75k per year dream job and I&#039;m buying a $250,000 home at 26 years old. Push the limits that you have and don&#039;t miss any opportunities.

Oh...whoops...you like criticism. Hmm...Get out of stupid Michigan, &#039;Sconsin is where its all at donchaknow.

no wisconsin for me, I am sorry to say.. a bit too atypical midwest for me.

The only thing I like about criticism is that it pushes me harder to prove them wrong, to a point. If it&#039;s not constructive, I write the critic off as a twat who needs a hug from mommy.

[Apotheosis]

Well, haven&#039;t done this in awhile, I suppose I feel like adding some stuff in here, at the risk of rehashing whatever I have written in the past.

Well, my room-mates coughed up the cash for rent, thank goodness.. I have worked it out with my current landlord where I have paid her for the remainder of my portion of the lease if I can get written out of the contract (in the case they pull bullshit again), her and her husband are a really nice couple, run a small business in addition to renting to students, which, I can imagine, can be a nightmare.

Living with my ex is becoming increasingly stressful as the lease comes to a close, sometimes we get along real well, sometimes we fight about pointless bullshit. I&#039;ll be glad when this is all over, but can&#039;t help but continue feeling a sense of loss, although I can&#039;t say that I quite understand it. Didn&#039;t help that her family came to visit today, I got along with them real well, so it was a bit uncomfortable seeing them. (people describe my ex as an agressive, bitchy, straightforward woman, but she was pretty hot, too, so I put up with it, and pushovers don&#039;t turn me on)

I&#039;m starting to think that I am probably not cut out for the dating scene, at least at this point in my life. At the same time I can&#039;t go to bars and pick up random slutty women, simply because they&#039;re a&gt; not always _that_ hot, and b&gt; trying to stay disease and child free. For some reason I can&#039;t get the nerve to hook up with someone that I am not friends with, oh well, guess that&#039;s &quot;my problem&quot;, as some would see it.

This past week I&#039;ve been mostly isolated from real-life social activities in order to finish some important school projects, but I would rather focus on something that&#039;s going to get me out of this area and on to something I would rather be doing, like not being in michigan :D.

On a side note, a friend and I were driving around yesterday doing some photography, and we came to a realization, err, as we always do when we actually take a look at our surroundings, the white middle-class suburbia is a nightmare, it is absolutely the most mind-numbing, jaw-clenching, teeth-gritting experience to be out in that. It is also kind&#039;ve amusing at the names of all these &quot;subdivisions&quot; as they&#039;re referred to. No matter what city you are in, there will always be a place named &quot;heron pointe&quot; or &quot;royal crest&quot; or the same variations, like &quot;heron crest&quot; and &quot;royal point&quot;.

The amount of unoriginality in the surroundings is starting to really grate on my nerves, I suppose that&#039;s what happens when you stay in the same place for too long.

Anyway, end of rant.

[Apotheosis]

hmm, well, today I&#039;ve learned a few things.

Tuesday I got in a really bad, and the last, argument with my ex. We were getting along, and then one of us(me) hated the experience enough to throw some bullshit in.
I think I have learned alot about love and hate, etc. etc..

I said some really mean things that went straight to the core of her insecurities, the stuff she said to me didn&#039;t bother me in any way.

The problem is I completely hate myself for saying shit to her that was completely uncalled for. I acted immature and went for the jugular, like I tend to do when I feel cornered.. I will not repeat what I said, ever, and will never be as big of an ass as I was the other day, because I am not proud of what I did.

All I can she is, she came into my life at a time when I really needed someone, I took her for granted, and well, isn&#039;t that the standard run of all relationships?

Why do we attack and hurt (emotionally) the ones that we feel so close to, or care about? and if we care about them, do we even do that in the first place?

[4a6c1]

ROFLMFAO!

YOU PUT IT IN YOUR SIG YOU SICK BASTARD.

I think a relationship that makes one feel trapped makes one feel resentful. Resent seeds the judgements that gives us the backing we need to insult people we care about. Most people keep these things in until they feel cornered. And then, bingo lollipop, things turn ugly. Idunno why though.

1 opinion.

[Apotheosis]

Well, finally, no more drama.. Now I am bored :D

seriously though, umm, my ex moved to France, cause she got a great internship opportunity out there. I am happy for her, this is probably the biggest opportunity she&#039;s going to ever get at this point in life, and I have nothing but faith that she&#039;s going to succeed at all that.

Meanwhile, things are getting boring on the homefront.. Moving out in a month, it&#039;s been hot as hell, still haven&#039;t decided if I am going to relocate anytime soon or not.

If I can establish a solid design business for myself here, then I will probably stay, otherwise, I am going to get what work I can find for myself, and move out by the end of next year.

Seems that everytime I accomplish something personally/professionally, the satisfaction doesn&#039;t linger long, and I keep needing to get to the next goal. I hope I can get to a point where I can be happy with my life, and for the most part I am, but I tend to fear feeling content or relaxed, because I see that as a sign of laziness or complacency, and fear that it&#039;s a trap I don&#039;t want to fall in.

I might have perfectionist tendencies.

Anyway, looking forward to a relaxing remainder of the summer.. got plenty of work lined up to keep me busy until september, when school starts, so I am pretty happy about that.

Anyway, umm, yeah, that.