for all you marketing professionals/students

[Apotheosis]

All you 'marketing majors', I have a mission for you!
If you do this well, you'll be given a personal avatar, created by me.
In addition, your website/business contact info will be put on a link to my portfolio website when it is finished.
This is strictly for personal (non financial gain) interest.

explain to me, in the most amusing, witty, intelligent way possible, what exactly a marketing major/student/businesss person does, in any area, be it promotions, research, etc... you can post as much or as little as you want. and I expect a decent turnout, damnit!


edited to change the topic

[Edited on 4-1-2005 by Yswithe]

[Edaarin]

Make coffee for accounting/finance majors.

[Alfster]

Members viewing this page: Alfster, Ganalon (3 Guests)

Looks like the marketing majors are trying to find out what they really do.

[Gan]

1. convince you that you really do have a problem that needs solved.
2. convince you that they have the solution to your problem which they helped you uncover.
3. convince you to buy said solution to said problem.

[Gan]

Originally posted by Alfster
Members viewing this page: Alfster, Ganalon (3 Guests)

Looks like the marketing majors are trying to find out what they really do.

And to think I was actually an Economics major... of course, economics is really the study of human behavior in the market place so I guess I qualify by proxy.

[Apotheosis]

Originally posted by Ganalon
1. convince you that you really do have a problem that needs solved.
2. convince you that they have the solution to your problem which they helped you uncover.
3. convince you to buy said solution to said problem.

that sounds like the job of a consultant, but it works..

[Apotheosis]

Originally posted by Edaarin
Make coffee for accounting/finance majors.


must be an intern, but I totally get it, been there

[Carl Spackler]

Someone in marketing devises a way to sell you a product, that you don't necessarily need, but have a desire for. It is there job to create that desire through advertising, promoting etc.

[Atlanteax]

Originally posted by Edaarin
Make coffee for accounting/finance majors.

While English majors flip burgers for everyone... :lol:

[Alarke]

I can't decide if this is a rip on marketing majors or just ... i really dont know. heh.

[peam]

Originally posted by Atlanteax

Originally posted by Edaarin
Make coffee for accounting/finance majors.

While English majors flip burgers for everyone... :lol:

Or do things they actually enjoy.

[Apathy]

Marketing is identifying established and new markets, or product niches I guess you could call them. It can apply to just about anything. Who do you want to sell your new car to? Obviously the demographic that can afford it, will want it, and will buy it. Where do you build your new restaurant? In the neighborhood that will give you business, is accessible from other areas, has best/easiest red tape to get around. That's research.

Promotions would fall more into the realm of advertising, which is a function of marketing. Advertising is more creative than marketing, which is much more logical and statistical. Advertising takes the information from marketing and applies creative strategy to it, then delivers it to whomever.

And we smile the whole time too :).

[Apotheosis]

Originally posted by Alarke
I can't decide if this is a rip on marketing majors or just ... i really dont know. heh.

this isn't a rip on anything,, I am simply asking people who are marketing professionals, marketing students, or someone who knows a bit about marketing to tell me what it is in a creative, humorous, witty, intelligent way, as best as possible.....

I am a marketing/graphic design student, so I know a thing or two about marketing.

This post was intentionally created in order to elicit a response to the above request. In exchange, I will create an avatar, based on my graphic art, and also give them a link to their contact/personal website, whatver on my portfolio site (when it's finished)..

the reason: I am bored, amuse me with your wit and whatever professional endeavors I come across, I will be sure to mention whoever writes, IMO the funniest thing..

Finally, within 1 week, I will hold a poll on the PC in order to give everyone a fair shot, so in addition to my preference, everyone else has an opportunity to participate

[Apotheosis]

BUMP

[TheRoseLady]

Well marketing is concerned with the 4 P's :

Product, Price, Promotion and Physical Distribution.

Most Marketing majors find themselves schlepping about stores building displays, hawking their wares and doing paperwork in the evening to make up for the afternoon that they spent at the mall shopping or on the golf course.

[Gan]

I found a formal definition for marketing: "The process of planning and executing the conception, pricing, promotion, and distribution of goods, services, and ideas to create exchanges that satisfy individual and organisation objectives."

Yet I cant find any amusing way to sumrise what those in the marketing profession (other than what I go through in consulting with existing and future clients) go through or how they define what they do. Perhaps thats why I wasnt specifically a marketing major; however, economics is just as dry when you get down to it. Perhaps I'll look up some marketing jokes and see what pops up.

[Apotheosis]

Originally posted by Ganalon
I found a formal definition for marketing: "The process of planning and executing the conception, pricing, promotion, and distribution of goods, services, and ideas to create exchanges that satisfy individual and organisation objectives."

Yet I cant find any amusing way to sumrise what those in the marketing profession (other than what I go through in consulting with existing and future clients) go through or how they define what they do. Perhaps thats why I wasnt specifically a marketing major; however, economics is just as dry when you get down to it. Perhaps I'll look up some marketing jokes and see what pops up.

feel free to take a shot at what your perspective is

[Gan]

I found some jokes, seems there are jokes abundant for any profession. This one though, I thought was apropriate to the given thread. And I'm still working on my perspective...

________________
Marketing Explained

You go to a party and you see an attractive girl across the room. You go up to her and say, "Hi, I'm great in bed, how about it?"
That's Direct Marketing.

You go to a party and you see an attractive girl across the room. You give your friend a buck. She goes up and says "Hi, my friend over there is great in bed, how about it?"
That's Advertising.

You go to a party and see an attractive girl across the room. You somehow get her mobile number. You call and chat her up a while and then say "Hi, I am great in bed, how about it?"
That's Tele-Marketing.

You go to a party and see an attractive girl across the room. You recognize her. You walk up to her, refresh her memory and get her to laugh and giggle and then suggest, "Hi, I am great in bed, how about it?"
That's Customer Relationship Management.

You go to a party and you see an attractive girl across the room. You stand straight, you talk soft and smooth, you open the door for the ladies, you smile like a dream, you set an aura around you playing the Mr. Gentleman and then you move up to the girl and say, "Hi, I am great in bed, how about it?"
That's Hard Selling.

You go to a party, you see an attractive girl across the room. SHE COMES OVER and says, "Hi, I hear you're great in bed, how about it?"
Now THAT is the power of Branding.

[Apotheosis]

Originally posted by Ganalon
I found some jokes, seems there are jokes abundant for any profession. This one though, I thought was apropriate to the given thread. And I'm still working on my perspective...

________________
Marketing Explained

You go to a party and you see an attractive girl across the room. You go up to her and say, "Hi, I'm great in bed, how about it?"
That's Direct Marketing.

You go to a party and you see an attractive girl across the room. You give your friend a buck. She goes up and says "Hi, my friend over there is great in bed, how about it?"
That's Advertising.

You go to a party and see an attractive girl across the room. You somehow get her mobile number. You call and chat her up a while and then say "Hi, I am great in bed, how about it?"
That's Tele-Marketing.

You go to a party and see an attractive girl across the room. You recognize her. You walk up to her, refresh her memory and get her to laugh and giggle and then suggest, "Hi, I am great in bed, how about it?"
That's Customer Relationship Management.

You go to a party and you see an attractive girl across the room. You stand straight, you talk soft and smooth, you open the door for the ladies, you smile like a dream, you set an aura around you playing the Mr. Gentleman and then you move up to the girl and say, "Hi, I am great in bed, how about it?"
That's Hard Selling.

You go to a party, you see an attractive girl across the room. SHE COMES OVER and says, "Hi, I hear you're great in bed, how about it?"
Now THAT is the power of Branding.


:lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol: :lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::spin::lol::lol::lol::lol ::lol::lol::lol:

[Apotheosis]

anyone else wanna take a stab at this?